#splinter ic

[chaoticxbeast]

"You are gracious to want to help someone grow, but keep in mind, you cant do the work for them. They will only grow once they are willing to truly listen and to face themselves and see that they are both good and bad. Growth is painful. It hurts to look at the darker aspects of yourself, and pinpoint the parts of us we want to change. It hurts to see that we have ways about us that could even hurt someone else. But that is how life is for all of us. Everyone has faults, but that doesn't mean we are not kind. It doesn't mean we cant grow. Growth starts with truth. Honesty. Open communication and compassion. If our loved ones never tells us how they got hurt by us, we cant grow. So, honesty is a gift. But its only a gift if we choose to listen and hold their words with compassion towards the other person and towards ourself."

[chaoticxbeast]

Anonymous said: Splinter, can you talk about family values? Perhaps give a good advice?

"Off curse." The tall rat fell quiet. His eyes downcast, a hand stroking down along his beard. And then, he straightened up, with a look of content on his face. "You might as well have asked Michelangelo about this. He knows very well the most important value of all." He paused, the look on his face grew even lighter, as if a laugh was just about to escape him. "The most important value for a family is togetherness, joy and celebration. Connecting with the sole purpose of having laughter, humor and fun. To celebrate the rites of passage, small achievements and accomplishments with a special occasion. Be it a party with dancing, having cake, a cheesy snack, hot cocoa, or sit in your favorite chair with a snuggly blanket wrapped around you. Life grows dull and meaningless without these moments together. You could even celebrate the fact you are alive! Mikey does all the time! As for me, I like to look within, meditate, and remember the happy moments of my past. For example, old memories of Tang Shen and little miwa, as we went for little walks to a glade not too far from our home. We would watch a little family of foxes together, as well as other forest life. I will never forget the way the light shone through the trees... ...As for the advice. In difficult times, its hard to celebrate. When you feel unlucky, you might be in a constant bad mood. It might feel like your wheels are spinning, as if something is holding you back. In those times, looking back at mistakes and to learn from them would be useful. Because life is full of lessons, and often people make the same mistakes again and again. Sometimes our bad luck is just the consequence of our own choices. However, if you look back and examine your mistakes, you can stop and think. How does my actions affect my life and the lives of other people? Give yourself a good advice and steer yourself into a better, more healthier direction."

[chaoticxbeast]

"Today's lesson is the introduction of the concept of balance. In Japanese, we say... Chowa. Balance. Leonardo might say, that balance is important to remain focused and calm. And he is correct. Emotional calm is the bliss of Chowa. However, there is more to Chowa than just focus and calm. Now. If you look at your hand. For those of you with five fingers, one hand is enough. For those with three fingers, you can use two hands. Imagine your life in your hand. Imagine that your work is your pinky finger. Rest and inner peace can be your thumb. Learning is the index finger. And relationships is another, and joy is another. Now. What if your life lacks learning. What happens to your hand? Well, one finger disappears. And without learning, you lose growth. Without growth, joy and work will start to shrink. Imagine how strange your hand will look and how difficult it will be to manouver our day, when important parts of us are missing. We are all complex beings. We all need many things in our life to feel Chowa. Things like joy, rest, work, friends and growth." The rat fell silent and glanced at his student. To see them study their hands deep in thought made his chest feel warm and whole, and his eyes softened with a faint smile. "So.. How are you keeping balance between the things that are important to you in your life?"

[chaoticxbeast]

"Kintsugi. Golden Repair. When you look at this broken cup, what does it remind you of?" The tall rats warm brown eyes curiously scanned the younger one before him. A small smile twitched upon his lips, and he held back the urge to pat the student on the head. "Something broken? Yes. And Donatello would perhaps say, that its structure is weaker than before. And he would be completely correct. The cup will fall apart if we are careless and pour boiling water into it. That's why we should know its limits." The rat turned the cup, to show its fragile handle. "Every kintsugi cup is unique, and must be handled with care. But how do we learn about the gentleness it deserves? We must be curious in a compassionate way. Because it's still a beautiful cup. Perhaps even more beautiful than the cup without scars. Perhaps the scars are like a proof of hardship that deserves respect. As you know...life may give us scars. But we can be strong again, with a bit of kind care. Even though the scars may make us more fragile, the experience defines us, and makes us wiser and more compassionate. Once, I cut my finger on this cup, but now I know where the sharp shard can be found. This is how it can be with people too. The ones with scars, can cut, if we are not gentle in our approach. That's why, it's so important to properly communicate our boundaries. Our needs. And to forgive and acknowledge that we all have scars and insecurities, that deserve respect."

[chaoticxbeast]

Anonymous said: Splinter, my friend misled me and I feel so exhausted and confused. Do you have an advice for me?

"Oh I see. Hmm...That is a shame. But nothing to feel shameful for. It can happen to the very best of us. I think my best advice would be to understand the pattern. Try to stay detached and ask them to help you understand if they are unclear or create the feeling of smoke and mirrors. Sadly, many individuals have an subconscious "engine" behind their ways. They might feel more safe if they explain by creating a sense of ambiguity instead of clarity. That way, its easier to escape accountability, or manipulate someone's reality in a very subtle way. Not everyone does this on purpose. It can be a learned coping mechanism from their childhood for example. But that doesn't mean its okay to do. To pull back, find clarity and rest if you feel overwhelmed and exhausted. Talk to a good friend, or someone you know who is good at sorting through issues. To be misled can feel disorientating and exhausting. You might even feel hurt by the actions of the one that has mislead you. But please understand, you are an innocent part in it. Whatever mess was made was not your responsibility, young one. Its important you let go of any guilt if you have been manipulated or misled.

Take it as a lesson in life. You might have been misled, but now you have a secret weapon. You know the patterns. You know the tricks. You know what to look for next time. And I'm afraid to say, it will most likely happen again. But when it does, pull back. Keep responses brief, neutral and focused on your personal experience. Stay grounded in reality, and in the facts you know."

[chaoticxbeast]

Splinter, do you believe in soulmates? Are they real? and have you met yours?

"Hm. I do believe I have. However, I am sorry to say, I can only offer my personal opinion, as no one truly knows if soulmates are real or not. To answer your question, I do believe in souls and I do believe in friends. And it seems logical for me to assume that a soul friend is someone you love. Someone you have a bond with. And perhaps our soul friends are our family, friends or others around us that affect us in our daily life. Maybe they are future friends we care about. Or even an enemy that teaches us an important lesson. However, I believe there are special people out there, who take a special role in our growth. They may be like mirrors that show you yourself in the most honest of ways, or like a light that reveal every part of you that needs to grow and heal. Its not about romance. Its about truth and important lessons. And sadly... growing pains are part of growing..." "...They may understand you in a way that makes you feel vulnerable, as if they see through you without judging. Perhaps they willingly stick around to help you grow. At least until its time for them to leave. Sometimes they do. And then, perhaps another soulmate will cross your path and make you learn more lessons." "...Sometimes we may meet them at a time when we are not ready for growth. Sometimes we reject them, because of our egos. But even if we do, its not for nothing we met them. Because we can always look back at what they had to teach us at any given time. And as we get older and wiser, we understand more and more about what they tried to teach us. Imagine if every person around us is a soul friend. Someone who agreed to help us, even before entering this life. Wouldn't it be foolish to refuse the help if we have already agreed at some point in our spiritual journey, to allow them to help us?"