hey y’all i did a jakeziyal art trade with @spaceteenagers and she asked for a roman holiday au (she’s said some words about it here). this was so much fun even though i’ve never watched the movie (oops!!)
hey a while ago you did a poetry reading for an ask I sent for an ask game and I don't know if I ever got around to telling you that I really like your voice, it's really gentle and pretty!!! I hope you're having a good day
Hey, thanks!! Coincidentally I was listening to that post today bc I was going thru my audio posts. I think I sound a bit more posh than I usually do bc I was conscious of how my voice sounded while I was recording but I’m glad u like my voice :-) I hope ur having a good day too!
hello hi!!! I noticed that you have a headcanon for bpd Draco and I have bpd and I'm really interested in that headcanon. do you think you could tell me more about it (or if you've been asked a lot and ur sick of explaining maybe link me to a post or something. idk.) thank you!!
((i hope youre ok with me publishing this instead of responding privately, just tell me if youre not and ill remove this post))
tl;dr: i think draco has bpd because i think that the sudden change in his life around book 6 took too much of a toll on his psyche, and because he exhibits quite a few symptoms/traits of bpd, including keeping people close to him through manipulation and dysphoric/dissociative eisodes, and i personally can definitely see him having thoughts and emotional shit characteristic of bpd. also i have a tendency to project myself onto characters lmao
ive actually never been asked this before !!! i mostly hc draco as having bpd because i have a huge habit of projecting myself onto characters but tbh i feel like the pressure put on him by voldy and the death eaters as a teenager and even the way his parents treated him as a child mightve led to him developing bpd.
draco was obviously pampered by his parents as a kid, but then voldemort, under whom his parents held a high position, kinda spun the tables around and put him in a situation where he had to kill dumbledore, a task that he was nowhere near mature enough to do.
since he was so coddled when he was younger, he didnt develop coping strategies for emotional toil and he wasnt at all ready for the emotional burden of assassinating dumbledore.
i think this led to his developing bpd because its similar to the way that im pretty sure i developed it. im an only child and my mom was maybe too close to me even after she and my dad separated, and she stopped being accepting after i started developing into a person of my own.
this definitely didnt help when i started actually being under stress at school - i was a smart kid and sailed through elementary, intermediate, and middle school, but high school changed my entire environment a lot emotionally and i didnt have any support (both bc of the mom thing and bc im stubborn as fu*k) and yea lol. fun fact migraine by 21p is the only reason i survived that autumn
basically both me and lil malfoy were suddenly dumped into stressful situations without support from anyone we relied on before
and now on to the actual borderline traits draco exhibits!! fun fun
even from the beginning of the series, draco kinda keeps crabbe and goyle as his friends-but-not-friends and throughout the books he kinda uses his parents’ power over their parents to keep them friends with him
thats not as significant as other stuff but i felt that it was worth mentioning since the beginning signs of bpd often start manifesting in early adolescence (e.g. around the first book)
this is probably gonna progressively make less sense as i go along im tired
i also feel like dracos reaction to the whole “being assigned the task of killing dumbledore” thing was different than the reaction a neurotypical would have???? like maybe im reaching here but from what we saw of him during his sixth year he seemed more.... desperate and alone than i think a nt would have been in that situation.
hes also seen having the episode in the bathroom, which can definitely be interpreted as being one of the anxious/dysphoric episodes commonly associated with bpd.
this ties into his overall sixth-year situation because as he distanced himself from other people in order to try and protect himself and his goals, he removed his emotional outlets and opportunities for help.
and of course, the actual core emotional traits of bpd..... we obviously dont see much into dracos mind and emotions and thought processes because the series is not focused on him but i can honestly really see draco having a huge fear of abandonment ????
hes pretty obviously good at compartmentalizing his life so he would be able to internalize those feelings pretty well without too many people noticing?? i think that also is how he kept the same group of associates around him for so long, combined with the fact that their parents all worked for voldemort with each other.
similar to myself (again, again, i know, i did say this is pretty self-projection-y), i think draco kinda feels pressure to hide his feelings like this ..... although he does it because of the people around him, and i do it bc avpd is hell
the rest of this stuff delves way further into headcanon than it does canon but i really do think draco has serious identity issues and i could o on about my hcs for his self destructive behavior
holy ass i am literally just putting my own issues onto this poor guy
ANYWAY draco lucius malfoy, my gay son, has borderline personality disorder and i will probably elaborate on this in the morning
I am so so so so proud of you I don't even have words. thank you for sharing your story. I'm going through a similar situation (though a different addiction) and trying to quit, may we fight for this together. best of luck on the road ahead. <3
i believe in you! we’ll conquer this together, for sure. stay strong my friend. <3
spaceteenagers replied to your post:just went outside and lied down in the middle of a...
that’s the aesthetic. the Dream
i no rite
this is why i love living right next to a highway (that and the school bus is a public bus so i pretty much never have to worry about missing it)
the quiet serenity of an open road abandoned momentarily due to the light of a single star being blocked out by the road’s containing planet is the best experience of my life
since you're reblogging lots of dream posts I thought I'd tell you what I dreamt last night! I dreamt that I was at my school talking to my old writing teacher about some sort of personal issue (I don't know why. my writing teacher is actually a huge racist and a homophobe and he's awful) but then he sent me to go buy Dairy Queen (I really love Dairy Queen) except I got lost on the way there. also the Dairy Queen was located in my school. that's about it
cool! last night I dreamed my computer was a flying carpet and was sort of hard to steer and I was trying to steer it up these spiral staircases in a school to get away from people who were trying to take it away from me and also who were trying to put venomous bugs up my pants
