#stepford smilers

[amanitaknowsbest]

Hmmmm

Ummmmmm

Aaaah hah, yup

[ase-trollplays]

Tag your Bad End Ship™, the one that ended or will end in complete tragedy. I want to see how common they are.

[ase-trollplays]

Best wlw dynamic: smol butch and tol femme

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“Who the fuck do you think you are getting loud with my matessprit, huh mother fucker!? Talk to ME, bitch! I talk back! You goddamn fucking dumbasss, ssmall dick energy having basstard! Awful brave for ssomeone in revolver range! Nook whiffing, bulge munching sonuva--”

“Shasha, calm down. You don’t have to--”

“No! Fuck him! He raissed hiss fucking voice at you! No one disrespects you while I’m around to make them pay for it with their goddamn fucking blood! Lemme go! Let me go!!”

AKA When someone tries to get loud with your laid-back wife

[ase-trollplays]

Even if we can't find heaven, I'm gonna stand by you Even if we can't find heaven, I'll walk through hell with you Love, you're not alone, 'cause I'm gonna stand by you

I got overwhelmed by ship feels and had to make a thing.

@limetrolls

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Okay so I wanted to do a draw and needed to compare heights between Shadah (5′6″) and her mates Steume (9′) and I just

chRIST

STEUME PLZ SH R I N K

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Matesprit day plans

Cacoph is going to ask Persef out for a picnic in the park (They'll be eating at a picnic table because the ground is full of ants, which he Hates) and stargazing. He'll even bring a telescope he's had for sweeps and rarely uses so they can get a better look. He will give her a sappy poem he wrote and play a little song for her

Brandy is taking Junnie out to a romantic dinner date and a horror movie. He will also give her a box of bite-sized pieces of livers from various castes since she likes those more than chocolate. He will also give her chocolates.

Dantli and Thiomi are going to have a romantic night in. They'll cook a nice meal for each other, then spend the night snuggling and sweet talking each other. Dantli will give her a small fur blanket he made himself from various animals, and Thiomi will give him the biggest box of chocolate (imagine a five pound box of chocolate) she could find.

Shadah's taking Steume to the most expensive and fanciest highblood restaurant in the city and treat her to as many courses as she wants. Afterward, they'll go to the toy store, and she'll buy Steume the biggest plushie she (Steume) can carry.

Karell is taking Proxus and Prokyn on a date together. They're going to go to a couple's night at a pottery shop and get casts of them (Karell and Proxus + Karell and Prokyn) holding hands.

Sonja (Comedy) is taking Engela to the opera. He bought her the most elegant and luxurious and beautiful dress money can buy and even had it tailored for her. As far as gifts, he's going to give her a diamond and gold charm bracelet to match the charm bracelet she gave him when they first became matesprits.

Maeron and Raisit are going to have a nice romantic dinner, then spend the entire rest of the night in her playroom doing things I cannot say outside of the naughty blog.

Takimi will let Noodle leave to spend time with his matesprit -- She'll insist on it, even -- but she'll be a massive anxiety ball until he comes back.

[ase-trollplays]

"I love you, Shasha~<3"

"Yeah... I love you, too. <3"

"I love you sooo~ much."

"Oh yeah? How much?"

"I would die for you. <3"

"... WHAT. No, no, abssolutely not!! You are not allowed to do that!"

"I ju--"

"No! I forbid you to die for me! You're not allowed to die before me anywayss, but esspecially not that way! If you pull that sself-ssacrificce sshit, I will go to Hell and drag you back mysself!!"

"Okay..."

"Good, glad we got that ssettled. ... Promisse me you won't?"

"I promise."

"Good. I... I couldn't handle lossing you. Not like that."

@limetrolls