if the dull substance of my flesh!!! were thought!!! injurious distance should not stop my way!!! for then!!! despite of space!!! i would be brought from limits far remote where thou!!! dost!!! stay!!! no matter then!!! although my foot did stand upon the farthest earth removed from thee!!! for nimble thought can jump BOTH sea and land as soon as THINK the place where he would be!!! but AH!!!!!!! thought KILLS ME that i am not thought!!! to leap large!!! lengths!!! of miles!!! when thou art gone!!! but that!!! so much of earth and water wrought!!! i must attend time's leisure with!!! my!!! moan!!! recieving nought by elements so slow but heavy tears!!! badges!!! of!!! either's!!! woe!!!
We don’t actually know when William Shakespeare was born -- We know, thanks to Church records that he was Baptized on the 26th of April (when he was a few days old, probably), and that he died on the 23rd of April. And our fondness for everything turning out even prompts us to celebrate his Birthday on this day, too.
So have some of my favorite Shakespeare things:
Ben Crystal’s TEDx Talk at Bergen, Norway (2017) Auto-generated captions:
Sonnet 44 (Text on screen):
The “Kill Claudio” scene from Much Ado about Nothing (auto-generated captions):
This is the scene that is the turning point of the play, when Benedick, who’s been scornful of romantic love, and even flippant and nonchalant with platonic friendship, finally commits his loyalty to someone.
Full lines from Shakespeare’s script (Act 4, scene 1: lines 269-350) below the cut (a few lines were cut from the filmed scene):
BENEDICK Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?
BEATRICE Yea, and I will weep a while longer.
BENEDICK I will not desire that.
BEATRICE You have no reason. I do it freely.
BENEDICK Surely I do believe your fair cousin is
wronged.
BEATRICE Ah, how much might the man deserve of me
that would right her!
BENEDICK Is there any way to show such friendship?
BEATRICE A very even way, but no such friend.
BENEDICK May a man do it?
BEATRICE It is a man’s office, but not yours.
BENEDICK I do love nothing in the world so well as
you. Is not that strange?
BEATRICE As strange as the thing I know not. It were as
possible for me to say I loved nothing so well as you,
but believe me not, and yet I lie not; I confess
nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my
cousin.
BENEDICK By my sword, Beatrice, thou lovest me!
BEATRICE Do not swear and eat it.
BENEDICK I will swear by it that you love me, and I will
make him eat it that says I love not you.
BEATRICE Will you not eat your word?
BENEDICK With no sauce that can be devised to it. I
protest I love thee.
BEATRICE Why then, God forgive me.
BENEDICK What offense, sweet Beatrice?
BEATRICE You have stayed me in a happy hour. I was
about to protest I loved you.
BENEDICK And do it with all thy heart.
BEATRICE I love you with so much of my heart that
none is left to protest.
BENEDICK Come, bid me do anything for thee.
BEATRICE Kill Claudio.
BENEDICK Ha! Not for the wide world.
BEATRICE You kill me to deny it. Farewell.
[She begins to exit.]
BENEDICK Tarry, sweet Beatrice.
BEATRICE I am gone, though I am here. There is no
love in you. Nay, I pray you let me go.
BENEDICK Beatrice—
BEATRICE In faith, I will go.
BENEDICK We’ll be friends first.
BEATRICE You dare easier be friends with me than
fight with mine enemy.
BENEDICK Is Claudio thine enemy?
BEATRICE Is he not approved in the height a villain
that hath slandered, scorned, dishonored my kinswoman?
O, that I were a man! What, bear her in
hand until they come to take hands, and then, with
public accusation, uncovered slander, unmitigated
rancor—O God, that I were a man! I would eat his
heart in the marketplace.
BENEDICK Hear me, Beatrice—
BEATRICE Talk with a man out at a window! A proper
saying.
BENEDICK Nay, but Beatrice—
BEATRICE Sweet Hero, she is wronged, she is slandered,
she is undone.
BENEDICK Beat—
BEATRICE Princes and counties! Surely a princely testimony,
a goodly count, Count Comfect, a sweet
gallant, surely! O, that I were a man for his sake! Or
that I had any friend would be a man for my sake!
But manhood is melted into curtsies, valor into
compliment, and men are only turned into tongue,
and trim ones, too. He is now as valiant as Hercules
that only tells a lie and swears it. I cannot be a man
with wishing; therefore I will die a woman with
grieving.
BENEDICK Tarry, good Beatrice. By this hand, I love
thee.
BEATRICE Use it for my love some other way than
swearing by it.
BENEDICK Think you in your soul the Count Claudio
hath wronged Hero?
BEATRICE Yea, as sure as I have a thought or a soul.
BENEDICK Enough, I am engaged. I will challenge
him. I will kiss your hand, and so I leave you. By
this hand, Claudio shall render me a dear account.
As you hear of me, so think of me. Go comfort your
cousin. I must say she is dead, and so farewell.
Sonnet 44 by William Shakespeare (read by Sir Patrick Stewart)
If the dull substance of my flesh were thought,
Injurious distance should not stop my way;
For then despite of space I would be brought,
From limits far remote, where thou dost stay.
No matter then although my foot did stand
Upon the farthest earth removed from thee;
For nimble thought can jump both sea and land
As soon as think the place where he would be.
But ah! thought kills me that I am not thought,
To leap large lengths of miles when thou art gone,
But that, so much of earth and water wrought,
I must attend time's leisure with my moan,
Receiving nought by elements so slow
But heavy tears, badges of either's woe.
Press’d by the Moon, mute arbitress of tides,
While the loud equinox its pow’r combines,
The sea no more its swelling surge confines,
But o’er the shrinking land sublimely rides.
The wild blasts, rising from the Western cave,
Drives the huge billows from their heaving bed;
Tears from their grassy tombs the village dead,
And breaks the silent sabbath of the grave!
With shells and seaweed mingled, on the shore,
Lo! their bones whiten in the frequent wave;
But vain to them the winds and waters rave;
They hear the warring elements no more:
While I am doom’d—by life’s long storm opprest,
To gaze with envy, on their gloomy rest.
Sonnet 44 by William Shakespeare (read by Sir John Gielgud)
If the dull substance of my flesh were thought,
Injurious distance should not stop my way;
For then despite of space I would be brought,
From limits far remote, where thou dost stay.
No matter then although my foot did stand
Upon the farthest earth removed from thee;
For nimble thought can jump both sea and land
As soon as think the place where he would be.
But ah! thought kills me that I am not thought,
To leap large lengths of miles when thou art gone,
But that, so much of earth and water wrought,
I must attend time's leisure with my moan,
Receiving nought by elements so slow
But heavy tears, badges of either's woe.
If the dull substance of my flesh were thought,
Injurious distance should not stop my way;
For then, despite of space, I would be brought
From limits far remote, where thou dost stay.
No matter then although my foot did stand
Upon the farthest earth removed from thee,
For nimble thought can jump both sea and land
As soon as think the place where he would be.
But ah, thought kills me that I am not thought,
To leap large lengths of miles when thou art gone,
But that, so much of earth and water wrought,
I must attend time's leisure with my moan,
Receiving naught by elements so slow
But heavy tears, badges of either's woe.
If the dull substance of my flesh were thought,
Injurious distance should not stop my way;
For then despite of space I would be brought,
From limits far remote, where thou dost stay.
No matter then although my foot did stand
Upon the farthest earth removed from thee;
For nimble thought can jump both sea and land
As soon as think the place where he would be.
But ah! thought kills me that I am not thought,
To leap large lengths of miles when thou art gone,
But that, so much of earth and water wrought,
I must attend time's leisure with my moan,
Receiving nought by elements so slow
But heavy tears, badges of either's woe.
