A Leap of Faith and Everything After ✨
There are things I can’t easily put into words. Like a pain you feel but can’t put into words. You can’t point to where it hurts, but you know that it does.
So here it is, I’ll say it plainly. I'm in a chapter of my life where everything feels unbearably heavy. I’m fully aware of it, even if I never thought this season would come so soon. But if not now, when?
Right now, I feel like the most foolish version of myself. I am reckless, impulsive, sometimes immature. And honestly? I don’t even try to deny it anymore. Because at the end of the day, I’m left alone, with all the choices I made, all the regrets I carry, and all the consequences I now have to live with. The decisions are still mine to make, even when I feel lost.
We all know our truth deep down. We know what we’re going through. It's just a matter of whether we face it or avoid it entirely. We feel our own pain, and if we’re honest, we also sense the pain of those we’ve hurt, even when we pretend not to.
Lately, I've been crying most nights. Sleep escapes me. Thoughts of you take up so much space in my head, but I’m trying. I’ve been keeping myself busy—doing things I never imagined I could handle, going places I never thought I’d reach. And in the process, I’ve hurt people too. I’ve said things I didn’t mean. I've acted like someone even I barely recognize. But through all of it, I remind myself: my feelings are valid. The way I hurt was never without reason. It was the aftermath of what you did to me.
Still, I want to thank you.
March 02, 2013 : Kamay ni Hesus, Lucban Quezon PH
Thank you for showing me how to love unconditionally. Thank you for teaching me that sometimes, love means not expecting anything in return. You gave me so much. Experiences, growth, and lessons I’ll carry for life. Even with all the betrayal, I won’t regret a single moment, not even the time I feel I wasted. Because it made me stronger. It made me whole again.
Maybe I wasn’t the one you needed. Maybe I was never the one you wanted to spend your forever with. But I understand now. I truly do.
Moving on from you has been hard. So instead, I’ll just move forward. It’s not that I’ve stopped loving you, because I haven’t, but I won’t stay stuck anymore. I’ve made peace with the fact that my journey continues without you in it. But I’ll take the lessons you left me. That part stays.
Sometimes, the smallest decision leads to the biggest change. And no—you don’t have to have everything figured out to begin again. You’ll make mistakes. You’ll feel like a mess. But progress isn’t always pretty. It’s still progress.
If I’ve learned anything about love, it’s this: it’s hard work. No one person can meet all your needs—but with the right effort and commitment, anything is possible. It’s about listening. It's about meeting halfway. It’s about growing together, even as you grow individually. You need space, independence, and the ability to create your own happiness.
And above all: you have to choose each other. Every single day.
You don’t have to chase love. The right one will find you. And when they do, you won’t need to ask to be treated right—they just will. They’ll learn how you love. They’ll speak your language, even when you haven’t said a word.
So take that leap, even when it’s terrifying. Even when it breaks you open.
Let your faith be bigger than your fear.