#sorry bitches

[radioroxx]

bitches love odile near death sprite. bitches love odile

[prollybradshaw]

20 Years

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Reader (Non-Descriptive Reader, no use of Y/N)

Word Count: 1.1k

TW: So much angst, no comfort, sucidial ideation

Summary: You’ve loved Bradley for 20 years, and he never noticed.

Authors note: sorry ya’ll. I like to torture myself and you🤷🏻‍♀️

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“Until you have experienced the pain of falling in love with someone who doesn’t love you, you have not come across true hurt and despair.”

Year 1

You’ll always remember the first time you saw him. You accidentally bumped into him your first day in the Navy. You murmured a sorry, and he just smiled down at you before walking away. He was only 20 at the time, his hair darker and his face clean shaven.

He didn’t remember you after that, so you just admired him from afar. He was the guy all the girls wanted. When he walked into the room everyone noticed. When you walked into the room no one batted an eye.

You tried to tell yourself you didn’t care about him, until the day he finally spoke to you. He was tall, and his god damn eyes were even more beautiful up close.

“Hey I’m Bradley.” He’d said to you, with a big grin on his face.

As if you didn’t already know who he was.

“You’re Amy’s friend, right? I was wondering if I could grab her number from you?”

You smiled and gave him her number, no questions asked. 

You tried to pretend the ache in your chest wasn’t because of him.

Year 2

You became flying partners. You were his back seater, and now he had to notice you. But somehow, he still didn’t see you. At least he didn’t see you how you saw him.

When you looked at him you saw oceans and valleys, galaxies and planets. When he looked at you, he saw- nothing important.

You grew close to him being his WSO. You told eachother everything when you were in the sky. Secrets that would never be revealed. 

Each time you were flying with him you were falling deeper into the hole you’d dug for yourself.  

You pretended you weren’t falling in love.

Year 5

 He met someone, and he loved her. It was killing you to watch him with someone else. 

You wanted to tell him that you were miserably in love with him. You wanted to tell him that you couldn’t sleep at night knowing he was happy kissing someone else. 

You had to stop going out when she was there. The worst part is he didn’t notice you were gone.

Year 7

 You cried alone most nights. Your friends told you to start putting yourself out there, go on some dates. But you’d tried that for years, nothing ever panned out.

“Why haven’t I met any of the guys you go out with. I know you’ve got one!” he’d say, a big grin on his face. He would always wrap his arm around your shoulder while he talked to you.

“You know that’s not true Bradshaw.” You’d say back. You wanted to tell him – I can’t seem to find someone as good as you, you fucking idiot.

“No guy is good enough for you anyway.”

You wanted to laugh at the irony. 

But instead, you spent hours wondering if you should have told him you loved him. The pain of loving him when you couldn’t have him was consuming you.

Year 10

 When he told you he proposed you smiled and told him congratulations. You told him you’d be there, whatever he needed.

You went home and sobbed until your throat was raw and mind was numb.

You had to distance yourself from him after that. He asked where you’d been once. You told him you met someone, and he believed you.

Year 12

 You saw him and his wife at a friend’s wedding. He had aged like fine wine, he looked more handsome than he did the first day you met him. 

He was so god damn happy so you tried to be happy too. But you swore you could see pity in his eyes. You were 32 after all- single, no kids.

“How are you doing? It’s been a while.” He’d say, his eyes trying to hide their concern.

“Great, just going where the Navy tells me.” Drowning yourself in your career helped to distract from the loneliness.

You couldn’t talk to him like you used to. It hurt too much. 

He played the piano that night, just like old times. You left early so he wouldn’t see the tears streaming down your face.

Year 15 

 You had worked so hard to move on. You met someone, someone who noticed you. He loved you, treated you well. You were happy, really. But he wasn’t Bradley.

Year 20

Bradley called you to wish you a happy 20 years in the Navy. You thanked him and told him the same- you tried to hide that you were tipsy from the whiskey bottle in your hand . 

He asked how you were, and you told him you were great- that everything was going well for you.

You lied to him - because how could you tell him the truth? 

 You were completley and uttery alone, with nothing but the Navy as your companion. You’d never been able to find someone that could keep up with the moving parts of being in the Navy. 

You’d gotten used to it.

“I miss you.” He said. And you shook your head in disbelief.

“Don’t say that.” You said back, your voice filled with sadness.

“Why? It’s true.”

But he didn’t miss you how you missed him. He didn’t think of you that way- he never had. 

The antidepressants on your kitchen counter looked tempting. You knew you could take a handful – go to sleep for a while. No one would notice- just like how he never cared enough to notice you.

“Bradley I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you.” The alcohol was getting to you, and the recklessness and sadness you felt were a dangerous mix.

“And you never noticed.” You bit out. “Not even once.” Your voice was laced with anger. You were trying so fucking hard not to cry.

All you could hear was Bradley’s quiet breaths through the phone.

“I’m so fucking happy that you’re happy.” You took another sip of the whiskey. 

“But I hate you for it. I hate that I can’t blame you for not loving me. I hate that you found someone, and that I’m still here wishing it had been me.”

You were breathing heavily now with tears streaming down your face. You set the bottle down on the ground and looked up at the ceiling.

“I’m so sorry.” He said. His voice cracked with sadness. You wondered if pity was what he truly felt.

Before he could speak again you hung up the phone.

He had a wife, kids- family. He didn’t need your love confessions or drama. You were both 40 years old for fucks sake.

You imagined that first day you saw him. How happy and naïve you both had been. You closed your eyes and leaned up against the wall, sliding down to the hardwood floor. 

You could hear the vibrations of your cellphone through your muted hearing. You ignored them and settled deeper into the darkness.

You dreamt of another life where you were with him. Where he noticed you- where he thought you were special, something more than a friend.

 He kissed you so sweet in your dreams – something you’d always craved but would never have.

Soon the alcohol would be gone, sleep would leave you – and you’d be back to wishing you could have done more.

[urbigbadbro]

[The constellation 'Secretive Plotter' is interested in the story of incarnation 'Kim Dokja'.]

[spenpy]

there is a 100000000000000000% chance this exact tails gets trolled scenario has been done before exactly like this but i dont even care, im ready to die le,ts do this

[rat-femurs]

having younger siblings is like. its like if anything happened to these particular 100lbs of flesh I would literally set fire to everyone I know so yes I'm going to hold your hand when we cross the road until you're 15 years old

[sweet-teeth-mfs]

You start with his tie. 

It feels almost wet in your hands, the silk is so fluid. Your fingers grasp around it and Jaehyun reaches for it on instinct. “Let me,” he says, trying to take over, but you tut his hands away. He looks at you quizzically, but when you wrap the tie around your fist and pull him closer to you his expression suddenly changes to a lazy smirk as he leans in, happily offering up his lips. Seeing this, you pull away at the last second.

“Are you that sure I want to fuck you?” you ask, smiling at him as you let go of his tie and put your hands on your hips, stepping away from him ever so slightly, looking far more offended than you feel. 

He’s sitting on the edge of the desk, legs spread lazily over the side. He laughs, shocked a little by your directness but also clearly admiring the fact that you called him out. His hands reach for your hips to bring you closer, and you’re so amused by his casually sexy demeanour that you allow it, pouting at him in mock offense all the while. He sticks out his thigh and slots it between your legs as he pulls you to him. You lean into this makeshift perch and instantly feel the way he’s ever so gently pushing against you; a soft rhythm playing only in his mind. You hum lightly, almost to yourself, as your hands take up his tie again.

“So...does that often work for you then?” you ask, trying to focus on the undoing the knot, not on where his leg is. Slipping your fingers under his collar to pull the length of the tie free, you accidentally brush his cheekbones as you move your hands away, his eyes following yours constantly.

“I don’t try it often,” he admits, brushing a stray strand of hair out of your eyes. “...I’m not that kind of guy,”  he says as his fingers caress your face with the lightest touch, practically a mimic of your earlier action.

“...Are you mocking me Jae?” you laugh, smiling at him, feeling his hands land gently on your ass; pulling you even further into his lap. You relax into him, his face so close, just slightly upturned to yours as you stand in front of him. He stares at you intently and you know that you’re going to have to do your very best not to completely fall for him. This could make work difficult. 

You chuckle nervously, trying to shake off a blush rising in your cheeks. He’s a complete player, you think to yourself, then, but I do love to play. 

You nod your head absentmindedly, agreeing with yourself and committing. You smile, wrapping his jacket lapels in your hands as you’re about to peel him out of it; but he automatically rolls into the motion ahead of you. Instead of you undressing him, he shrugs his shoulder just so, and his jacket falls half off of his body - in a clearly practiced gesture. 

You are both completely silent. Him; half undressed, hands on your ass and thigh wedged in between your legs. You; perched on his leg, holding his lapels still, a look of pure bemusement painted across your face. 

He looks down to the jacket then back up to you, his hair falling in his eyes. He has the decency to look at least a little bit ashamed of himself. 

“....What?” he asks.  

-Ask for Anon (M), for a “celebratory 1 Month anniversary of this blog” request, w/ Jung Jaehyun, of NCT 127. 

[steinesart]

I’m Gon 

[xlijahsgirl]

Merry Christmas 💕

MERRY CHRISTMAS GIRLS AND BOYS xx

I hope you guys have wonderful days filled with love, presents, and food. Especially food, since this is the best of Christmas.

This is actually not about Christmas, but about the Advents Calendar, I started here on Tumblr.

I have the biggest writer block of the year and it makes me kind of angry because it's something I really hate. I still love the idea, but I don't think I am the perfect person to do it since there is a lot going on in my life right now and writing with a writer block or no motivation is me putting no hard work and love in it.

This is just for you, to tell me if you want me to let it on Tumblr and continue it later, let it on Tumblr and leave it alone or delete it since it reminds me of my failure.

I hope you guys are not mad at me since I hate it when people are mad at me. It freaks me out and I keep thinking that I did something terribly wrong.

Spreading love all over the world. I hope you have a person to share these beautiful days with. I spend it with a Pop figure of Remus (thx to my friends, who must really know and love me) while listening to the 5 minutes Harry Potter podcast of coldmirror on Youtube.

Love you all,

xlijahsgirl aka Leah

@preciousgalvan @sour-kangaroo1998 @kapolisradomthoughts  @witchescherry @starlitmoony @megbaldy @ridingmoxley

Advent Calendar Tag-List: @sunshine51879 @slythxr