A Letter To My Sister After Election Day...
As I’m sure the world is aware, election day has come and gone, leaving us with the news that Donald Trump was selected as our next president. Waking up to this news was disheartening to me and so many others but I can’t say I was surprised. I have never been blind to the discrimination and hate that exists in this country. As a woman of color, who works in a social service agency, providing services to people from a number of disadvantaged backgrounds, I feel hurt but, above all else, I feel called to action! I have yet to determine what action will look like but I have been contemplating all day. It wasn’t until I received the following texts from my baby sister (she’s an adult but I’m still 8 years her senior) that I truly felt the weight of everything…
Definitely just had a panic attack in the bathroom. I can’t breathe. I can’t sit still. I feel uncomfortable and unsafe. I can’t handle this (…) The election. The tension on campus. The fact that if people make eye contact with me they look away. The fact that Regis has a president that seeks out the minorities after something happens instead of a president that creates an environment in which they feel safe/an environment that idiots don’t feel comfortable doing stupid things
A little background for you all: my baby sister, a young, black woman from Los Angeles, is currently away at college in a less than diverse (to put it nicely) university in Colorado. I am the oldest of three and currently in California. If you haven’t gotten the picture yet…I felt tearful and helpless in this moment. My world felt like it was crashing. I can manage my own feelings or hurt, anger, frustration and fear but the big sister in me can’t handle being too far away to provide real comfort to my sister in her time of need. I can’t deal with the thought that she is not comfortable and feels unsafe. It took me a minute to pull myself together (after fighting the desire to find my way onto the next plane headed for Colorado) and provide words of wisdom but eventually this is what I managed…maybe it is something we could all use during this time…
I know this is a difficult time but we have to keep our heads high. Get your friends who are on the same page together and support one another…laugh, cry, sing, scream, dance…whatever you all need. And make it a regular thing. Build the community and don’t exclude based off of race, gender, sexuality etc this is difficult for a lot of us. Smile and speak to those who look at you. Stand tall honey this is but a bump in the road. We knew it was coming whether we liked it or not. We knew white, male, heterosexual privilege wouldn’t allow another minority to win. But it is only because they recognize our strength and they fear what we are capable of. Set an example, be a voice, live your truth! Don’t let them silence you! You are too great to be silenced! Catch your breath baby…they want to watch us break…this is our chance to show them we refuse. Don’t deal with this alone….build and uplift your community. Bring everyone together and let your voices be heard. Slow deep breaths and remember you are stronger than this. It doesn’t feel good and thats fair…it shouldn’t. You aren’t the only one feeling this so call people up and create a support system.
As a mental health professional, and a woman, AND a person of color I recognize how easily it can be to just keep pushing through stressful times without giving yourself space to feel and process. I’m here to remind everyone that now, more than ever, we must take care of ourselves and one another! Take your time to reach out, process, mourn and spread love! Recharge and gain your strength! We are too strong to break! We have lost a battle but the war is not over.
“No one can burst your bubble unless you let them”
Stay Bubbly Beautiful People!
~Kali