#spuffy thoughts

[elliegr8151]

i love buffy's friends. i am occasionally enraged by them, and i still love them. but i don't think i realised, before, how much they made spike necessary in her life (specifically in season 7).

everyone in buffy's life demanded something of her. even if they never actually asked (which they did a lot anyway), they knew she would do whatever they needed her to do because it's buffy. they come down on her for her "imposed super-self-reliance" but when did they ever offer to do something for her without getting something in return. spike is one of the only people in the entire season to not really ask anything of her. he does it once, the entire time, when he asks her for help in the basement. and that's because he can't ask anyone else. but the rest of the time he stays out of the way, quietly waiting by her side until she asks him for his help, because she knows she can. he's always the first and sometimes only person to come to her defense.

and then some of them (*coughs* giles) have the gall to say its dangerous for her to lean on him. but who the fuck else is gonna be there for her. they need her to lead the battle, fine. but she doesn't have to do everything on her own. they are allowed to be kind to her, she's allowed to make mistakes. everyone else's behaviour in season 7 actually made her need him more because he was the only person who had her back unconditionally. season 7 is spike and buffys season because he was the only one who just supported her when she's given her entire life (in the literal sense TWICE) to everyone else. i just love them together.

[hyperfocus-museum]

Thinking about how I started watching Buffy with Graduation Day the week before season 4 started and the second Something Blue Aired, I knew something had changed in me forever. I fell in love with the idea of Spike and Buffy and it's still the ship I'm fondest of, it & Buffy as a show both feel like coming home whenever I come back to it, and it makes me giggle to think about how I knew basically nothing about their history and still said oh yes, these two need to be together forever.

I've never felt quite the same passion for any other ship, and I don't think I ever will. And I'm so grateful for this episode and for James and Sarah's acting prowess & chemistry for making it what it was!

[bramble-berries]

sometimes I just tear up when I think about how spike would do anything for Buffy. And I don’t mean like he’d kill for her, he’d die for her (and he’d do those things). But that he’d do something harder than that, the hardest thing a person can do, he’d look into himself and strive to be better for her. Not what he thought she wanted of him, but what he knew she needed him to be. She needed him to be good. And he became good for her, not to win her, but to be able to be by her side, to fight by her side, help her save the world.

[glitzbtvs]

Digital sketches by me. Buffy and Spike, Touched (BtVS 7x20). 

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond any experience,your eyes have their silence: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me, or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me though i have closed myself as fingers, you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens (touching skilfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and my life will shut very beautifully,suddenly, as when the heart of this flower imagines the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals the power of your intense fragility:whose texture compels me with the colour of its countries, rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes and opens;only something in me understands the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses) nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

—E.E. Cummings

[roseofithaca]

Spuffy are so cute when they just let themselves relax and chat normally to each other. I can see how people read the whole "queer coded" thing, Buffy feels like she's dirty or broken for wanting to be close to a vampire (without a soul), for no other reason than its what people think is "right". And that's when things always fall apart because it leads to Spike feeling dirty (beneath her/a thing etc) and they lash out at each other because of their own insecurities.

This is why I think Spike shouldn't have got his soul back. Maybe have him try and go through all the tests but for whatever reason his soul can't be recovered. Because him finding his humanity while still being a demon is what makes him more interesting than Angel. With his soul back, he's just another undead "human" wanting redemption for things he technically didn't do, the vampire did. I know this is supposedly how they handwave the whole r@pe thing but that's such a cop out imo. It should never have gone that far, just show his internal conflict with what the demon part of him wants and his recovering humanity knows is right. But have him continue to defy the supposed lore of vampires and humanity and work to be a good being, not necessarily a good "man".

Damn this ship is so complicated, part of why I love it, also why it makes me feel almost as wrong as Buffy does for loving it.

[elliegr8151]

i love the layers of fool for love so much. because you start out seeing spike trying to pick the perfect words to get the woman he loves to really see him for who he is, or who he's trying to be, but the entire episode that's what he's doing as well. the parallel between the "you're beneath me" moments works so well not just because you see that spike (despite all his efforts) can't outrun the fact william will always be a part of him but we also see him try and bare his soul (metaphorically, of course) to the women he loves again only for it to be thrown back in his face because he's still not good enough, even after all the effort he put into changing himself. i just love how cyclical it all is. it makes how much he grows over the season worth so much more. especially when he gets the moment on the stairs in the gift where she does finally see him, and even though she's still above him, she doesn't look down on him or reject him, she just sees him. he finally breaks out of the loop of romantic torment he's been in all his unlife and before that.

i think if they'd never had that dance in the alley and/or the moment on the stairs, s6 could have ended up a lot darker because he might not have had the moments of tenderness that i think accepting his past as william allowed him to reveal

[bramble-berries]

The reason why Buffy’s relationships fail is because she is the definition of Dom and she keeps trying to make herself Sub for her partners. That’s also why Spuffy works so well, because Spike has been salivating his whole life for a woman to throw him around and tell him what to do. The boy is a Sub and he knows what he’s about.

[bramble-berries]

Spike wears Buffy’s clothes. He loves to snuggle up in her hoodies when they have to be apart, and you know that boy is wearing her lacy panties when she comes home.