Stop spamming me.
This is not pertaining to anyone I’m following.
For the past few months, this girl had been talking to me. She came out of the woodwork days after Bowie passed away. We were all in such a huge amount of grief, and I had a lot of people come to me during this time. We helped each other out, tried to find comfort on each other. I didn’t take much notice of her at first, but she was friendly, and she was sad for Bowie.
Few days later, she asked me to RP (roleplay) with her, because I used to be very into RPing, and I even published a few of my RPs here on tumblr. I hadn’t RPed in a long time, and I was burned out from indulging in too much of it, so I had no interest in RPing. I told her so, but she kept begging, and I kept saying no. Not long after, she tells me she had terminal cancer. She only had a few more months left. This was right after Bowie passed away...from cancer...and so I was sympathetic. How unfair it was, that someone else will have to suffer, and leave this Earth before their time. I still did not RP with her, because I can no longer RP; I no longer have it in me, so I gave her a couple of links to the other Bowie RP blogs that exists solely for RPing. She found some of them on her own already, so I didn’t really do much to help. She went off with them, but continued to ask me to RP with her. I still say no, despite being very empathetic and sad for her.
Then, she decided, it’s okay, I don’t have to RP, even though it’s her “dying wish.” She suggested I could just play a game with her instead. I said okay. The game turns out that I had to write prompts for her (she would write a prompt back in exchange). For example, what being the girlfriend of Mr. Rice would entail. How would first sex with Julian be like. What kind of person is Julian to his lovers. Etc. She wanted me to write smut for her as well, and I gave her a few smutty prompts. I mean, they weren’t written very well. I half-assed through all of them, because I wasn’t finding the enjoyment in this at all. I just did it to satisfy her, because she was very sick, and getting worse, and she was dying.
It didn’t even occur to me that she was making it all up to manipulate me into doing things for her I didn’t really want to do. She would come to me, raging, because those RP blogs figured out her lies early on and they started to ignore her. They were nice at first, but then they stopped talking to her, because she pulled the same stunt on them that she did on me. She raged about how unfair it was, how they turned her into the bad guy, bring drama to her life and make it suck, when all she wanted to do was RP and have some fun before she leaves this Earth. Finally, one of the blogs bullied her away and she deactivated. I will admit, the blog that bullied her away took it too far, and they were needlessly cruel. She created a new account and came back to talk to me, continues to rage about the blog that chased her away. I felt for her. Here she only have a few months left, and everyone was being mean to her. I was still wrapped up in her lies.
But then, it started to get more and more coincidental. I would be busy, and I wouldn’t be able to write her a prompt right away. She would spam my inbox and beg me to answer her, asked if I was angry with her. Then she would tell me about the latest chemo session, the latest surgery, how she was in pain, how she was suffering, how she was dying, how scared she was, and then I cave in. I would immediately comfort her and write her a damn prompt.
Soon her situation would get more and more outlandish. So far, she had three to five surgeries, one failed surgery, chemo, cancer spreading all over, four heart attacks, fainting spells, and surgery scheduled at 2 AM. She forgot that she told me her location, and she would tell me she needs to go in for another surgery and had to go. I checked the current time of her location and it was 2 AM. First sign of suspicion on my end, I asked “It’s 2 AM...they scheduled surgery that late?”
Her reaction was to yell at me, making it seem like I’m being unsympathetic, that of course she would get surgery at 2 AM, it’s emergency surgery! But now she has her doubts, her country isn’t known for being the best in medicine, she blamed me for freaking her out and making her scared, maybe they took some of her organs and she didn’t even know. Classic gas-lighting. I bet she was actually just going to sleep, but decided to say that she was getting a surgery would be much better to gain more sympathy. I became more suspicious when she finally told me that one of her kidneys failed, and it would be very soon now, she would be gone soon.
So...I reached out to other blogs that had to deal with her. These blogs are also fanfic writers and I’ve read some of their work, and they read some of mine, and some of them RPed, so this girl would have contacted them. The blogs I went to have been around for a while, and I’ve known them for a long time. We might not be mutuals, but we know each other and we always see each other around, and I’ll even say we’re friends, so of course we’re gonna talk. I guess she didn’t think that we would know each other? These blogs said to me “Oh, girl, you’re being played...... she’s making it all up. She did this to ten other blogs.” They told me what she did to those other blogs...and it’s exactly what she did to me. She told me that her parents abandoned her at the hospital for weeks now, but then on that same day, she told someone else she was on the bus on her way home from school and she bitches about going to school and having cancer. I was the last one to find out about her. I was so naive.
Then...suddenly...her cancer is cured. Time for a celebration! Let’s hug and drink! She is cancer-free, she beat terminal cancer that has spread all over. And now...I know...she was fucking with me. She realized she can’t keep up with the lie because she would technically be dead in two months if she continued on with the story.
I ignored her for a few days because I was trying to think of what to say to her, how to say it. I thought she deserved some closure on why I want nothing to do with her, vs. me just ghosting out on her. I’m still that person who wants to be proper, thinking she deserves an explanation, when most would just tell her to fuck off and block her. She kept deactivating her blog and creating new ones, she would spam me and beg me to answer her. I was going to do this privately, but she kept creating a new blog, spamming me, then deactivating before I can type out why what she did was wrong, and why I want nothing to do with her. She would come, spam, deactivate. Come, spam, deactivate. I don’t know what else to do, so I had to write it here. I’m not naming any names. She knows who she is, and I bet some of us here knows who I’m talking about.
Am I angry? Yes. I’m angry. I’m pissed that I was so easily manipulated. I should have seen the signs. The signs were all there. I was so dumb. My own grandfather had terminal cancer, I should have seen through her bullshit. He went for chemo, and he went for surgery. When it failed, and it spread, they stopped all treatment, and they just allowed him to go comfortably. He was so weak, even blinking was a chore for him. That should have helped me figure out that she was lying, she was so damn active on tumblr. For someone who was dying, who had multiple surgeries, who had so many damn heart attacks, all in the span of a few weeks...and she is actively typing away on tumblr, begging for RPs from the RP blogs, and begging for prompts from fanfic writers while writing her own damn prompts and fanfic... I should have KNOWN. I should have known. I was blinded by compassion, and it was used against me. I was so dumb.
So, to the girl that used emotional manipulation on so many of us to get us to do things for you, leave me alone. I don’t want to hear it. I don’t give a shit. I don’t need an apology, or an explanation, I don’t want your tears, and I sure as hell don’t want, nor deserve, your hate. Just leave me alone, and stop bothering the other blogs as well.
