me trying to edit the incoherent nonsense i wrote at ass o’clock in the morning:

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me trying to edit the incoherent nonsense i wrote at ass o’clock in the morning:
Reading your old fics like
If you’ve read anything I’ve written before the second half of November 2024, I’m so sorry 💀🙏
You know when you read fanfiction and it's good but it just needs a beta reader SO MUCH
note to myself: i should stop writing stuff when im drunk.
lol righttttttt
if you truly fucking cared about a friendship you wouldn't text me when it was convient for you, you wouldn't text me at 2:00 in the fucking morning. You would actually make an effort cause I'm fucking not anymore.. Im so sick of caring for people who don't give a fuck about me yeah its life this shit happens i need to learn from my mistakes. HAS IT EVER FUCKING OCCURRED TO YOU THERE ARE ACTUALLY NICE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD!!!! probably not.. but i mean i guess ill just have to bite my tongue till i die cause its never gonna change nothings gonna change so fuck it.
work tonight is like basically useless tbh so i've been sitting here for hours with essentially nothing to do and then i was sent a 17 page word document to proofread and i am in HEAVEN
I've had a good week and I've been doing pretty well but I'm feeling really sad tonight and I want it to go away but it won't and I don't know how to tell my mind that things are ok and I'm asking it to stop telling me to kill myself but it won't and I just want to be happy and not always feel the need to drink and smoke and take a lot of pills.