Aug 11, 2025
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hc that gojo crossdressed a lot in high school, mostly to piss off his parents but also because he finds joy in it (and suguru admitted he likes it)
Relatively new Tumblr user here thinking about how it's called a dashboard and now I'm scrolling while making racecar noises
Part one or something idk we’ll see
If there where words the office could use to describe Xolo, it would be the most negative words that come to mind.
“She acts like she owns the place.”
“She can’t take a joke.”
“She told me to re-do all of my reports.”
“She said my cat was ugly.”
“She’s too cocky.”
“She is a total bitch.”
These descriptions weren't entirely wrong either.
becoming one of the youngest Lawyers in New York was an accomplishment in of itself, but to then move up the career ladder of the nations most well known law firms? That could give anyone a big ego.
Walking out of a courthouse, Xolo walked through the paparazzi that threw themselves at her.
“Is it true that your clients internet history had incriminating evidence?!”
“Do you even have hope for this case?!”
Xolo adjusted her sunglasses and spotted her ride from across the group.
“I don't want to answer questions right now.” she responded, cutting through the cameras and jumping into the car.
As the driver made their way back to the office, Xolo took off her sunglasses and fixed her hair.
"Christ," she muttered, putting her seatbelt on.
"You okay?" Alison asked.
Alison was Xolo’s friend from work (as well as roommate). She was the secretary to the Chief Legal Officer at the firm they worked at. She was the one who snuck Xolo an interview spot, knocking out a Courtney Weaver from the time slot.
"Yeah, I'm fine, just a bunch of reporters and paparazzi." Xolo responded, resting her head against the seat's head rest.
Alison nodded sympathetically.
"There’s so many eyes on this case, especially since those true crime youtubers found out about it." Alison remarked.
Xolo sighed.
"Yeah," she mumbled, "don’t remind me, and it doesn’t help that my phone’s been acting up at the courthouse, I still haven’t gotten that email from Daniel. I really needed it today.”
They continued to drive in silence, until Xolo pulled out her phone to check her emails.
A frown appeared on her face when she saw something was missing.
"Is Daniel in today?" Xolo refreshed her email, just to make sure it wasn’t her end.
Alison nodded, a confused look on her face.
"I saw him talking to Kate before I left. Why do you ask?"
"He was supposed to email me an important file for the case before the trial." Xolo groaned, feeling the annoyance bubble in her. “I thought maybe my phone wasn’t working cause of the reception at the courthouse, but it’s working fine now, and I still don’t have the email.” she covered her face and screamed into her sleeves trying to muffle the sounds of her anger.
Daniel had been Xolo’s assistant for three months, and he was completely and utterly incompetent. The only reason why Xolo allowed him stay was because she couldn’t find someone else to replace him. Daniel couldn’t get a simple lemonade for Xolo when she asked him to grab her one, he couldn’t organize files the way they needed to be organized, and he talked waaay too much to the new intern Kate, who had just turned 19.
Daniel couldn’t even type well.
Xolo tapped on Daniel’s contact and called him.
"Hi boss." he answered.
Xolo pinched the bridge of her nose.
"Where was that email I needed for today?" Xolo asked, taking deep breaths and trying to calm herself down.
Daniel laughed quietly.
"Ahh.. that was today?" Daniel began.
"Oh my god." Xolo scoffed.
“Just tell me you called Marcus about the architectural suggestions.”
Daniel chuckled nervously.
“You gotta be fucking-” Xolo screamed again and rolled down her window. With all her force, she threw her phone out onto the traffic of the road.
It wasn’t until she saw Alisons widen she realized what she had done.
“I’m gonna kill him.” Xolo huffed angrily.
By the time they got to the firms building, a pathway had already cleared for the clearly angry girl.
She and Alison reached their floor, and as if she sniffed him out, she spotted Daniel and snapped her fingers.
“Daniel! My office!” she shouted, anger bubbling as she saw him jump away from Kate and follow her into her office.
Alison shook her head and went to her desk.
Xolo entered her office, and when Daniel followed, she closed the door behind her and spun around to face him, glaring daggers at the man.
She took a threatening step towards him, “Do you know why I’m upset?” Xolo questioned him.
Daniel tried to avoid her gaze, “Cuz’ I didn’t send the email?” He stammered.
Xolo nodded with him, “because you didn’t send the email. Do you know how that makes me look? When my client has a severe anxiety disorder and I’m the one who has to step up, except i have nothing for his defense?”
Daniel rolled his eyes, causing Xolo to scoff.
Xolo turned away from him and leaned against her desk, facing the front of the room.
“You know what, you clearly don’t respect me as your boss, and you cannot follow the simplest of instructions, so you’re fired.” Xolo glanced over to Daniel. “Hand me your pager and planner.” she demanded.
It was Daniel’s turn to scoff.
“Yeah, okay.” Daniel shook his head and threw his pager on the ground, “I quit, I can’t handle the nagging, the absolute pain in the ass you are.”
Xolo crossed her arms and tilted her head at Daniel.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that asking for files in a timely matter was nagging, I’ve always thought it was your incompetence.”
Daniel laughed and turned to her door. He slammed it opened and walked out.
“I am so glad you’re letting me go, because if I had to work for you any longer, I would’ve killed myself.” Daniel shouted into the office, catching everyone’s attention.
Xolo clenched her jaw and glared at him.
“And no one here would fault me either, cause you’re a compete and total bitch!”
“Yeah, okay. Goodluck trying to find another kid intern to fuck, ‘barely legal teen with braces humiliates small cock’.” Xolo called out. David’s eyes widen as his face rushed with blood.
“Next time you wanna watch porn on company time, do it on your phone and not the computer we provide, you borderline pedophile.” Xolo replied, before everyone scurried to their respective areas at the sound of a glass door opening.
David glanced over at the Chief Legal Officer, who had stepped out of his office to see what the disorder was about.
Marcus looked at the scene and then quickly turned his head toward David, “If you’ve been terminated, you may leave. You’ll get your final paycheck at the end of the month.”
David nodded and started to grab his things.
Marcus’ attention went over to Xolo, “My office, now” He ordered.
Once both were seated inside his office, Marcus turned to look at Xolo.
“What the hell, Xolo?” he questioned.
“He failed to do simple tasks, Mr. Dermont-!” she exclaimed.
“and so you resort to calling him a pedophile? Listen Xolo, word on the street is that this case isn’t going well. Some are saying it’s gonna be your first loss in two years, a mans life is in your hands.” Marcus spoke sternly.
He placed his hands on his desk and leaned closer to Xolo, placing his elbows on it.
“And I get it, I was a little older then you when I dealt with my first criminal case like this, but this isn’t judge Judy, this is real life. You need to get your shit together, or else I’ll have to demote you to BS cases and parking tickets, is that clear?” Marcus inquired, raising a brow.
Xolo sighed and nodded.
“Yes, Sir.”
Xolo stood up and left Marcus’ office and closed the door. She leaned against Alisons desk and covered her face.
“What was that?” Alison questioned, concern written across her features.
“That was him telling me to stop doing stupid shit and that if i fail this case, I’m going back to parking ticket cases.” Xolo groaned as she buried her head in her hands.
Alison frowned. "How about we order thai for dinner? we can also post a job offer so you can find a new assistant."
“Yesss, thank you, Alison. Let me finish up my reports and I’ll see you in a few.”
Thomas poked at his blue friend’s face, drinks facing them on the bar they sat at.
“Hey buddy, come on.” Thomas pestered Ben, who only groaned in response.
“Let me wallow in my dispair.” Ben whined as he took a sip of his cheap liquor.
Thomas sighed, trying to find the right words to help his friend.
“Okay dude… I know you’ve had a tough week-”
“if you mean getting fired by your 9-5 and getting dumped by your girlfriend, then yeah, I’ve had a pretty tough week.” Ben sarcastically interrupted.
“I’m just saying, the faster you get on your feet, the faster you can move on.” Thomas explained.
Ben stared at him for a few seconds. “so what I’m hearing is that you want me to start applying to jobs after I just got fired three days ago?”
Thomas nodded, “Just apply to a shit ton of jobs man. it’ll be good, even if you get rejected by half of them.”
The taxi ride home to their shared apartment had been filled with job ideas. Security guard, Zumba instructor, dog walker and plumber where thrown out there, but when they arrived home, Ben and Thomas applied everywhere. They even applied to the shitty McDonalds a block away.
Ben scrolled on his laptop, only stopping when Thomas pointed something out.
“Oh, dude- look.” Thomas tapped the screen.
Ben raised his brows, looking at Thomas. He laughed and shook his head.
“An assistant? Really?” he asked, incredulously.
Thomas shrugged “Why not? I mean, you applied to the place that spit in your coke?”
Ben nodded, not wanting to be reminded of it.
"okay, okay, I’ll do it." Ben announced.
Almost an hour had passed before any place got back to him.
A small notification popped up on the top right of Ben’s screen.
“Look, it’s that assistant job.” Ben showed Thomas, who leaned closer.
“What’d they say?”
He clicked the notification to open it.
“Thank you for applying... we would like to get to know you more... confirm interview date..!” Ben read the message aloud.
“Sick!” Thomas stepped away from Ben, holding out his fist.
Ben bumped his fist with Thomas’ and confirmed the interview date.
Ben stood from his place at the table and walked over to his room. “I have an interview in two days to prepare for, wish me luck!” he waved off to his friend before retreating to his room for the night.
skrrt skrrt vroom beep beep, by me
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I love it when my skin crawls about a person after my intuition kicks in
12 DAYS OF GRUMPY CAT CHRISTMAS COMICS #5: Boo, Betamax
http://nerdi.st/1QvXTjL
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