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May 29, 2020

wooyoung x jealous!reader

word count: 9k

angst (warning: infidelity)

request

you had always trusted your intuition. because while you weren’t very book smart, just getting by with b’s and c’s in most of your classes, you found it incredibly easy to read people.

their eyes were always a dead giveaway. whether they were able to look you in the face or not, if they were twinged with happiness and amusement or tight with fear and apprehension.

wooyoung’s eyes were the thing that first caught your attention, the older boy you’d seen so many times in the hallways or in the cafeteria laughing with his friends or looking around happily. but on this one particular day, he plopped down next to you during lunch and completely caught you off guard.

“hey,” he said casually, like this wasn’t the first time he’d ever spoken to you or acknowledged your existence. you looked at him warily, smiling in confusion as you waved at him hesitantly.

“hi.”

“you’re cute,” he told you bluntly, smiling in a way you know should be getting your heart and stomach fluttering. but you couldn’t help but feel skeptical of the boy, raising your eyebrow at him in confusion.

“okay...” you said, the smirk on his face at the hesitation in your voice far too handsome and charming.

“usually, someone would say oh, thank you or you too,” he says, his eyes widening playfully as his eyebrows shoot up teasingly. but you don’t want any part in what he’s trying to offer you, knowing far too well an older boy like him wouldn’t want anything other than...fun with you. and that’s not something you can offer him.

“i didn’t ask for the compliment,” you say, feeling yourself grow more defensive and snippy as he leans in closer to you. like he’s becoming more and more enticed at the way you dismiss him. “why are you even talking to me?”

“why are you trying to not talk to me?” he counters, cocking his head to the side as his eyes pierce yours. it makes you unbearably nervous, how confident and sure he can stare at you without the slightest bit of hesitation. “i wanna get to know you.”

“why?”

his lips quirk to the side like he knows he doesn’t really have an answer for you that would make sense. just that anytime he’s seen you around school, he’s been intrigued by you. he likes that you seem just as comfortable alone as you do with other people, how you always make sure to throw out all your wrappers and that you take the same routes everyday.

he can’t quite pinpoint it, he just likes something about you.

“because i have a feeling we’d be good for each other.”

and to this day, after nine months of dating, you still don’t know how he knew that. he had sat with you everyday that first month, getting to know you and watching you slowly open up to him. it had taken a bit longer than he initially thought but once it happened, you both saw he was right.

you had a natural chemistry and banter that only certain people had, something innate within the both of you bringing you closer and closer. he had asked you on a date one friday afternoon, suggesting to wear something comfortable and that he’d pick you up at six.

it had been the most chaotic first day of your life, a bizarre restaurant where you were blindfolded while you ate your meal followed by skating hand in hand at a roller rink. you both left with bruises littering your knees and hands, something very unsuspecting for a first date.

“i didn’t anticipate what a shit show that was gonna be,” he told you honestly when he dropped you home, walking you to your front door as you giggled; that was the best word to describe the evening.

but it had also been one of the best nights of your life, his contagious laugh and smile only making you laugh harder and smile wider. and when he asked you to be his girlfriend at your doorstep, he only continued to make you the happiest girl alive.

you couldn’t believe he had spent his senior with you. took you to his prom and after-prom in the mountains, got you a ticket to his graduation and showed you off proudly to his family, took you to every party that his fellow classmates had and always made sure you felt comfortable and included.

but you guys also talked about the elephant in the room, the fact that he’d be attending a college over an hour away while you stayed here to finish your last year of high school.

“what are we gonna do?” you asked one night, laid out on a blanket as you looked up at the sky. stargazing was something you guys had always done, doing it on a whim one night before it turned into a weekly date night activity.

he rolled over and held himself up on his elbow, reaching out to smooth out your hair as he looked over your face. “what do you mean?” he asked softly. and when you turned to him with tears in your eyes, he immediately took you in his arms.

“baby, what’s wrong?” he cooed. the night had been going fine, all smiles and laughs as you ate your incredibly unhealthy fast food under the night sky.

“i don’t wanna break up,” you whimpered against him, your hands fisting his grey sweatshirt as you hid your face in his neck. he pressed a kiss to your head, bringing a hand to your back as he rubbed up and down soothingly.

“who said anything about breaking up, my love?” he cooed, the term of endearment causing your stomach to swoop. he had just started calling you that after he told you he loved you a few weeks ago, remembering the way he looked at you so sweetly when he confessed those words.

“i-i just assumed you wouldn’t wanna be with your high school girlfriend in college,” you say quietly against him. “it would make sense, i guess, so i can’t say i blame you but-”

he brings your face to his as he places a firm kiss on your lips, melting into you as he palms your cheek softly. you kiss him back immediately, feeling your heart break at the thought of never being able to do this again.

“i don’t know why you’re thinking like that,” he mumbles once he pulls back, running his hand through your hair before tucking the strands behind your ear. “but get those thoughts out of your head. i’m not breaking up with you, baby. in case you forgot, i just told you i loved you the other day.”

“i know but-”

“but what?” he asks with a smirk, pushing you down on your back and rubbing the stray tear off your cheek. “you think i just say shit to say it?”

“no, but-”

“then stop. i’ll tell everyone at college i have a high school girlfriend and they won’t have shit to say about it.”

you giggle softly at his tone and then even more when he tickles your sides, your screeching causing him to smile and bend down to kiss you again. it’s a night you think you’ll always remember, a night that really solidified your relationship and made you put 100% of your trust in him.

it’s why now, as you help him move into his college dorm, you have not a single feeling of doubt or anxiety. you told each other you’re gonna alternate weekends, him driving to you or you driving to him on weekends you’re both free of school or sport obligations.

his roommate mingi was a tall, intimidating boy who the second his mouth opened you took a liking too. he was bouncy and happy and loud and him and wooyoung got on a little too well. you were concerned about the wellbeing and ears of everyone in the dorm, seeing how playful and friendly the boys were with each other already.

you had left to go home with a parting kiss on your lips and his lowly mumbled “i’ll see you soon, baby,” in your ear, his words immediately sending excitement through you. because you hadn’t even left and you were already so eager to see him again.

and for the first two months, everything had been great. you texted and facetimed everyday, he went to you and you went to him and he made you feel as welcomed at the college parties as he did at the old high school ones he’d take you too.

but then your first inkling that something didn’t feel right was at a halloween get together at his friend’s frat house. hongjoong was the type of a guy you think most college girls longed for: attractive and alluring but extremely unattainable. wooyoung had introduced him as one of mingi’s best friends, the small group of men as nice as they were handsome.

there had even been a few girls, all of them either friends or lovers of the boys, who welcomed you with open arms and took you under their wing. but then there was one girl who the second you met her, she rubbed you the wrong way.

“lisa!” one of them said, grabbing a pretty girl with black hair and bringing her over to you. “this is y/n. wooyoung’s girlfriend!”

“ahh this is the high school girl he always talks about,” she says excitedly, her voice high and nasally as she brings you in for a friendly, gentle hug. “nice to finally meet you.”

“you too,” you smile. “are you one of the guys girlfriends?”

she smirks at your question and something about it unnerves you, the way her pretty lips pull up and her eyebrows raise causing you to cave in on yourself.

“nope, no boyfriend for me,” she says. “but i’m hoping to find one....soon.” you watch her eyes travel toward wooyoung and his group of friends, you heart twinging with the slightest bit of insecurity and fear, before she looks back at you. “how long have you and woo been together?”

your eyes narrow at the nickname but you shake it off, smiling at her as you tell her it’ll be a year next month.

“aw, how exciting! that’s a long time for people so young.”

you choke out a laugh as you nod your head, watching her eyes filter over to wooyoung and his friends again. she really is one of the prettiest girls you’ve ever met, not seeing why anyone in that group wouldn’t jump at the chance to be with her.

but then wooyoung turns around and his eyes light up upon seeing you, walking over and wrapping his arm around your waist.

“hi, baby. i see you met, lisa.”

“yeah,” you say quietly, shyly smiling at him before lisa’s voice cuts in. “you didn’t tell me you guys have been together for a year!”

“almost a year,” you mumble but it goes unheard as wooyoung tightens his hold on your waist. “yup,” he says, placing a kiss on the side of your head and you can’t help but press yourself into him. “it has been pretty long, right, y/n?”

you lick at your lips as you nod your head, something about his words making your stomach knot until he squeezes your waist affectionately. “i want you to meet someone, my friend yeosang just got here.” you’d heard a lot about that boy over these past few weeks, someone in a few of his classes who rivaled him in terms of sassy remarks.

“okay,” you say softly, smiling up at him and he places a peck on your cheek. “it was nice meeting you, lisa.” she smiles at you in a way that seems forced, her mouth tight and eyes looking between you two with a cold, almost mocking expression; it’s hard to explain really, you just know you don’t like it.

“you too, y/n, i hope we can hang out some other time.” you smile at her as you nod your head, wooyoung dismissing the girl with a “see ya, lisa,” as you make your way to the other room.

you don’t question wooyoung until later that night, your head on his chest as he absentmindley plays with your hair. “woo, how do you know lisa?” you blurt out, his nickname falling from your lips causing her voice to ring in your head.

“she’s friends with mingi and them,” he tells you lazily, his eyes closed as his fingers continue to rake through your hair. “think she’s also in my english class.” you take in the information and nod your head, your quiet “oh,” causing him to pop open one eye.

“why do you ask?”

you shrug your shoulders as you turn to bury your face further into him, feeling his hand quickly pull you away so you can look at him. “y/n...” he says and you can’t help the way you let out a tiny sigh. you don’t know why it’s been bothering you all night, the way she kept looking his way and called him by that name, but it has.

and now you’re looking like a stupid, insecure girlfriend the second you meet one of his female friends. (except you didn’t have a problem with the four others you had met, it was just her).

“what?” you squeak quietly. he takes your face in his hands, thumbs softly rubbing at your cheeks as he looks down at you with soft eyes. soft and honest and sweet, the way they’ve always looked at you.

“what’s wrong?”

“nothing,” you insist, shaking your head as his warm hands cover your cheeks. “i just...she’s pretty.” the last two words are squeaky and fall flat, a tiny sigh leaving him as he brings your face in closer and pecks the tip of your nose.

“so are you,” he says, his thumbs caressing your cheeks again as he looks at you. “you’re pretty and you’re mine,” he says, snaking his hand down to tickle at your stomach. you giggle and wriggle against him, your tiny squeals of his name and his deep chuckle settling the sinking feeling in your stomach.

you’re just being insecure, you think, wooyoung had never given you a reason not to trust him.

three weeks later, on your one year anniversary, wooyoung comes down from school and spends the day with you. he took to the same restaurant and rollerskating rink like he did so long ago, when you were shy and reserved and still a little confused as to why he wanted to spend time with you.

but this time was even better than the last, still chaotic and a bit of a mess but some much needed time with your boyfriend. because with his coursework picking up, you haven’t been able to talk with as much during the week. but now you’re back at your house, laid out in your bed with your head on his shoulder as you watch a movie; or at least try to.

because ever since the horror started, his phone hadn’t stopped buzzing. he kept kissing your head in apology, taking it from your bedside table and typing out message after message; you didn’t say anything until he had gone back and forth ten times.

“do you want me to pause it?” you asked, moving your head off of him and scooting over. he looked over after he sent the message, shaking his head before putting his phone face down on the table; you try not to feel uneasy.

“no, love, i’m sorry,” he says, throwing his arm back around you before tugging him in to you. “lisa just had a few questions about an english project due next week.”

you feel yourself grow stiff at the mention of her name, the casual way in which he says it not settling you in the slightest. instead, it makes you remember just how unsettled her presence made you. how something about her words and eyes seemed disingenuous. and perhaps you still think it was your own insecurities but you’ve also never not trusted your instincts before.

“oh.”

he looks over at the tone in your your voice, frowning ever so slightly before pulling you into him. “i’m sorry, babe, i promise i’ll pay attention now,” he says, nuzzling his face into your neck. you smile as his hair starts to tickle your neck, giggling when you feel his lips on your skin before you’re screeching his name when he gets you on your back.

“stop,” you whine playfully, despite the way your arms wrap around his shoulders. he looks at you and smiles, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips. you hear the faint double vibration of his phone on your bedside table but you both ignore it, allowing his tongue to slip into your mouth as his hand rests on your waist.

“love you, baby,” he hummed lowly when he pulled back, trailing his lips down to your neck before they go farther and farther until your mumbling your cries in the crook of your arm.

and because he loves you, he always understood you didn’t like to drink. you didn’t like the taste of it or the idea of not being in control of your body, settling for a coke or water at any party you went to.

but a week before his semester was over, you drove up to visit and found yourself at another frat party. it was just as packed and loud as it was last time, the slightly overwhelming scent of alcohol and chattering of college kids making you uneasy.

wooyoung and his friend’s made it easier, though, including you in the conversation when prompted and sitting with you as they waited for their turn at beer pong. “are you sure you don’t wanna play, love?” he asked you lowly, knelt between your knees as he looked up at you.

“you know i don’t drink, wooyoung,” you said lowly, cheeks burning because you feel like a stupid little kid here. and he knows you don’t like these things in the first place so why would you wanna play?

“i know but it’s just a game ba-”

“wooyoung! c’mon, i need a team member still,” lisa’s voice whined, smiling at you before her gaze trains on wooyoung. you narrow your eyes slightly, a sinking feeling deep within the pit of your stomach as you watch wooyoung nod his head at her.

“i’ll be back, love, watch how quick i win,” he winks, raising up to place a peck on your lips before snaking over to the table. you watch with a small smile before it falls from your face, looking down to play with your fingers. you wanna play with him but the crowd and environment is too much, coupled in with the fact you’d be experiencing this firsthand in front of a bunch of seasoned college kids who will probably laugh at you.

you look like you don’t belong here and you feel like it too. but wooyoung does, his handsome smile and infectious laugh just naturally bringing people in. an excited squeal leaves lisa when wooyoung’s ball lands right in the cup, his and her hand meeting in a high five that lingers just a little too long.

you’re sitting there for twenty minutes, just watching pathetically as wooyoung and lisa land ball after ball. every time she gets in it, she’ll throw her arms up and her pretty long hair will swirl around gracefully. you have to resist the urge to roll your eyes, taking your phone out to distract yourself.

“hey,” you hear a voice say. your head pops up to see if they’re talking to you, the boy wooyoung introduced to you as yeosang looking down at you. he had described him as sassy and a bit of a blunt asshole but you hadn’t gotten that impression at all. he seemed sweet and kind, a soft-spoken voice with even softer eyes.

“hi. yeosang, right?”

“yeah,” he smiles, taking the seat next to you. there’s a few moments of silence and you look over again when lisa’s squeal pierces your ears. you take a sharp inhale, averting your eyes before you can see her and wooyoung celebrate together again.

“why are you sitting here alone?”

you peak at the boy looking thoughtfully at you and shrug, your lips quirking before you look back down at your hands. “just waiting for wooyoung to be finished,” you tell him. but then you hear someone say “rematch!” and your head snaps over, wooyoung smiling challengingly as he nods his head.

his eyes graze over to you and they turn sympathetic, a frown on his face before he mouths “sorry,” before holding up one finger. you let out a sigh but nod your head, sending him a small smile that drops when his attention is pulled away by lisa.

“you should tell him it bothers you,” you hear yeosang say, looking over at the boy with a wide eyed gaze. he says it so straight forwardly that it causes you to grown nervous, biting your lip before you open your mouth to speak.

“what?”

he raises his eyebrow and you know he’s seeing through your lie. the lie that you’re not all bothered by being here and watching him play with another girl. a girl you’re almost positive has ill-intentions. and now you see where yeosang’s bluntness comes in.

“that him and lisa make you uncomfortable,” yeosang tells you, looking over and seeing them smile at one another in victory. “because you’re worried, aren’t you?”

it’s the first time it’s been verbalized and it makes your stomach squeeze painfully, sadness and anger and disappointment flooding through you. “should i be?” you squeak, since you know he sees you them a lot more than you.

“i don’t know,” he says, the both of you looking over in time to see lisa smack wooyoung’s arm playfully as she throws her head back. “should you be?”

your conversation with yeosang rings your head for the rest of your time you’re there, wooyoung coming over after the eventual third game and taking you in his arms. “i’m so sorry, love, these pussies just wouldn’t accept losing,” he says loudly enough for mingi and another shorter boy to hear.

“it’s okay,” you say softly, begging him with your eyes to get out of here. and he must see it immediately because he takes your hand in his and pulls you up, snaking his arm around your waist tightly. “i’ll make it up to you, i promise,” he hums against your ear, “you wanna leave?”

you nod against him as you smile shyly, pushing yourself further into him. wooyoung says his goodbyes to his friends, the girls you’d been talking to before waving at you and saying they hope to see you the next time you come up. all the girls but lisa, who snaked her way over with a frown on her face.

“you guys are leaving?” she whined, looking over you quickly before switching to wooyoung. “but what if i need other partner?” your boyfriend chuckles at the girl, tightening his hold on you when he feels you stiffen.

“san’s pretty good, i’m just better,” wooyoung says before looking down at you. “little one wants to leave, though.” he says it lightheartedly but it makes your cheeks warm, like he’s talking about you as a little kid.

“oh c’mon, y/n,” lisa says, her cold hand touching your arm playfully. “we were having fun.” you smile despite the rage coursing through you, shrugging your shoulders as you mumble out an excuse that you’re tired.

“ah, right, i always forget you’re just a little high schooler,” she says, her voice snide and mocking like she knows that was one of your biggest insecurities. about you and wooyoung staying together. “you don’t like this kind of stuff, do you?”

“i don’t like my boyfriend ignoring me, no,” you snap, lisa’s eyebrow raising as she looks between you and the boy staring at you in shock; you never snap like that and he hadn’t realized you felt that way.

“yikes,” she mutters, her eyebrows shooting up sarcastically before looking at wooyoung comfortingly. “well i’ll see you guys soon, maybe,” she hums, might as well having said maybe, if you guys are still together come the spring semester.

“what was that?” wooyoung asks when you get outside, your hands intertwined as you walk to his dorm.

“what was what?” you mumble, your eyes trained down on the street in front of you. you hadn’t meant to snap like that but you couldn’t help it, the whole night had been rubbing you the wrong way.

“i wasn’t ignoring you, y/n, i was just preoccupied with the game. i asked you if you wanted to play.”

“when have i ever wanted to play drinking games, wooyoung?” you ask him, turning your head to look at him. “you know parties aren’t my thing.”

“then why’d you say it was okay to go?” he asks, the slightest hint of annoyance in his tone making you flare with anger. is he serious? he’s annoyed right now?

“because you wanted to go,” you say, eyebrows narrowed at him in confusion. “i wasn’t gonna ruin your last weekend here and say we shouldn’t go.”

“well i also don’t wanna fight with you my last weekend here, baby,” he says, smiling softly as his eyes roam over your face. he stops you both of you from walking and brings a hand to your hair, tucking it behind your ear gently. “we got through the first semester with no problems, love, let’s not ruin that, okay? i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to make you feel ignored.”

you let out a sigh at his voice, hating the way his soft tone and eyes can always make you feel relaxed. your eyes bore into his and he raises a brow, tapping the tip of your nose before leaning down to kiss it. “i’m sorry, babyyy,” he drags out, wrapping his hands around your waist and placing a peck on your neck. “don’t be mad at me.”

“i’m not mad at you,” you sigh out, not being able to help the smile on your face at his whining. and once he feels your body relax, it’s like he knows he’s clear. because he pops up and kisses you on the lips, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek.

“let’s get home now, yeah? i want you sitting on my-”

“wooyoung!” you squeal, your hands flying up to your red cheeks as his loud giggle echoes through the street.

you don’t know when exactly you felt the slight change between you and wooyoung. it might have been during christmas break, those six weeks of what was supposed to be bliss something of a reality shock.

you thought spending everyday with him would be perfect, basking in the way you’d be able to do everything together again: go on dates and watch movies and have sleepovers so you could fall asleep next to him and wake to a kiss on your cheek. but instead, tensions began to form.

it was almost unrecognizable at first, your dates still full of smiles and laughs but always ending short. “i’m sorry baby, my mom needs me to watch my brother,” he’d say, “i gotta wake up early tomorrow, me and the boys are gonna go to the gym in the morning.”

but then when you guys actually were together, he’d seem distracted. absentmindley watching tv or playing games with you, his phone constantly vibrating as it lay face down on the table or bed. you’d ask him about and he always said it was probably seonghwa, jongho and yunho going crazy in the group chat.

then the one night you caught a glimpse of him texting, you hadn’t even meant to. you just leaned over him to grab your glass on the table, pecking his cheek in the process and hearing him chuckle happily. but then your eyes caught the name lisa at the top of the screen and you nearly dropped the drink in your hand.

“who are you texting?” you asked, holding your breath because if he lies, you know your heart’s gonna crumble right here.

“lisa,” he says and, while you’re grateful he doesn’t lie, it doesn’t seem to lessen the blow. “she’s registering late for classes so she was just asking me which ones i’m taking.”

“oh,” you squeak out, bringing the cup to your lips so you don’t blurt out something you can’t take back. you swallow it down as you watch a smirk cross his face, typing out a message before he puts his phone back down.

“you good?” he asks, turning to look at you watching him. you nod your head and place it back on the table, the phone buzzing again.

“do you text a lot?” you blurt out.

you watch his expression soften and he pulls you into him, his arm around your shoulder as he holds you tightly. “baby...” he says.

“what?” you squeak, feeling your cheeks grow warm. you hate that you feel this way, insecurity and doubt in him and your relationship laying heavy on your heart. but you have to imagine if you were texting another boy that wasn’t him, he wouldn’t like it. but you also don’t know, you never put him in the position to feel that way before.

“we’re just friends,” he says and you bite the inside of your cheek so you don’t scream; you hadn’t said anything like that so why is he telling you that? “she only texted me for the schedule, love.”

you look up to meet his gaze and see a frown on his lips, his eyes trailing over every part of your face. “do you trust me?” he then asks suddenly, seeing all of the doubt and hesitation over your face. you immediately nod your head, feeling tears burn the back of your eyes at the idea of starting a fight.

“then why does it seem like you don’t?”

and you don’t think much of this comment at the time, simply telling him all of your concerns about her being pretty and fun at parties and maybe being a better fit for him.

but in retrospect, when you’ll look back at this moment, you’ll realize just how manipulative he was. how this was the moment wooyoung looked you in the face and told you that he didn’t care about any of that, that he loved you and only you and that as long as you were his, he’d never look at another girl.

that he let you think for two more months that your intuition was wrong, that you were just an insecure girl not capable of trusting her perfect boyfriend. but he wasn’t a perfect boyfriend, you were coming to discover, especially when you sat alone in a restaurant near his school for your belated valentine’s day dinner.

he told you to come up that weekend so you could celebrate the holiday, saying just to meet him at a cute little cafe he’d been wanting to take you to. you arrived on time and waited in your car, looking around the area for his familiar face or figure. but after ten minutes, you shrugged it off and decided to get you guys a table.

but you sat there for almost forty minutes now, texts and calls going unanswered by him. workers and other customers were starting to notice you get more anxious, looking at you with sympathy in their gazes like you’d gotten stood up on a first date.

but this was your boyfriend of over a year, for your valentine’s day date, with a last minute gift you made for him weighing down your purse. feeling stupid and embarrassed, you shot up from your seat and charged back out to your car to drive to his dorm.

you walked the familiar path to his room and banged on the door, mingi’s face falling slightly when he sees the expression on your face. “hey, y/n,” he says, his voicer louder than usual. “what are you doing here?”

but sick of being meek and polite all the time, you push your way through and are hit with the stench of the small room courtesy of lisa, wooyoung and san passing a joint as they sit on his bed. four other people are also spread out on mingi’s and the dusty floor, looking up at you and nodding their heads at you; you’ve never seen them before.

wooyoung’s eyes widen the second he sees you, realization swarming in his face before he shoots up from his position.

“oh shit. hey, babe.”

you narrow your eyes at him, looking at the other people and seeing lisa staring right into you before you let out a humorless laugh, shaking your head and turning right around.

“y/n, wait,” wooyoung says, but you’re already out of the room before he can say anything else. angry tears sting your eyes as you stomp down the hall, footsteps behind you following quickly.

“y/n,” your boyfriend’s voice says again, tone begging and desperate for you to stop. but you only walk faster, walk as fast as you can to the door and push it open until the cold hair hits your face.

“y/n,” he says firmly one last time, grabbing you by the arm firmly but gently.

it fills you with so much rage, ripping it from his hold and spinning around to look at him. he has the balls to look sympathetic and upset, like he wasn’t getting high with random people, with lisa, while you were waiting for him on the date he planned.

“what?” you snap, looking at him and narrowing your eyes when he only looks at you taken back. “what wooyoung? what? you wouldn’t stop calling my name and now you don’t have anything to say?”

“i’m sorry,” he breathes out, stepping forward to put his arms around you but you step back and shake your head. hurt crosses his face and you wanna slap it off, thinking he has no right to be upset right now.

“why were you- i was waiting for you,” you tell him bluntly, voice strong despite how weak and defeated you feel. you know things have been rocky these past few months, missing each other’s phone calls and elapsed silences when you do see each other but missing a date?

“i know, baby, and i’m so sorry but i got distracted and didn’t notice the time and-”

“you’re the one who planned it wooyoung!” you yelp, “you got me excited thinking you actually wanted to see me and you left me waiting there for forty minutes.”

“i did wanna see you,” he says, stepping forward and grabbing you before you can move again. “i do wanna see you. i’m sorry. mingi’s friend’s came and we lost track of time.”

you press your lips into a tight line, wanting so badly to scream at him some more. these are all lousy excuses, they sound like bullshit to your and probably his own ears. if he didn’t wanna hang out with you, he could’ve just told you and saved you the-

his arms wrapping around you in a hug cause your thoughts to stop, arms shooting up as you consider pushing him away. but then his face falls into the crook of your neck and he tightens his hold on you, his mumbles of apologies and sweet nothings softening you slightly.

“why were you smoking?” you ask. you didn’t have a problem with him drinking or smoking, you just had no idea he did that now. you feel like you don’t know anything about him anymore.

“san brought it,” he says, pulling back and bringing his hand to your face. he caresses your cheek gently and a tiny frown covers his mouth, feeling a pang of guilt and hurt in his heart. “i really am sorry, love. i didn’t mean to forget and i’ve been so excited to see you. the time just got away from me.”

you purse your lips to the side in contemplation, looking up at him and shaking your head when, after a few silent moments, he smiles cutely at you. “i got you gift, too.”

you shake your head as you look at him, allowing yourself to move closer to him as he pulls you into his body. you’ve missed being like this with him, accepting the comfort and warmth and happiness he brings you.

“i did too,” you tell him, “even though i should make you wait.”

you know a pout is on his face before the whine leaves him, squeezing at your ticklish sides and making you spring away from him. “not fair!” you yelp. and then the teasing, borderline sadistic smile he gives you causes you to back up even more, speeding off in the direction of your car as he follows behind you.

you struggle to walk with his arms wrapped around your waist, the both of you giggling as you fumble to your car. a small voice in the back of your head is telling him you let him off too easy, that you’re stupid to not have asked more questions and to listen to the pit in your stomach telling you something’s wrong.

but you’re happy about the fact that you guys are good right now, that he’s smiling over at you with the softness is his eyes that remind you so much of the time you guys first started dating.

when you heard one monday that school would be closed on friday for testing, you immediately got the idea to surprise your boyfriend. you hadn’t been able to go up last week due to a family party and had really missed seeing him, his face on the camera of your phone not being enough to dull the ache in your chest.

so when friday morning came, so did your overwhelming excitement. you jumped in your car and drove to his college happily, knowing he didn’t have class until later in the day and hoping you’d be able to just lay in his arms for a few peaceful hours.

you stopped to get two coffees before you pulled into the parking lot, making your way into his building and down to his dorm. you do your best to knock on the door with your hip, surprised when it actually pushes open slightly. you hum happily, securing the two coffee cups in your hand before you open the door further.

“surprise!” you say teasingly, the happy smile on your face falling off immediately. because the surprise was actually for you, a shirtless lisa straddling your boyfriend’s lap as they kiss so naturally it makes you wanna puke.

you almost don’t believe what you’re looking at, the coffees falling from your hands and splattering on the floor. this isn’t real, there’s no way he would do that. he wouldn’t cheat on you, that’s not what your boyfriend wooyoung would ever do.

but in the way your heart is pounding rapidly and threatening to break, the way lisa’s head snaps away from wooyoung’s and looks at you in shock, your boyfriend’s eyes widening before he pushes lisa off to the side, you know he did it. he very well had lied and cheated and completely betrayed you.

“y/n, it’s-”

“not what i think?” you ask, voice eerily calm and even despite the chaos inside your body.

“it’s actually exactly what you think,” lisa’s snide voice says and the hatred that courses through you, you don’t think you’ve ever felt before. you wish you hadn’t dropped the coffees so you could’ve thrown it in her smug face.

“shut the fuck up, lisa,” wooyoung’s voice says, deep and low with an uncharacteristic growl in it before he makes his way over to you; it’s such a familiar scene, him moving toward you as you back away. except this time, you know you’re not forgiving him and the pain in your chest is ten time worse.

“baby, i-”

“don’t call me that,” you say, voice raising but still strong and even as you continue to walk backwards.

“okay, okay, just let me explain-”

“it doesn’t matter,” you say, shaking your head as you look at him with tears building in your eyes. you don’t wanna cry and scream and give the smirking girl looking at you the satisfaction of watching you have a breakdown. but you also can’t control the tears, watching him look at you with sadness and sympathy swarming in his eyes.

you thought you knew them so well and yet, he’d been lying to you the whole fucking time.

“it does, y/n, i have to tell you-”

“how long?” you ask. you don’t know why you ask, you don’t wanna know. but you can’t help it, the kiss looked far too natural and familiar to be something that happened in the heat of the moment.

“baby-”

and you can’t even help it when you stomp toward him and slap him across the face, your palm stinging as you his head snaps to the side. “i said to not fucking call me that,” you scream, wishing you could slap and punch and hit him over and over again for what he’s put you through these past few months. “now tell me. how long.”

and the coward that he is, with a red slap mark on his cheek, he shakes his head and looks at the coffee covered floor. you debate kicking him in the shin, just because you can and just because you have so many emotions swirling in you, before lisa’s voice pierces the air again.

“last day before christmas break,” she tells you, her shirt back on as she lays back in his bed like she belongs there. “i kissed him and he kissed me back.” you look at her and are half tempted to go and slap her as well, a humorless laugh leaving you. it sounds manic and unhinged, like you have two minutes before you completely absorb what’s happening and have a breakdown, but you can’t stop yourself from shaking your head.

“why do you sound so proud?” you ask her, voice shaking and threatening to break. “you knew he was with me. you knew he had a girlfriend. why did you always-” your voice breaks and you have to stop talking, holding in the tears and screams wanting to leave you so badly.

“i told you,” she says, cocking her head to the side as she looks at you. “i was hoping to find a boyfriend.”

“you didn’t find one,” wooyoung snaps, looking over her with disgust and rage in his eyes. “we were only-”

“hooking up?” lisa says, looking at him with a smirk before a melodic laugh leaves her mouth. “yeah, that sounds a lot better for your case, woo.” her eyes travel back to yours and she can only shrug her shoulders carelessly. “sorry but i saw him and wanted him. wish i had a better explanation for you.”

you bite the inside of your cheek and you think you’re probably drawing blood but you only nod your head, looking between her and wooyoung one last time. “well you have him now,” you say quietly, voice teary and breaking but it doesn’t even matter anymore. “enjoy.”

and like the dramatic exit any girl makes after she finds out she’s being cheated on, you turn around and slam the door before walking back outside. you feel the wet tears streaming down your face but only sniffle, wiping at your cheeks before the cold air finally hits them.

and that’s when you allow yourself to let out the first whimper, shaking your head as the tears start flowing because you can’t believe that just happened. you knew things had been rough and you knew you didn’t trust her so it’s not even like you can say you were surprised that she had gotten to him.

but that’s exactly the point. she had gotten to him, it was his duty to tell her to leave him alone and to stop talking to him and that he had a girlfriend he claimed to love. but now you have to get yourself together and drive home and wipe away every reminder in your room of-

“y/n, please,” you hear wooyoung say, his dejected form standing just outside the dorm building. you turn and his face crumbles when he sees you’re crying but really what the fuck does he expect? “please, please hear me out and if you never wanna see me again-”

“i already know i never wanna see you again,” you say, your voice back to being quiet and timid because you can’t take crying. you hate it and you hate that he did this. “so just go back inside, wooyoung.”

“no. not until you hear me out.”

and that sends another whole wave of emotions through you, mostly anger and rage as you stomp toward him and push him backward with all the strength you could muster.

“go fuck yourself, i don’t have to hear out anything from you. you’ve been cheating on me wooyoung. for three months. do you not fucking realize what you’ve done?”

“of course i do, y/n,” he says and you see tears welling up in his eyes now but you can’t find yourself to care. “i knew it was a mistake and i tried to break it off so many times but then-”

“you knew how i felt,” you say and now your voice holds no anger or strength. it’s just purely devastated and broken and shaky. “you knew i didn’t trust her and that i was insecure and you just kept telling me i never had anything to-” a sob leaves your mouth and you shake your head, backing away from him.

he already knows this, he heard this from you and lived with it for all of these months. he knew it before he started and while he did it, telling you that you trusted and loved each other, that you were his and he was yours and everything was gonna be okay.

“you’re such a fucking asshole,” you cry and a tear rolls down his cheek as he steps closer to you. “y/n.”

“i’m never gonna trust anyone ever again. do you fucking realize that, wooyoung?” you cry, his voice ringing in your head from january, when now you know he had already been with her, asking why you didn’t trust him. “you were with her and turned it around on me and asked why i didn’t trust you.”

he only starts to cry more as you piece together his lies and disgusting behavior, his gut wrenching and heart pounding the more this plays out.

“i’m sorry,” he says shakily, moving closer to you and taking your hands in his. “i’m sorry, y/n. please. please forgive me just this once and i promise i’ll-”

“you’re not seriously doing this right now,” you snap, eyes shooting up to his tearful ones and looking at him in outrage.

“i need you, baby, i love you and i fucked up but please, you can’t-”

“get away from me,” you say, attempting to rip your hands from his grasp. but he only tightens them and brings you closer to him.

“if you just listen to me, maybe you’ll-”

“stop,” you say, struggling to pull your hands free. you need to get away from him. you can’t hear him sound this pathetic and sad and begging.

“no. i need you to fucking hear me out and-”

“let go of me,” you say through clenched teeth, hot wet tears burning your eyes and running down your face; he’s making this a lot more dramatic and heartbreaking than it already is. but then he pulls you into him and wraps you in a hug and you’re so close to kneeing him between the legs.

his buries his head in the crook of your neck and holds you like his life depends on it, like his life just crashed down as he realized what the fuck he’s been doing for these past few months.

but you’ve realized for these past few months that things were different, that an awful strain was happening between you two and there was gonna be a sad ending no matter what.

so you push him away again with all the strength you have left and take a few steps backwards. “you lied to me, wooyoung. you lied to me and betrayed my trust and cheated on me with someone i told you i didn’t trust.”

“y/n, i know but-”

“i never wanna see you again. or talk to you again. do you understand me?”

“y/n...” tears are in his eyes and streaming down his cheeks and you’ve never seen him look so broken and fucked up before. but you’ve never felt this broken and fucked up before either, feeling like you’re about to collapse from the emotional havoc within you.

“we’re done, wooyoung,” you say, with a tone of finality and strength you can’t believe you have right now. but you also have to get one more dig in because you think you have the right to after all of this. “go back to lisa, now.”

you walk to your car and feel relieved when he doesn’t follow you, slamming your car door and locking it before you allow yourself to really cry. sobbing uncontrollably into your hands, to the point where it’s hard to breathe and you don’t think you’re ever gonna remember how to breathe again.

a tapping at your window has you jumping, getting ready to take off in reverse if it’s wooyoung begging for a second chance. but your teary eyes widen when you see his roommate mingi, looking at you with sad eyes. you swallow down the lump in your throat and get out of the car hesitantly, looking around to see if wooyoung was lurking.

you don’t say anything when you get out but mingi doesn’t say anything either. he just takes in your red eyes and teary, puffy face as the sounds of your sobs ring in his head over and over. sobs he feels at fault for, too.

“you found out?”

and even though you were already so broken and upset, those words somehow completely shatter you. your head snaps up and mingi’s face turns even more guilty and sad. you thought you and mingi were friends, always hanging out in the dorm with wooyoung and really coming to like the banter you three had.

but that question really makes it seem as if...

“you knew?”

he bites at his lip and doesn’t make a move, but the look in his eyes gives you all the confirmation you need. the way they look at you so apologetically and with pity, before they start roaming ever part of your face but your eyes.

another choked, broken laugh leaves your mouth and you just turn around to get back in your car. but mingi’s big hand takes the top of the door and stops it, his deep “wait,” causing you to snap around.

“why?” you snap, “you fucking knew and you didn’t tell me, mingi!”

“he’s one of my best friends and my roommate, y/n, what i was supposed to-”

“and who am i?” you scream, because you’ve taken just about all you can today. “i thought we were friends too, mingi.” his soft, sympathetic eyes roam over your face and his giant frame deflates, biting down on his lower lip hesitantly.

“i only found out last month,” he tells you honestly, “and he told me he was gonna stop.”

“oh, so what, he cheats on me in secret for a few months and everyone keeps me in the dark like a fucking idiot?”

mingi looks down at hearing the brokenness and anger in your voice, his lack of a response or justification the only appropriate thing about this moment. because it doesn’t matter, none of this matters anymore and you just wanna drive home and forget about all of this.

“it doesn’t even matter, mingi,” you say, taking his hand off your car door before dropping it in the air. “it’s over now. we’re done and they can be happy now.”

“he loves you, y/n,” the boy says quietly, like that’s supposed to make you feel better and run back into wooyoung’s arms. but you only laugh and shake your head, closing the door in his face before starting up your car.

because if that’s love, you hope to never be loved again. it made you go against your intuition and doubt yourself and allowed you to stay with someone who just ended up lying to you and hurting you.

(part 2)

#legit some emo shit #sorry luvs #hehe #anyway #wooyoungs tattoo!!#wooyoung #wooyoung angst #ateez #ateez angst #request #lisa is also my fav so pls dont yell at me

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