seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from China
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Taiwan
seen from Russia
seen from Japan
seen from United States
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seen from United States
*faint coughing over comms* Hello this is your Captain speaking… the flu is spreading on the ship. Keep you distance from people with symptoms and- *muffled scream*
HELLO THIS IS YOUR MEDICAL OFFICER. THESE ORDERS ALSO INCLUDE THE CAPTAIN. STAY HYDRATED. DO NOT TEST ME.
*comms rustling* Hello, this is your Captain speaking. Due to an emergency call from a civilian passenger ship we will enter a Stargate. Entry in 30. Secure yourself and read instructions. (was that good?
*muffled response*
Yeah. Yeah got it- oh. I forgot to turn the dang thing off) *louder again* Captain out.
*over comms* hello, this is your captain speaking…
AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING WE ARE UNDER ATTACK EVERYONE HOLD THE FUCK ON oh wait we gotta censor that out of the recordings- OH FUCK *extreme audio feedback screech*
*Announcement jingle* Hello crew, this is your captain speaking. Welcome back. I hope you had a nice shore leave. If not, group therapy is on wednesday during Solis shift.
*unusually calm* Hello crew, this is your Captain speaking. I have an announcement to make. I lived.
*over comms* Hello, this is your captain speaking. Bio Team. Why is there a lizard infestation in mechanical. I didn’t study command for three years and almost died five times for this bullsh- ahem. Report to bridge.
From: Bridge, Captain
To: Engineering Dep.
Door is stuck. I am stuck. Please get me out.
Mechanics Departement Records Stardate: 11/29
This is an excerpt of a ten minutes long recording.
Captain: (seemingly repeatedly hitting something on the ground with an instruction manual) -DIE *thunk* DIE *thunk* DIE *thunk* DIEDIEDIE *thonk*-
