#skyler flagger

[officialparamorefanfiction]

All I wanted (Skyler)

So i was browsing the internet and Ive pretty much made up my mind. This is what Skyler would look like if she were real (from the newer chapter where shes dyed her hair a dark brown) :P (Shes contemplating the nose ring.)

[officialparamorefanfiction]

All I wanted chapter 17

The next morning I woke up at around 10. I sat up to seel taylor sleeping beside me. i smiled leaning over and kissing his lips softly. I got up and chekced on hayley. She was texting on her phone as i laughed jumping on the bed beside her

"morning" she said 

"haha morning mrs. i fall asleep halfway through the awesome movies" i said as she laughed

"sorry, I didnt mean to. Thanks for letting me crash here" she said smiling looking at her phone

"ah no probs what do ya want for breakfast?" i asked

"sorry I gotta head out soon. Promised dakotah wed go see some weird museum together" she said looking at me

"alright thats cool. In that case im going back to sleep. just tell me when your leaving" i said yawning as she laughed

"haha alright, but wait"she said as i sighed realizing she remebered

"what was this real story you were talking about?" she asked as i sighed sitting on the edge of the bed.

"when we met I was going through a rough patch in my life. I was on the road growing up much faster than i should of not to mention my dad had just died that year my parents had also gotten divorced. It was hard for me and then I met tegan. We hit it off immdiately. It was great. She showed me a whole new better brighter side to life. Thats when we first hooked up. One thing led to another and after every show wed go hang out and always end up making out. She had some weird effect on me. She kenw everything I told her everything and I knew everything about her. Thats when things started getting serious and we actaully started dating. tegan asked me out and To my suprise I said yeah" i said frowning as i heard the door open.

"skyler?" taylor asked as i looked at him shocked with the same shocked face he was giving me.

"shit" hayley said under her breath as i stood up

"yeah?" i asked as he walked away

"wait taylor" i said following him. Me and hayley exchanged glances. I pulled his arm

"taylor whatd you hear?" i asked

"enough. Why didnt you tell me any of this? You dated tegan?! It makes sense now, why you guyswere always all over each other. Jesus skyler. This isnt something you just brush aside." he said 

"what did you want me to say taylor? Ohh yeah. Im skyler. 22 ohh and by the way I dated Tegan quinn? I mean seriously This sitn something you just bring up in conversation okay?" i said as he shook his head

"how long?" he asked

I lokoed down "a year" I said as he shook his head

"a year? You dated her for a full year and you didnt tell me? What kind of relationship do we have where you cant even tell me this?" he asked 

"taylor your making this much worst than it needs to be. Youve dated girls before me. So what i dated tegan" i said as he sighed

"thats not the point! Your touring with this girl you were in love with! I mean you dated for a year... you couldnt even tell me.... I thought we were better than that skyler. I cant even deal with this right now. I gotta go" he said grabbing hsi jacket as he wlaked out the house

"taylor" i said as he left. I felt myself breathing hard as i tried to stop from crying. I leaned against the door and slid down putting my face into my hands. I cried. hard. I was breathing so hard i felt a strong pang in my ribcage. I grabbed it but it just made me cry harder

"skyler" hayley said walking over as she hugged me tightly

"everything will be okay I promise" hayley whispered as i shook my head no.

"no its not! He hates me!" i said crying into my hands as she hugged me tighter

"no. he doesnt hate you hes just upset" she said trying to calm me.

"hayley. please. I just... I need to be alone" i said as she nodded. I felt her kiss my forehead softly as she hugged me tightly

"alright Ill see you later skyler. Call me if you need anything. Ill try and check back with you later" she said as i nodded. She left hugging me one more time as i cried on the floor. I went to my bed and cried more. I didnt know what to do.  I got a text message from dave.

"hey skyler. Just reminding you about the photoshoot at 2 today its at 4th avenue the big areana place illn send you the exact adress hold on"

I sighed. I walked to the bathroom looking at bloodshot eyes. I was a mess. I looked at the time. It was 11:45. I had to get ready. I really wanted to cancel but i know ryan would get pissed at me. I took a shower feeling numb and hurt and washed my hair. I pulled on some skinny jeans and one of taylors t-shirts. I felt myself wanting to cry again. I tried to hold myself together. I pulled my hair into a pony tail. Wow hadnt rocked one of these in awhile. I did a little make up and brushed my teeth. I slipped into some flip flops and grabbed a bag as i got ready to go. I drove to the place as i thought. I was flipping through the radio stations as i heard it.

"yes we have paramore on the phone right now, welcome welcom" the radio interviewer said

"hey mike thanks for calling us" jerm said

"alright so we have some questions for you. Whens this new album coming out?" mike asked

"umm hopefully over this summer when we finish recording" hayley said

"awesome, well we have this question from a fan. What do each of you look for in a significant other" he asked

"well. I think just being able to hang with him with my friends is really imporatant. I love a mans man. Someone who can get along with everyone" hayley said

"haha um not really sure yet, I kinda just wait see what comes my way" jerm said 

"what about you taylor?" mike asked

"um. Trust. Trust is really really to me. I want to be able to look her in the eyes and tell shes not lying about something or everything ya know? I want to be able to have that sable fondation because how am i supposed to love someone who lies to me about things" taylor said. I felt my throat close up. I changed the station as i tried to hold myself together. I drove to the photoshoot venue at 1:55. I walked inside as they signed me in and took me to get dressed. I was put into a long sleeve tight white shirt with some black skinny jeans and a awesome seat belt belt. I took my arm out of the sling this morning since it seemed fine for the photoshoot. I got make up and they put my hair down. I kinda just felt like a robot. I sat in the make up chair as i got on my phone. I decided to log onto my website when I read some user comments

Juliespell232: skyler when are you coming back? Write again. It always makes me feel better

JamesU2: Dude skyler is amazing! I love how close and interactive she stays with her fans.

S.F.fan232: Skyler I LOVE YOU!!

I smiled and decided to write a blog. I started typing and ended up with this.

"Hey guys. Sorry I havent been on in awhile but im sure you guys saw my interview yesterday. Im actually in a make up chair right now getting ready for a photo shoot but I felt the need to write to yall again. Today I wanna talk about love. Fair warning for anyone who doesnt like all the gushy mushy stuff. One of the most dangerous things about falling in love is the risk you take knowing that at any moment that someone could no longer be yours. So why do we do it? Why do we open our hearts to feel vulnerable and broken? Because falling in love is a humans most divine sense of feeling. For some people the love they have never fades. It exists as long as they exist. And when the world tries to invade what they have waited so long to feel, they wrap their fingers around it and never let go. White knuckles, red palm, they never let go. But with that love comes an ache that can never be rid of. Is that uncontrollable and unstoppable realization that you have no power over the way you feel. You are victim to the sting of love. It hurts as much as it heals. For some, that ache wears on their soul, and they find themselves forgetting why they loved in the first place. They let go, release the tension in their hand, and watch as the very thing they once held dear fades away. So why do we do it? Why do we fall in love? Because even if the person you love gives up on you, even if you give up on the person you love, what has been will never change. The way your heart felt while it did last makes the risk worth it. Never forget what you did have. Maybe one day, you will find each other again. Maybe one day, youll both remember why you loved so deeply. Maybe one day, you wont. But no one can take away what your heart so fondly remembers. So with that when you find someone you love. Dont give up on them. Dont push them away or lie or anything like that because your not only hurting your self... but the person who loves you too. Stay strong, carry on and NFY.

Always,

                                Skyler 

I posted it then logged off as they called me to do the shoot. I changed about 6 times and had justas many diffrent backshots when I finally finished at 5. I was tired and ready to go home when we finished but they gave me some of the awesome outfits from the photoshoot. I got in my car as i raelized I had a call. I looked at it. A missed call from taylor. My heart skipped a beat. I called him back

"hello?" he asked

"hey. You called?" i asked sititng in my car scared as i waited for a response

"yeah. Can we talk. Like tomrrow?" he asked

"yeah. Where?" i asked

"meet me at that vegan shop down in franklin at noon" he said

"Alright." i said

"alright bye" taylor said 

"wait taylor.... im sorry" i whispered but I heard the dial tone. I closed my eyes and tried to gain my composure. I pulled out of the venue and drove home. I got home tired and worried. I didnt know what to do. I sat down on my couch as i someone called me. I wiped my nose.

"hello?" i asked

"hey sky, its mom just wanted to tell you we landed well we actually landed a couple hours ago but i forgot to call you" my mom said

"ohh good." i said

"you alright sweetie?" she asked

"yeah. Im fine mom. Hows everyone?" i asked

"ohh okay. Theyre good.  We all got a bit of jet lag though especially caleb, he keeps talking about when hes gonna see taylor haha" my mom said as i felt a pang of hurt

"yeah" i said trying to laugh

"you sound tired ill let you go sweetie" she said

"alright thanks mom. Ill talk to you later" i said 

"yeah. Love you skyler. Bye" my mom said

"love you too mom bye" I said hanging up as i laid on the couch and watched tv. I realized the movie fast five was still in the dvd played. I watched it again... alone. I cried. My day was horrible. I heard a knock on my door as i got up to answer it. Hayley smiled as i tried to smile

"aww sky, please smile your killing me" hayley said as i laid on the couch. She laid beside me

"he wants to meet tomrrow and have lunch" i said

"thats always good" she said trying to cheer me up

"Unless he decided to break up with me" I said as she frowned

"i dont think he will." she said as i turned to face her

"I really screwed up hayley... and I cant fix any of it" i said as she frowned

"Everything that might happen is going to for a reason. maybe you guys are supposed to break up. Who knows maybe if you guys do youll both see how much you really need each other or you might find someone new we cant control fate" she said as i frowned

"Im just. Im tired. Of it all. He was my rock." i said frownign as she hugged

"im here for you no matter what happens" she said as i hugged her back

"thank you" i said as we parted

"when do you go back on toour?" she asked

"in two days" i said frowning

"isnt that good?" she asked

"Im just afraid things wont be fixed before I leave" i said 

"just dont worry about it , Go get some sleep and stop watching thsi boring movie" hayley said as i laughed

"its a good movie" i said as she rolled her eyes

"ill text ya" she said as we both got up hugging.

"thanks hayles" i said as she waved and walked out the door. i went and changed into some pajamas. I went to bed trying to sleep. I  was restless all night. A alarm went of at 11:00 waking me up as i took a shower and got dressed. I pulled on some skinny jeans and a white shirt. Nothing too special. I straightened my bangs and put some make up to hide the bags under my eyes. I walked to my closet slipping into my favorite white air forces.  I grabbed a cute scarf and grabbed my stuff walking otu the door. I drove to the vegan place. I saw taylor at a table outside. I took a deep breath and got out the car. I walked up and sat down across from him.

"hey" he said

"hey" i said back as I put my bag down

"wheres your arm slink?" he asked

"my arm was feeling better so I took it off" i said as he nodded

"thats good." he said as i ordered a water so did taylor along with a little pastry.

We made small talk till our food came as he finally came out with what id been dreading.

"we need talk skyler... about us" he said as i frowned stopping as i looked up

"i know" i said as i waited for him.

"what you did... you lied to me. What kind of trust am i supposed to have with you when you not only lied about who you dated but how much feelings were really invested in that relationship. The same person your about to go back on tour with doing God knows what with." he said

"taylor it was never like that. I didnt mean to lie to you. I never talk about my past, I hate it and I especially never talk about my past that involved tegan hayley only found out because of james. I dont tell anyone about her and me. There was nothing between us we hadnt spoken in years" i said as he frowned

"Did you love her?" he asked as i looked away. He waited for my response

"I did. But i dont anymore" i said as he frowned

"I just... I think we should take a break before things realyl do get too serious. Give each of us both time to see if we really want this" he said sa i frowned

"I already know I do taylor" i said as he frowned

"im not sure if I do anymore though. I think its best if we stay friends for now. You go enjoy tour and Ill try and figure things out" he said as i looked at him shocked. I was not going to cry. I was not going to cry. Skyler dont you cry! I bit my lip.

"Fine" i said getting up as i got my bill. It was 5 something but i didnt feel like waiting around wiht him. I put a 10 on the table  and packed up my stuff

"bye" he said as i didnt say anything. I got into my car as i felt the tears overwelm me. I cried into my hands. I pulled out and drove home. I didnt know what else to do. I was leaving for tour tomrrow morning. I tried to focus on packing up all my clothes but i kept finding taylors. i couldnt take it anymore. I sat down crying on the floor of my bedroom. I looked up just to see more pictures of us. I couldnt take this! I got up angry and upset as i tore down all the pictures of us. I put them into the ttrash and gathered his clothes putting them into a box. I was so angry. When I finished i finished packing and packing. I didnt know what else to do. I fell asleep in a pile of clothes.

I woke up to my phone alarm going off. it was 9 am. I had to go catch my 11 oclock flight. I got my stuff together and changed itno some sweat pants. I was walking out the door with all my stuff just as hayley pulled up

"hey" she said as i couldnt even bring myself to smile. I loaded my luggae into the car with her help

"howd the lunch go?" she asked

"we broke up" i said my lips quivering. I felt her immdiately hug me tightly

"dont worry about it skyler. Please. Just enjoy the tour give the fans a time of their life and just forget about everything else thats going on. " she said as i nodded

"bye hayles" i said as she smiled

"bye sky. Ill call you later" she said helping me witht he last bag as i waved and we both drove away. I got to the airport where i loaded my luagged and caught my plane just in time.  We were flying up to new york to get our buses. It was too long. i slept most of the way. I woke up as we landed and I walked off. I heard someone call my name. I turned around to see josh smiling at me. I tried to smile back as he hugged me

"sky! been forever! " he said as i nodded

"yeah" i said as he frowned

"whats wrong?" he asked as the other you me at six guys came over saying hi

"nothing." i said as he frowned

"do i need to go kick taylors ass?" he asked laughing

"we broke up" i said as he nodded frowning

"im sorry to hear that" he said as i nodded

"wheres the buses?"i asked

"right outside. Better hurry fans are come in swarms" he said laughing as we walked together to the bus. I got onto mine as josh came on to. He helped me with my luggae. The buses were going to be driven to a diffrent location away from the fans so we just chilled together. I told him what had happened leaving out the tegan part but he undestood

"dont worry it get easier" he said as i hugged him

"I hope so" i said as we cotninuted to talk till we arrived. I had already unpacked all my stuff and changed into some jean shorts and a love movement hoodie. We walked off as everyone was hanging out at a bonfire since it was late. We walked over as i noticed tegan. I frowned. She turned around and smiled

"hey" tegan said

"hi" i said as she frowned

"heard about you and taylor. Sorry" she said

"jeez the you me at six guys have big mouths" i said mkaing us both laugh to my suprise

"lets go take a walk" she said holding her hand out. I hesitantly took it as we walked around.

"So what happened?" she asked

"he found out that I had dated you, and thought id lied t him. It was just like something small was turned into something much bigger than it shouldve been" i said

"Im sorry. Well now your a single woman get who ever you want" she said as i frowned

"i dont want to get with anyone. I want taylor" i said as we sat on a table.

"how are you and the sound check girl?" i asked

"it was only a hook up skyler." she said as i nodded rememebing walking in on them

"aww cmon dont tell me your still upset about that" she said

"no. I honestly dont even care anymore" i said as she frowned

"you dont?" she asked

"no" i said as she nodded

"jeez this is worse than i thought. We needa get your mind off taylor" she said taking my hand as we went back to the bonfire. Everyone was dancing and having fun as tegan tried to take me into the crowd. I pulled back

"tegan. I dont feel that great. Im just gonna head to my bus" i said as she frowned but let me go. I went to my bus and laid in my bunk tired and hurting. I laid in my bunk as i saw the pictures of me and tyalor at the top. I frowned as i turned over and cried harder. I shook my head and cried myself to sleep. I woke up the next day as people knocked on my door.

"get up sky!" josh said as i slipped outta bed. I opened the door as he and dan walked in.

"morning sleepy head" he said as i tried to smile. I walked back over to the couch as they sat by me

"please cheer up sky. We all hate seeing you like this" dan said as i leaned on him softly

"i cant help it." i said softly as he hugged me softly.

"well yyou gotta get up for sound check." Josh said as i nodded

"ill see you guys there" i said as the relucatnatly left. I put on my warm up pants and a swellers t-shirt. and some vans. I pulled my hair into a bun and washed my face. I put a little make up on and walked out to sound check. Dougie shaun tom and jake were all here. I said hi but im pretty sure everyone knew I was outta it. We praticed a couple songs since the shows didnt actually start till a few days later. It was nice gettting to sing again my heart just wasnt into it. We finished and everyone went out to dinner. I decided to stay. i went to my bus and just sat around. I got on my laptop as someone knocked on my door

"come in" i yelled as tegan walkedon.

"hey" she said as i half smiled

"Skyler. You needa get over this kid" she said sitting beside me

"I cant" i said

"whhy not?" she asked clearly annoyed

"because i love him" i said to her completely serious

"how can you love him when he doesnt love you?" she spat back. I felt the sting on that. it made me think and think.

"i dont know" i said with a slightly wimper in my voice as it cracked. I blinked back tears

'"skyler dont waist your life beeing sad over him if hes not sad over you. You need to move on. we all miss the fun loving skyler we were just on tour wiht" tegan said touching my hand softly. I shook ym head. I had a sudden realization. Tegan was right. I couldnt wait around forever for taylor. He dumped me over this stupid thing. He broke his promise... he broke my heart. I felt angry inside of me... but most of all I wanted revenge. I bit my lip as i got up.

"your right tegan" i said as she looked at me shocked

"I am?" she asked as i laughed

"yeah, you are. I cant sulk around here forever. Get the guys were gonna go get smoe drinks" i said as she smiled

"theres my girl! but you might wanna change" she said as i laughed

"shut up. haha go tell em ill meet you at your bus in a few" i said as she nodded and walked out. I pulled my phone out

@SkylerFlagger: Sometimes you gotta get your shit together and start enjoying life again.#LifeQuotes

@Yelyahwilliams: @SkylerFlagger: Wooo! There ya go! Save some for me!

@SkylerFlagger: @yelyahwilliams: OF COURSE :D 

I logged off and went to my closet. I found some really cute skinny jeans taht made my butt look awesome and cute low cut shirt. I laid out my clothes and took a shower. I washed my hair and stepped out. I felt clean and renewed. I still missed taylor but I wasnt going to let anyone see it anymore. I dried off and slipped into my outfit. I put on my gray and black vans and untangled my hair. I finished and blow dryed it dry and left it down. Hmm wonder what id look with a nose piercing... I shook the thoughts away as i brushed my teeth and walked out. I grabbed a pair of sunglasses, some moneyand my phone. I walked off the bus and went to tegans. I walked on as she smiled

"hey the guys are gonna meet us at that little palce on 103rd." she said as i nodded

"you ready?" i asked

"yeah. took ya long enough. though I must say you clean up pretty well" she said laughing

"I know" i said smiling as we walked off her bus. We walked off the venue and to 103rd and walked into this little what you would think was a coffee shop. Inside we walked where the secuirty let us in and i heard a guy singing and playing the guitar. I walked in as the guys smiled calling us over. I passed the guy playing guitar as i reconizged him. It was John mayer. I smiled as he smiled back

"alright ladies and gentleman my last song for the night. This is called your body is a wonderland" he said as josh walked over

"hey" he said as i smiled hugging him. still listenign to john as he sang

"and if you want love well make it. swim in a deep sea of blankets take all yoru big plans and break em, this is bound to be awhile. Your body is a wonderland" he sang as i turned my attention back to the guys. The waiter came over as i ordered some champange. We drank and talked as i was still listened to the song john sang

"damn baby.... You frustrate me. I know your mine all mine  but you look so good it hurts sometimes" he sang as they did a cool instrumental. I took another sip of my champanhge as i heard my name called

"so your back?" dan asked

"Yeah" i said smiling as they cheered

"woo! for single skyler"  josh said as we all laughed. I heard the song end as i saw john walk off the stage. Our eyes met again as he smiled then walked backstage. We all were talking when they all looked at someone. i turned around as john stepped up

"I hope im not inturpting, you folks looked like you were having a good ol time hope you dont mind if I join" he asked leaning on the seat next to me

"no at all" tegan said as he smiled and took a seat by me

"John" he said as i smiled

"im skyler, thats dan, josh, and tegan" i said

"ahh. You guys are on that tour right?"he asked

"yeah thats us" dan said as he smiled

We all talked with john drinking and having a good time till i looked at the time.

"aww man getting late. we better head back to the buses" Tegan said

"yeah, it was awesome meeting you john"i said as he smiled

"you too skyler" he said

"hey the fun doesnt have to end now you guys should come over t our bus for a bit. hang out" dan said smiling

"if yall are alright with it im down" john said

"sure why not" i said as we paid for our bill and left. We were walking out the door as i started to trip. John laughed and laught my hand interlocking our hands as i regained my balance as we walked outside to the waiting paparazzi. I put a hand over my face not really being able to see over the bright flashes. He tighten his grip "

"follow me" he said in my ear as we walked to a waiting car as we all got in closing the door the paparrazzi.

"wow that was crazy. They usualy arent all waiting for us" I said

"yeah sorry. that was my bad. I had announced I was hanging here earlier" john said as we laughed

Josh told the driver where to go as we laughed talked and opened another bottle of champnage. We were all having a balst as we pulled up to the bus stepping outside. I walked onto the guys bus first

'hey kiddos, where yall been?" max asked as i smiled at him chirss and matt

"we brought a friend" i said as john stepped through

"hey im john" john said as eveyrone got aquinted. We all hung out in the backroom as chris and matt of course went to bed first. I was laughing at one of johns crazy stories as my phone rang. I looked at it. It was a text message but I wasnt really in the mood to answer it. Alright alright. its really getting late i should go" joshn said as we all laughed

"yeah. I think weve had enough fun for one night. I gotta walk back to my bus" i said getting up

"Ill walk you while I wait for my driver" john said as i nodded

"bye guys" i said wvaing as they waved half drunk. We got outside as we both stubled down the stepts

"you think weve had too much to drink?" he asked

"haha just maybe" i said as we walked to my bus

"Im really glad I met you. you guys are all really awesome" he said as we walked

"thanks. We try" i said as he laughed

"We should definately hang out again" he said looking at me

"id like that" i said as we stopped in front of my bus as we saw a car in the distance.

"im thinking thats my ride" he said as i nodded

"umm heres my number just call or text me when you wanna hang" i said as i wrote it in his phone. He smiled as he opened his arms for a hug. i hugged him as he laughed

"ill call you later. Maybe get some coffee or something" he said 

"thatd be cool, just make sure its either in the morning or evening we have sound check around noon" I said as we parted

"will do. Ill see you later skyler" he said

"you can call me sky" i said as he smiled opening his car door

"goodnight sky" he said smiling as he got in and drove away. I walked onto my bus as i saw hayleys text message. Call me. I frowned as i decided id call her in the morning. it was too late and I was tired. I jumped in my bunk and went to sleep immdiately. I woke up the next morning as i turned the Tv on and washed my face. I sat down on my couch and decided to call hayley back.

"skyler?" she asked

"hey. sorry i was really tired last night so i didnt call" i said

"yeahh... Um I have a question" she said

"okay go" i said

"did you hook up with john mayer?" she asked as i laughed shocked

"what? howd you..." i said when i heard the tv.

"john mayer and Skyler Flagger spotted outside holding hands as they stepped inside his car together" the announcer said

"noo! I just met him yesterday when tegan dan josh and I went out! he came over to dans bus and we all hung nothing more!" i said

"are you sure?" she asked

"Im positive. He didnt even come onto my bus. He only asked for my number jesus. The paparrazi kill me" i said

"ohh...okay good." she said

"You really thought Id hooked up with him?" i asked

"well i didnt know." she said

"yeah, well ill talk to you later I got stuff to do" i siad

"alright bye" she said as we both hung up. I got dressed for the day finishing just as someone knocked on ym door. I answered it as tegan smiled

"hey" she said as i let her in

"whats up?" i asked pulling this shirt off to change into another. 

"have you seen the news?" she asked

"yeah yeah. I knwo appernelty john hooked up with me and I didnt even know" i said sarcastically as she laughed walking over to the abthroom I was now finishing my makeup in.

"hey after pratice wanna come to the club with us?" she asked

"sure. " i said finishing up as we walked to my living room area. She sat down as i laid on the couch my head in her lap.

"Im so glad I dont have a hangover. I drank so much last night" i said as she laughed

"yeahh well your one of the lucky ones. I knew I shouldnt of had those shots." tegan said playing with my hair

"haha sucks for you" i said as she looked at me.

"Dont give me that look" i said smirking

"what look?" she asked

"that one you just gave me" i said as she laughed

"I cant help the looks i give" she said as i rolled my eyes. "whatever." i said as she as she smirked. I bit the side of my lip slightly as she looked away blushing.

"look at you blushing. havent seen those rosey cheeks in forever" i said softly touching her hot cheeks. I laughed pretending they burned me as she pushed me playfully

"Whatever, I do have emotions" she said

"noo way. I thought you were a walking talking love making machine" I said as she rolled her eyes

"I cant help that I like to be satisfied whether thats with the same person is totally optional" she said as i laughed getting up as she followed.

"what time is it?" i asked

"almost noon. Better head out for pratice" she said as i nodded. We walked off my bus together and praticed with our bands at diffrent areas along with everyone else. The maine was touring with us too. It was pretty awesome. i hadnt gotteen to meet them yet though. I was finishing some songs as john O'callaghan walked over

"skyler right?" he asked 

"hey, finally we meet in person" i said as he smiled sweetly

"i knwo right? Weve been dying to see one of your shows now we all get to every night" he said as i laughed

"thanks" I said flattered as tegan called me

"hey you coming?" tegan called

"uhh yeah" i said as i turned back to john

"hey were going to a club do you and your band wanna come with?" i asked

"thatd be awesome but kennedy jared, pat and garrett are doing a bit of recording so itd only be me" he said

"thats cool. come on" i said as he nodded adn we walked voer to waiting tegan. She smiled

"Hey im john from the Maine" he said

"tegan from tegan and sara. Nice to meet you you guys ready?" she asked

"for sure, wheres dan and josh?" i asked

"theyre gonna meet us there with matt and max and chris" she said as i nodded. We caught a cab that took us to the club. We were let in with no trouble in front of everyone else and walked inside the awesome club. We went into the VIB section where the guys where drinking soda and sitting down talking

"hey guys" i said smiling as they smiled

"this is john O'callaghan, hes from the Maine" i said

"awesome dude. we havent gotten to meet your band formally, Im josh thats matt, chris, max and dan were you me at six" josh said smiling as they all shook hands. We all sat down ordering drinking and talking having a good time as it got later.

"lets go dance before the club cloes" i said getting up as I walked into the crowd. I saw josh follow me as everyone else got up too to dance. 

"Im glad your not sad anymore" josh said in my ear as we dance

"I didnt say im not sad. Im just trying ot move on" i said back as he noded then pulled me closer as i plced my arms on his shoulders

"so what now since your single??" he asked

"I dont know actually. I can do what I want i guess but i dont wanna be like a slut sleeping with people night and day" i said as he laughed

"your far from a slut no worries" he said as i looked up.

"Your british accent is adorbale! gahh" i said as he laughed

"just noticed?" he asked

"no!" i said slapping his chest as we changed our rythmn to the new song

"I just like listening to you talk" i said as he laughed

"So you nad john mayer" josh said as i lauged

"nooo. He asked for my number thats it. I dont know how the paparrazzi get these crazy ideas. we just met and he hasnt even called me" i said frowning

"his loss." He said

"idont know if id date him. Not this soon or anything. I told you I dont wanna be like a slut" I said

"I told you. Your far from a slut skyler" Josh said as we danced

"You say this but you dont knwo everything. I dont wanna jump from guy to guy" i said

"well a kiss doesnt count as being slutty does it?" he asked as i thought about it.

"no. A kiss is just.. a kiss" i said as he looked at me

"so if someone kissed you you wouldnt object" he asked as i laughed

"depends who. I dont know if you brits know this or not but we americans jusually dont go around accepting kisses from random strangers" i said as he smiled then leaned down and kissed me before I knew what to do. I was a bit lost. I kissed him back lightly as we parted.

"what was that?" i asked

"A non slutty kiss" he said as i laughed resting my head on his chest as we danced. The song finished and I was whisked away by the guys to leave. We all left as a group as i laughed and joked around with them all.

"does anyone wanna give me a piggy back ride?" i asked as they all laughed

"ill be nice. Jump on" dan said as i smiled

"see this is why I like you the best" i said as he bent down for me to jump on his back. We walked back to the venue well I was carried but it was fun as we all parted our sepreate ways except tegan who I invited to spend the night. 

She came over to my house as i laid on the couch listenging to music. Anberlin was the ebst ever! She walked on as i smiled. Tegan came and sat by me on the couch I was sprawled out on. 

"im totally digging this party life" i said as she laughed

"just dont lose yourself in it" she warned as i nodded remebering the old days and what had happened

"never" i said as I laid my head on her lap. We talked for awhile as she asked about john

"which one?" i asked

"the maine john" Tegan said

"ohh hes cool" i said not really paying attention.

"soo. Tonight josh kissed me" i said as she looked at me laughing

"i knew the little brit had a thing for you" she said

"no. It was just a kiss. Nothing more. We even laughed about it" i said

"thats like saying if I kissed you it would be nothing" tegan said as i sat up

"thats not the same" i said

"how?" tegan said

"because. We have a past and whenever we kiss it always leads to more" i said as she laughed

"yeah yeah" tegan said as i leaned my head on her. She hugged me closer as our eyes met.

"hey wanna make one big bed like the old days?" i asked as she laughed nodding We made a bed right in the backroom sa i brought my playing ipod stero. We both laid down changed into our pajamas as we talked as dismantle repair came on. I stopped talking as did she as we both listened to the song. I looked at her as the chorus came on. I felt tegans lips against mine as we kissed hard. This song had so much meaning between us. She held my face as i held her tightly. We kissed harder i missed her kisses so much. She pulled away as we both gasped for air forgetting to breath. I got ontop of her as we kissed again. She lightly put her hands on my waist as we kissed harder to the song. I pulled away slipping my shirt off leaving my tanktop. She slipped her pants off as we kissed harder. I embraced every part of her body leaving nothing untouched. We kissed harder as i realized we were both completely naked. I could care less at this point. I kissed her neck as sheflipped my over getting ontop as i slightly parted my legs for her. She leanedin kissing me as i felt her inside of me. I gasped then moaned as she pushed further. We kissed again as she kept going. It was a familiar feeling I had missed over the years. I was so hot as she made me climax. I couldnt even tell what song was playing because we were so intesely concetrated on each other. She finished as we both laid breathing hard as i looked at her. She looked back as me kissing me softly

"ive missed you so much" tegan whispered as i smiled

I didnt know what to say at this point but i didnt have to, tegan kissed me harder.

It was about 3 am when we went to bed exsausted and too tired to think of what just happened. 

The next morning I woke up with tegan behind me holding me close. I stired as she kissed my neck

"Stay still sky" she said groggily as i went through what happened last night. I got out of the makeshift bed wed made and found my clothes.

"skyyy get your ass back over here... I miss you" tegan said laughing as  finished getting dressed. 

"skyler?" tegan asked sitting up as she covered herself with the blankets

"what are you doing?" she asked as i couldnt meet her eyes

"I..." But had nothing to say. I found some flip flops and quickly went for the door but tegan stepped infront of me with a t-shirt on. 

"what are you doing?" she asked confused and irraited as i felt her arms come around me

"dont" i said softly as i pulled away

"what the hell is your problem?" she asked me

"Tegan. What happened last night... Lets just forget about it" i said turing as she caughtme

"what? Are you kidding me? How could you forget something like that? Are you losing your mind? Skyler. Were meant to be together" she said holding my cheeks to kiss me but i moved my head

"No tegan. I... I cant do this" i said walking away as i ran off the venue to a coffee shop. I sat stiring my drink as i sulked. I felt horrible. I felt disgusting. But most of all I felt guilty. Taylor was right for having suspicioins with me and tegan and being upset. Im a horrible person for not telling him, I was a slut, and taylor deserved someone so much better then me. I frowned harder as i pushed back tears. What did I do.....