forgive me, forgive me for failing you. / @sptmbr18th
the car had been silent for too long . just them , blood , and broken promises . not even the collection of john winchesters favourite bands able to break it . i'm not going anywhere , dean had promised a few months ago , and he had kept that promise about as well as you're going to be able to save him . he had barely gotten that guy out of his deal , and if there's one thing you cannot deny ? you aren't half the hunter dean is , so what hope do you have of breaking this deal and keeping him out of hell .
fist clenches tight , still bloody , and you're half glad bobby and ellen volunteered to drive jess part of the way back . being sat here , still splattered in jakes blood where you couldn't stop that only needed colour deans view of you . but , on the other hand , if she were here then you wouldn't need to have this talk .
" i don't forgive you . " temple leant against the glass of your window , the rumble of the impala rattling your skull just like when you were ten and pretended to be asleep in the back . you wish it were that easy now . " i can't give you that forgiveness , dean . " because dean had brought you back because he couldn't live alone , all while damning you to a life without him . because the moment you woke up in that shack , a timer had started on your life without him and he didn't tell you the truth .
because when the world slipped away , the last thing you knew was the comfort of your brothers arms around you . in those seconds it was like you were kids again , huddled at the heater of some motel you could never name , pressed into his side like he could protect you from the dark and evils outside . even if it hurt , and it had , dean had still made it feel like COMING HOME .
" there's nothing to forgive . you didn't fail , dean ; you promised dad to watch out for me , and you did that even when i was gone . i'm not gonna forgive something you didn't do . "
