Today, I answered some questions for an article! Here are my answers! ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️
* When were you diagnosed with an eating disorder (ED) and what type of ED were you diagnosed with?
* I was firstly diagnosed with Disordered eating at the age of 16. (2015) - Later that year I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa. (2015 - present)
* What support did you receive to facilitate recovery from your ED and did you find it helpful?
* I have received inpatient and outpatient treatment. Inpatient treatment being, medical monitoring, nasogastric feeding, and IV and oral treatments. Outpatient treatment being, (Medical monitoring) weekly OBS, blood pressure, & weight. Weekly Dietican, and psychology. I found it quite isolating when being inpatient, as my phone was taken from me. I felt as though, I was somewhat being punished for an illness I couldn’t help. Unable to really communicate or see my support system much. Eg family & friends. It seemed it was a HUGE focus on become physically better, and not understanding why a relapse was occurring and understanding the “ED side of my brain” And why I fell sick. I believe more psychology and therapy whilst inpatient for refeeding. Would have benefited myself, and those suffering also immensely. It may possibly have stopped me from going round and round in relapses. Of getting physically better, being discharged, being well for a while, and then readmitted more poorly.
*Do believe an individual can fully recover from an eating disorder?
* This is a difficult question. I personally believe with the correct support, guidance and courage, that yes indeed you can fully recover from an eating disorder. It most certainly is going to have ups and downs. But I hold onto hope.
* How do you define recovery from an eating disorder?
* I define recovery from an eating disorder, when I feel as though I am 100% free from the “ED VOICE” in my head, and I am not actively engaging in disordered behaviours. When I learn to love myself and life. And when my days and nights don’t revolve around anorexia.
* Do you/ when did you view yourself as recovered?
* I would have to say honestly, I am not recovered as of yet. And I have finally understood that it’s okay. I keep trying, I keep fighting, and take each day as it comes. I have a very amazing support team. And I am finally allowing them to take back some of the control that “ANA” has had hold of for so long. I am looking forward to the day I do recover fully!
* In your personal experience, how does recovery look for an individual who has experienced an eating disorder?
* For me, it’s not a glamorous thing at all. It’s tears, and arguments, and giving up. It’s pushing away everything and everyone trying to help you. It’s raw, it’s lonely, and it’s dark. And it’s consuming. It’s terrifying. But there is always hope. And a glimmer of love and light.
* Do you think that someone needs to be free of all behaviours associated with their ED to be considered recovered?
* Me personally yes. I always remind myself of my younger self. How happy, healthy and full of life she was. I cannot wait till the time she’s back! And not consumed and focused on taking up as little space possible, instead of flourishing and growing.
* - Do you think a past ED sufferer can be considered recovered if they still occasionally experience intrusive thoughts or struggle with body image?
* I do believe you can be recovered and still have tough thoughts. Unfortunately we live in a world full of advertisements, magazines, and images of how we “should look” what we should “wear” what we should “eat” I have always been a perfectionist, and compared myself to “unrealistic” images for a long time. So in answering this question, I do believe we can have bad thoughts about our body image, even when recovered. Every person will have these thoughts. It’s a fine line. It’s understanding when it’s becoming bad again. Engaging in unhealthy behaviours, and having consuming thoughts. And reaching out for help.
* - Do you yourself ever grapple with these things?
* Of coarse! I most certainly do! On a daily basis!
* In your opinion does relapse differ from sporadically exercising an ED behaviour/s?
* This is a difficult question for sure. For me a relapse is completely out of my control, it’s when my eating disorder has taken all control. And is VERY STRONG AND VERY LOUD. When I am doing well. And in a good place, certain behaviours for me, like body checks, reading labels, wanting to buy scales and thoughts of guilt and anxiety will occur. But I have strategies on how to manage these behaviours and thoughts. And I am able to readjust them. And people to help me and talk to. People that have extensive knowledge and understanding.
* Does someone who has recovered from an ED need to implement precautions in life that someone who has not experienced an ED does not?
* Most certainly! I try to stay away from activities that is revolved around weight, image, and unhealthy things. I made the decision to stop ballet. As it was detrimental to me moving forward. I don’t buy magazines with unrealistic, unhealthy and unhelpful people and ideas in them. I am also very careful on my social media whom I follow/engage with. I am very blessed that my family and close friends are understanding of these things. But unfortunately you cannot ever fully implement precautions. There will always be a temptation. To read labels, look at my weight at a friends house etc. Billboards, overheard conversations, chats. But I do try my absolute hardest, to minimise the harm.
