#sleepytvglow

[forgottensuggestion]

i’m buzzed

i was frantically looking through my phone

looking through years of pictures on my google drive

i wanted to see if i still had your nudes saved on my phone

i read something i wrote in my notes back in 2013

its exactly how i feel still today

i remember that night

you fell asleep on my chest, shirt off

your hairy chest soaked in moonlight and sweat

your nipples, god your nipples

my favorite color

i want to kiss them again

i don’t miss you

i just want you under me

[forgottensuggestion]

Watching someone play video games is like watching a movie but in this movie, the character will listen if you tell them what to do to avoid dying

So i watch free movies daily And i make money to keep this little adjustment going

I used to feel like we had a good thing here But I’m starting to feel terrified

What’s my end game? I miss the days where i only had to worry about virtual reality ending You’re the only video game I know of

[forgottensuggestion]

Do you remember?

That night at your house I turned the light back on I’m not sure what I saw Were you scared of us breaking up again? Were you bored of monogamy yet again, even just an hour back into it? Were you imagining someone else in my place? We were both nude You on the bed, sitting up, looking at me My hand still on the switch, standing at the door, looking at you I put my clothes back on “I’ll be back, I’m gonna get the lube” You looked at my phone The screen was on, playing atlas sound off youtube “Okay” I went to the car I came back through the front door I heard silence I walked quietly into the hallway I heard the music again I walked in the room I heard music and your silence I felt the gravity in the room I knew exactly what I saw when I turned on the light earlier My phone was flipped over, in a different spot. You saw my messages, the way I really felt. “I wish we spent Christmas together” I saw loneliness, things we didn’t experience together, sex with strangers, holiday wishes we didn’t bond over, bridges we didn’t cross It was traces of everything pouring out of you, lit up like sad flickering christmas lights Your grindr notification went off I looked at you I turned the light off You poured into me in the dark Multi colored liquids lining my small intestines like LED rainbows Temporary decorations I knew it’d be the last time

[forgottensuggestion]

my face in the mirror looks less tired than it actually feels in real life these days trains pass by my house everyday and toot their own horns but i have nothing to brag about except for the time i was able to kiss you when i’d been thinking of you nightly nobodied wishes are ever denied at 11:11 supposedly

i’ve broken every watch i’ve ever owned though but still i try to tell time with my own shadow under the streetlights i wish for that first chance to come back and not happen again i’m usually drunk when 11:11 comes around so i can’t call on it “its always skin thirty in my bed for you "was a stupid joke but i was just trying to make you laugh you were crying so much i didn’t know it was because you were visiting other beds i lost you to other, better time tellers