@stcrmwtch in response to the panic attack
Bucky wakes up with a jolt, gasping into the darkness. It’s not uncommon for him to have a nightmare (Hydra, the war, the camps, the countless battles, it doesn’t matter; sometimes, his brain gets creative and mingles everything), but it’s the first nightmare he has while sleeping next to Leah. And yeah, maybe he thought she was like a magical cure for his sleep and let his guard down –– idiotic, really, he could have hurt her, it could have been that kind of nightmare. The mere idea of hurting Leah, the one good thing in his life, makes his stomach lurch into his chest and overwhelming anxiety grips his heart. He stumbles off the couch and into the bathroom because it’s the closest thing with a door, and he needs to put himself away from her quickly.
His heart is racing as he grabs the edge of the tub with sweaty hands and kneels down, trying to breathe through the dizziness and nausea. His right hand is tingling and trembling; the left is unshakeable and the only thing keeping him on his knees right now, especially when the door behind him opens (did he forget to lock it?) and Leah appears in his visual field. “No, you––” Bucky barely hears himself over his own pounding heart. A chill runs down his spine, and he needs to squeeze his eyes shut to keep himself from throwing up. “I’m g-good. I’ll be back out. In a – in a minute Just… go.”












