#smurfblogging

[primeministerofantarctica]

"is that the-" "the petrova line sequence from project hail mary (2026) recreated in the smurfs mobile game? yes yes it is :)."

[primeministerofantarctica]

whenever i say i ship hefty and smurfette i feel like i need to add the caveat that it is SPECIFICALLY from the lost village and not whatever heterosexual trash ntob cooked up 😭

[primeministerofantarctica]

istg i've tried to buy peewit in this stupid game three times already and EVERY time the app crashes and i have to go crawling to the support team to get my money back 😭. this doesn't happen with any other paid content i think that boy just hates me specifically

[primeministerofantarctica]

love how most of the smurfs are just "this is a normal guy, who could potentially learn magic if they wanted to" then with timber it's like "yeah this guy can talk to trees. don't question it <3"

[primeministerofantarctica]

who is writing these things 😭

[primeministerofantarctica]

horny bitches on the internet who've never seen the smurfs will draw smurfette with d cups and zero inch waist. WE KNOW THE TRUTH.

[primeministerofantarctica]

hey why is one of the selling points of smurf beer is that it doesn't get you drunk. like i'm not an alcohol drinker myself but isn't the whole point that people who do drink want to get buzzed? like...what's the point in consuming it otherwise?

[primeministerofantarctica]

me: oh, I haven't checked the online smurfs specialty store recently, I wonder if there's any new merch out

the new merch:

me: