#sternenschleier

[sternenkrone-blog]

sternenschleier replied to your post:   “I can’t believe I’m being bullied by people I...

hello, yet another drama queen :D

  “Okay, rude.”

[sternenkrone-blog]

Oh. Yojae blinks in surprise for a few moments before he pulls back. His eyes are wide in both realization and astonishment, and he immediately presses their foreheads together. "Our... our bond? Is it just me, or is it back?" he murmurs out softly, voice laced with wonder and fondness. "I didn't even notice. Just... wow. I like sensing you. A lot."

  “I… don’t know,” says Xander truthfully. It hadn’t occurred to him until this moment that something changed, so caught up in piecing this situation together and giving Yojae as much comfort as possible. Somewhere along the line, their bond must have mended, at least a little. Where there was a swell of negativity before lingers surprise now, paired with something Xander can’t describe as anything but relief.  He curls his arms back around Yojae, closing his eyes. “All I know is that I’ve been feeling miserable since we stopped by Qiaomeng’s place and that it really made no sense for me. But I didn’t think far enough to actually question it.”  It’s clear as day that much of what had been weighing him down – what continues to weigh him down – is courtesy of Yojae’s emotions. For Xander, the source of discomfort and anxiety is seeing Yojae so upset, not the fact that he’s forged this connection.  And yet, the patch of emptiness within him persists. Their bond is far from whole.  Leaning down, Xander buries his face in the crook of Yojae’s neck, kissing gently at the skin. He hugs him tighter to himself, reaching his mind’s feelers out again to drink in as much of that overwhelming relief as possible. It’s soothing in a way words can’t describe, like healing balm over an aching spot. The tension seeps out of his shoulders.   “I still can’t pick up on your thoughts.” Xander can’t help but frown, although he’d suspected as much. “But it’s… it’s something. Better.”

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Yojae shifts to nose into the crook of his beloved's neck. "But I did, even if I couldn't know what I'm doing," he replies while shivering slightly at Xander's touch. "Imagine that happening to me - us - with Meng accidentally tying our magic together so that he can hear you and I can hear Kiryu. I'd have wanted a choice in such an important matter too, you know? It isn't fair that Seokkie and him never get to decide that now."

  “Would they have said yes if you gave them the choice? It sure as hell didn’t sound like it.” Jiseok’s shocked face as realization settled in is still fresh in Xander’s memory. Eyes wide and lips parted, every word laced with dread. It can’t be this terrible. Yojae’s magic did what Yojae was too shy to do himself. If anything, his friends should be apologizing for making him feel alienated in the first place. Even if it wasn’t their intention.  Xander heaves a sigh. If only he understood more about this. But they both have no other choice but to rely on what Qiaomeng and the others tell them. Which hasn’t been much.  “What’s done is done. Did it change anything? I really don’t see the issue.” He doesn’t see why it makes Yojae feel so guilty, either. An accident is an accident. Their bond is so heavy with it that it’s almost unbearable.  Xander stills. Their bond? He reaches out with his mind. Their bond.  “Yojae.” He draws back, brows furrowed deeper than before, holding Yojae at a slight distance. “You haven’t told me how you feel, have you? How come I still know?”

[sternenkrone-blog]

He's just going to bury his face against his familiar's chest and wrap his arms around Xander's frame. Obviously, there is a lot on his mind, but for now, he simply seeks out the other’s warmth in a means to comfort himself somehow.

  Xander would be lying if he said he understood any of this.  He’d listened to Qiaomeng and Jiseok’s explanations, but little of it had made sense. Yojae forged some sort of connection between them on accident, and it turned out upsetting for whatever reason.   The worst part, though, is the constant stream of guilt and regret spilling through his and Yojae’s own bond.  Brows furrowed, he returns the embrace, one palm cupping the back of Yojae’s head. There must be worse things for Yojae’s friends than this. Why are they acting so strange?  “… stop that.” Xander grimaces against the new wave of emotion. It claws at his chest, razor-sharp. “You did nothing wrong. They’re just being stupid.” He cards his fingers through Yojae’s hair, slips his other hand beyond the hem of his shirt to caress the skin underneath. “You know that, right?”

[sternenkrone-blog]

Words aren’t always needed between them.

In the evening, long after dinner, Kiryu finds his lover in the living room, mind anywhere but in the present. He isn’t surprised, to say the least. Meng said that he needs some time to himself - to process everything that has happened a few hours ago. Ending up in a circle isn’t something either of them have ever considered.

Personally, Kiryu loves the concept of covens and has treated their little group as such despite them never having gone through a ritual of sorts. They are family, tight-knitted and always there to welcome new faces as long as they fit into their group. It’s one of the reasons why their group keeps growing - slowly but steadily.

As much as he knows how much Meng treasures everyone, founding a coven has always been out of question given all the rules and what not. Meng is a rebel at heart, stubborn in his own way to an extent that caused the two of them to butt heads regularly on a daily basis. He always stays away from regulations as much as he can.

So ending up in a circle is just… unexpected.

With a purr, Kiryu takes a seat next to his lover, his whole body curled up and head gently bumping against Meng’s arm. He doesn’t need their bond to know that Meng is thinking way too much again, and when the other doesn’t react at all to his nudges, Kiryu shifts and takes his seat on Meng’s lap.

“– hey there,” he hums out softly while wrapping his arms around his beloved’s neck. A small smile steals its way on his lips. “You’re going to get wrinkles, love.”

    It’s only when Kiryu shifts in that silent way of his, the elegance of his movements a familiar blur in his periphery, that Qiaomeng’s attention snaps towards him. He shoots him a smile that’s meant as an apology, but it’s small and strained. He holds tightly onto the book he’d been skimming with one hand. “That bad? Might need t’consider not thinkin’ so hard anymore, then.”      There’s no need to elaborate. Kiryu reads his mind like it’s his own and vice versa, and though Qiaomeng usually doesn’t mind, he sometimes can’t help but wish that he could have a moment or two longer to sort through the thoughts in his head. They’re jumbled and explosive so often.      He clears his throat, curling his free arm loosely around Kiryu’s waist. “I’ve been, um, doin’ some readin’. There’s little information about this stuff, like I said. It’s a li’l irritatin’, t’be honest.” The concept of a circle is more to his liking than that of a proper coven, and under other circumstances, Qiaomeng would not be this bothered. This flustered. The residue of Yojae and Jiseok’s magic still clings to his skin, sticky and sparking every so often. It isn’t unpleasant, but it isn’t comfortable, either.      “See, this is –” he says and holds the book up for Kiryu to read. A couple of passages on the double page are highlighted green, the color slightly smudged where Qiaomeng went over the paper too fast. “A bit of history. Circles are a pretty old tradition. When covens became a thing, most witches were drawn t’those. ‘cause rules ‘nd magic are a good combination. Usually.” He flips the page. Again, several passages are highlighted. “Like I said, it’s passed down by word of mouth, so there’s little documentation about… the hows. Sorry, I’m a li’l frazzled.”     Qiaomeng shuts the book and places it on the empty cushion next to him. “Frazzled” barely scratches the surface. Until the day he dies, he and Kiryu are inextricably connected to Yojae and Jiseok. As great as the idea is, it sows anxiety and dread in him. Not because of that bond. But because of how it came to be.     Exhaling a groan, he leans forward, curling his other arm around Kiryu, too, and buries his face against his neck. Kiryu’s scent brings him immediate comfort, though it’s minimal at best. The fog in his chest is too thick to be pierced so easily. “I’m makin’ a big deal outta this, I know I am. I just – gods, I would’ve liked t’be asked. Would’ve liked a warnin’, or… fuck, I didn’t even know Yojae knew how t’do this. But I s’pose he himself didn’t, either.”     He draws back to take a long look at Kiryu, he softness of his face. He has him, at least, solid and warm at his side as he always is. Always ready to try and pull him out of his head, all gentle hands and determination. Qiaomeng kisses the corner of his lips. “Am I worryin’ you, baby? I’ll… come around t'this, eventually. It’s a good thing. I’m just… I wasn’t prepared fer that kinda connection.”

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"A.. a what now?" Even after so long, there's still things he doesn't know of yet. Yojae blinks at the other two, his whole body leaned into Jiseok's embrace while he hugs Xander close. "Is.. is that circle thing a bad thing?"

    “… usually, it’s not.” Again, Qiaomeng furrows his brows. “It’s… y’know about covens, right? Witches comin’ t’gether t’establish a deeper bond. Usually, they don’t knit their magic, though. It’s more… like a group? A club? I dunno. It’s got rules and shit. Not my cup of tea. Circles, though? That’s… deeper. Intimate, in a way. But they’re dying out ‘cause it’s somethin’ passed down by word of mouth, not like rituals t’form covens. Plus, there’s… consequences. You can’t separate that bond, and if someone tries…”    Jiseok frowns. “If someone tries to separate it, everyone in the Circle dies. It’s… not something you decide on a whim.” He looks up at Yojae, not letting him go in spite of his words. “You couldn’t know that was going to happen. Just… you need to be more careful with your magic. This is really serious.”

[sternenkrone-blog]

And, oh. Bring called out like this comes with a wave of embarrassment, causing him to flush while he tries to hide his blush. It's supposed to be a secret, after all, so having Meng being do spot on makes him want to crawl into a hole for good. "I-- maybe." He buries his face in Xander's hair. "It's just that.. fleeting feeling that's there sometimes, that Xander and I are on our own. That we don't really.. belong, somehow.. sorry." He curls up more into his familiar.

    The atmosphere changes in a heartbeat. Jiseok drops his book and throws his arms around Yojae, tugging him close. Xander stiffens at it, but lets him do as he pleases.    “No, what? Why would you think that? You’re part of this!” A deep sadness rings through Jiseok’s response, and maybe it’s just the lighting, but his eyes sparkle with a sheen of wetness. “Part of us.”    Qiaomeng wholeheartedly agrees, though he keeps it to himself. Yojae was supposed to know that – supposed to know that the moment he walked in, they all accepted him without a word of protest. He’s more than a young witch in need of a guidance. He’s a friend, a dear one. Running a hand through his hair, Qiaomeng sighs. Yojae’s admission tugs at him in the most painful of ways, clawing at his heartstrings. He’d been lonely, more so before Xander came into his life, but Qiaomeng didn’t imagine it was this bad. Didn’t want to imagine.

    “I’m sorry. Really sorry. Didn’t mean t’put you on th’spot like that.” His assumption had been nothing but a shot in the dark. Knowing he was right makes him ache for Yojae. “But that… explains it. Y'were lookin’ fer a connection, ‘nd yer magic established it fer you.”     Jiseok draws back, eyes wide. “I’ve heard about this. Witches bonding their magic together. My aunt was part of something like this before she – anyway, it’s called a Circle. But I didn’t know it worked on accident, too.”

[sternenkrone-blog]

Yojae simply pouts while hugging Xander closer to himself. "Hey, don't blame me. Seokkie's magic is all warm and gentle, while Meng's magic feels so powerful that one wrong move is probably enough to knock the air out of your lungs. So of course I'd rarher go to Seokkie first." Kiryu snickers through the bond at that, obviously amused about the comparison. "That's a pretty accurate description, actually."

    “Says the walkin’ earthquake.” Qiaomeng shoots Yojae a look that’s equal parts amused and fond. “Y’don’t get t’talk about my magic like that when yers is just as bad. Need I remind you of th’many side effects even simple stuff has when it’s you who has his hands on it?” It’s fun, most of the time, but Qiaomeng dreads the day when Yojae’s magic causes serious harm. As much as he’s been working on it, it’s still not fully under his control. Else they wouldn’t be in this situation.    Jiseok reaches for one of the books and begins flipping through the pages. One side of his mouth is curled upwards in a shy smile. “Thanks for the compliment, anyway. What are we looking for? It’s not really a spell, is it? More like a soulbond… but aren’t those done with incantations, too?”    Qiaomeng gives a one-shouldered shrug. “Most of th’time. Intent works just as well. But that wasn’t really th’purpose, so I s’pose Yojae’s magic went ahead and did what it wanted. Or… “ He halts, tilting his head to the left. “Have you been feelin’… left out, or somethin’? Like y’don’t really belong?”