i was tagged by @feeisamarshmallow to share six facts about myself! i feel like i talk constantly about myself and overshare a ton on here all the time so most people probably know this but i’ll try!! under the cut because i wrote loads, haha.
1. i have never ever smoked a cigarette in my life and i feel like i never could. my parents raised me with a mindset that that was the grossest, most terrible thing you could ever do and if i ever smoked they would kick me out. i almost think they were slightly too harsh, because when i saw my friend smoke at a party at age 17 we had an actual fight about it because i’d genuinely been raised to believe that smoking makes you a bad person. i definitely don’t think it’s that simple today haha, but i do still think it’s absolutely disgusting and i’ll never understand it.
2. i like to tell people i’m a lazy vegetarian, because i’ll sometimes eat things like fish or mcdonalds chicken nuggets or non-vegetarian candy, but the truth is that i make sure not to have those restrictions because restricting what i can and can’t eat will always be an eating-disordered behavior for me and i never want to go back to that hellhole again. i do eat mostly vegetarian but that’s genuinely because that’s what i like best (and also because red meat gets SO gross once you stop eating it).
3. i’ve had a special interest in everything babies and pregnancy literally since i learned to read when i was three or four! i suppressed it a lot in my early teens because i realized that people found it weird and i internalized that shame but today i love how much i know about it and it makes me so happy! i’ve read that girls with autism are more likely to have special interests related to biology and the body and that was definitely true for me hehehe
4. if you search my full name there are debate articles out there that i wrote and got published when i was 14-15 and they’re SO TERRIBLE and i’m so ashamed of them and i even tried emailing the site to have them removed but they won’t do that because they own it and yada-yada. the opinions are fine, the writing quality isn’t, and i cringe even thinking about them. but at the same time, writing them was part of my eating disorder recovery and learning how to put my identity in something else for the first time after two and a half years, so i feel like i can’t hate them too much either.
fun fact: one of the articles was about how terrible alcohol is (i was involved in a youth sobriety organisation at that time) and a popular twitter comedian at the time retweeted it and made a snarky comment that “johanna 15 has never tried X and X alcohol hahaha”. she was right but still. anyway she’s quite well-known in sweden now but i REFUSE to support her in anything she does because she once called me out on twitter when i was fifteen and i still think that was low of her lol sorry i’m just too petty
5. i can’t do winged eyeliner!!! i have hooded lids and shaky hands!!! but there was a period of time when everyone did it and it was SO popular and i had a friend who was great at it, so i would force myself almost every day to try to get that perfect eyeliner wing and i would have to redo and redo it and i would stand in front of the mirror with intense anxiety and makeup remover for thirty minutes some days before giving up. it was honestly really sad
6. i’ve always had loads of problems with my ears and i had to have a “total reconstruction” in one of them where they’ve basically rebuilt my eardrum in some way? and something smaller on the other side as well. the total reconstruction was an eight-hour surgery when i was eleven years old where they removed cysts that were growing there and i learned years later that the reason it took so long was because one cyst was growing on a facial nerve, and if they had made one wrong move (or let it grow) half of my face could have been paralyzed. but they didn’t and today i still can’t hear well but i don’t have cysts in my ears either and that’s progress!!!
okay this was actually fun haha 🥰 thanks so much fee!!! i’ll tag @loudamy, @andysambrg, @amydancepants-peralta, @johnny-and-dora, @fivefeetapart, @letsperaltiago and @amazingsantiago if you want to but no pressure as always <33
