One Pill Gone, Two More To Go: A Quick Update.
Hey guys! Just wanting to give you an update on my progress thus far. It’s been a while since I entered anything on my journey with mental illness. As I mentioned in my last article, after my doctor’s appointment last week, my psychiatrist said it was time to start reducing my medications. The medications I had been taking thus far are Seroquel (200 mg), Wellbutrin (450 mg), and BuSpar (15 mg, 3x a day), and I was taking 36 mg Concerta for my ADHD. A few months ago I took myself off of Concerta because it had started working against me in a really bad way. The lifestyle changes I had made were more effective in handling my symptoms than my medications were. I also had unintentionally started cutting back on my BuSpar. I just kept forgetting to take them because I hadn’t had any anxiety symptoms in so long I didn’t remember to take them. I was supposed to be taking three pills a day, but was only taking my first pill with breakfast, because that was the only one I remembered to take. I take all my other pills first thing in the morning with breakfast, with the exception of my Seroquel (that’s at bedtime). So in a few months time I went from taking 45 mg of BuSpar a day to only 15 mg, and still had no issues with anxiety. At 15 mg a day, my psychiatrist said it was pretty much not taking the medicine at all. And thus the beginning of my detox has begun.
As of today it has been exactly a week since I took my last dose of BuSpar. I have definitely noticed some differences. As with any psych med reduction, it takes about a month before the drug is effectively out of your system. Even though, I was only taking a minimal amount of the drug, the absence of it in my system has kind of hit me as a shock. The biggest difference I have noticed since I haven’t been taking it is how tired I stay. I have noticed a lethargy setting in since about day two or three and it has not left. And I have noticed some anxiety coming back. It comes through in waves. I spend most of the day without an issue, but when anxiety comes crashing in it is so strong at times I want to go grab my bottle of BuSpar and swallow a pill quickly. It lasts about an hour or two. There is no particular time it strikes, it just checks in whenever it wants to and then leaves. However towards the end of the week, like around day five, I have noticed the anxiety starting to taper off. It has definitely reduced in strength and longevity. My guess is this will continue until my body adjusts to being on its own. As far as the lethargy is concerned, I may start back working out again, or maybe I’ll just grab a second cup of coffee in the morning. Haven’t decided yet.
The doctor also told me once I start to become comfortable with the lack of anxiety medication I can start playing with my antidepressants. If not, he will start dosing me off when I see him again in November. My hope is I will be fully adjusted by sometime next month and will start slowly reducing my Wellbutrin. I have a 300 mg tablet and a 150. My goal is to slowly start leaving out the 150 mg pill and see how things go. I haven’t had any depression symptoms pretty much the entire year thus far. As always, if I don’t feel ready, I won’t rush the process. The last thing I want is cave into a total relapse and reverse all the good I have done. Lifestyle changes have been the biggest key to my recovery and I am committed to keeping everything I have changed and fought for.
There is definitely a sizable amount of risk involved in the reduction and removal of psych meds. My doctor forewarned me before we proceeded with the plan to reduce anything. About fifty percent of all patients who are on psychological medications experience a full episodic relapse of all symptoms. My doctor’s biggest fear, as well as mine, was me going into an episode and having to spend another week in the hospital to rehabilitate me. Why is that? Why is it so hard to resume the “normal life” we had before we were put on medications? I remember not having any medications and handling my life normally. The truth of the matter is these medications change the chemical makeup of our brains. It changes how everything works. Some of these medications stabilize certain chemicals and electrical responses and others gather chemicals from different parts of the body and restores the lack of chemical in the brain. It also doesn’t help that you have to be on these medications without relapse for an entire year. That’s a year of the brain and body adapting and functioning in a brand new way. So once you remove the pills, the body’s current cycle breaks and is scrambling to find a new way of coping and functioning. The sad truth is a lot of people can’t live without their medications after being on them. Once the chemical makeup of your brain has been changed, it sometimes can’t go back to the way it was. My hope is I am not one of the unfortunate fifty percent. Most of my symptoms were completely situational and the lifestyle changes I have pursued and created have been the catalyst to my stability and recovery.
As always I will keep track of my recovery and share it with you all when I get a chance to. Hope everyone has a great week and stays committed to their recovery.
Sincerely,
Marc
