Nonna Pina Reviews Social Media Platforms: Part 1 – Instagram
Hi babies, it’s been brought to my attention that for a blog called “nonna reviews”, the structure of my reviews is a big ole mess and I think I have just the opportunity to fix that. I’ve had this idea for a theme-based series of posts for a while now and I’d like to use that to test a new format. Please be patient with me and do feel free to send me as much feedback as you want.
Nonna Reviews: The Instant Gram
Ah yes, the Instant Gram. Its strength lies in its briefness, with its limited number of pictures per post and short ass videos. It strives to be the perfect platform to quench our youth’s thirst for immediate gratification and please their short attention spans by throwing one-minute dog videos at them. Hence its name. Instant Gram. As just about any other platform, the Instant Gram does have a variety of communities within itself, and each community creates its own separate genre of content. Here’s what I came up with whilst being force-fed pretty feeds and celebrity grams by my granddaughter:
· a e s t h e t i c
o People with fancy editing apps and a mediocre to good sense of aestheticism uploading pretty pictures of pretty clothes and pretty things in pretty places. There’s a lot of white things. And white people. Basically window shopping without the windows or the shopping. They also often make things called moon boards. I did not understand what the moon had to do with that. Back in my days if we wanted to see pretty things – or the moon – we just went out. 6/10
· Animal grams
o Very, very, very good. Excellent. Very good indeed. 10/10
· Models????
o There’s a whole part of the grams in which young people wear pretty clothes and take pictures of themselves in front of their mirrors and call it modelling. I guess I respect the initiative and the determination these kids have to make their own careers from scratch, just don’t try to sell children diet pills and all that mess. That’s all kinds of messed up. 7/10 purely based on the fact that I can 100% be an Instant Gram model. I did notice they have a lack of grandma representation in their community. And I can fix that.
· Food Grammers
o Non-Italians butchering Italian food in all sorts of awful, gut-wrenching ways. Please stop that immediately. 0/10
· Those meem page things
o Essentially just screenshots of tweets that in their turn are nothing but jokes stolen from the tumbler. What I will say is that I saw one of someone saying “You’re barking up the wrong Scarlett Johansson” and that one made me chuckle a little. Keep it up. 8/10 as long as we bring back that one fat rabbit meem. Big chunk or something. I liked that one.
· Celebrity grams
o I mean, I guess, sure. 7.5/10 only because that one Chris Hemmed Worth is one nice young man.
· Celebrity grams for celebrities that don’t have the gram
o And also for celebrities that have the gram but people just… like a lot, I guess. I respect the enthusiasm and occasionally even the moderately weird edits. Do not appreciate people pretending to be famous people to steal from children. With that said, there’s a great deal of Kean Roots content and that pleases me. 7/10
· “comedy” grams
o I don’t even know what’s going on here. Mostly yelling and throwing condiments. Please don’t waste food and be nice to your mothers. 2/10. The 2 is for the videos that somehow manage to not worsen my tinnitus.
Overall decent app, as messy as the people on it, but we deserve what we deserve. 7/10 exclusively if you all are willing to learn to cook pasta properly. No milk. No putting it in there with the water and taking it out when it boils. Please, dear Lord, I have seen some awful, awful things.
Your grandma who is now afraid of the internet but is going to kickstart her modelling career soon,
Nonna Giuseppina Antonelli, Europe, Italy, Naples
