a realization
so lately I’ve been feeling discouraged over the lack of response of my fic. I also run a poetry blog and page, and that too wasn’t as active as I expected. For a moment I felt giving up, until my friends reminded me why am I here in the first place. Then I realized as an author, only I truly know my work 100%. I know how much thought, time and effort I placed in writing those parts and the songs. I know what I have in store, what I have in mind is something I would love to see as a reader myself. I cannot expect a huge, immediate reaction (though some fics do, and I can’t help but find myself comparing them to mine, asking what did they do to garner such attention when I didn’t).
But I realized: they do not know the full story. They do not know what I have in mind. They only know the premise, which may not appeal to some, but they do not know what’s in store is something they’ve never seen before. They don’t know that even if it may just be a fanfic, even if it has beloved already familiar characters, I wrote it with the thought that even those who aren’t in the fandom may understand. For me to judge my work as crap based on kudos and numbers alone is unfair, especially when I know why the reader in me tells me it isn’t.
and if it is, well only time will tell once I finished writing the story.
But for now, I must go on, I must push myself even if voices of doubt tell me to stop. In the end, what matters is that I’ve written the fic the reader in me wants to read. Otherwise, they can just all scram.
