“I don’t have a brain tumor, do I?” Apparently, if you think about fake-fainting during princess lessons to get out of said lessons for the day, it’ll actually happen. She doesn’t feel any pain, really, which means she didn’t hit her head on anything, which is both good and bad—good, because she probably doesn’t have a concussion, and bad, because if she’s cleared to leave, she’ll probably have to go back to princess lessons. Such is the curse of spring break freedom (or lack thereof). “Last week I saw this movie on Lifetime about this woman named Jodie Stanton who kept having fainting episodes and her doctor kept dismissing it as her not getting enough nutrients in her diet because she’s a vegetarian, and then they finally caught it when she got into a car accident and she only had a week left to live. That’s not going to happen to me, right?”