Are there any that could be used by husband and wife for example dragon and phoenix? Also are spiders ever used? Or wolves?
The dragon and the vermillion bird are associated with masculine and feminine, so they make an excellent pairing for a couple! They complement one another in a lot of ways. I go into detail about the celestial symbols, including Dragon and Vermillion Bird HERE
(note that while some sources will translate the vermillion bird as a pheonix or "chinese pheonix", they are different creatures. Phoenixes are Greecian, and while both are associated with fire, and the cycles of life and death, the vermillion bird lacks the power of rebirth that defines a pheonix. This could just be me being pendantic, since the same could be said of the Ryuu/Long vs the western europian "dragon." It's just as a mythology buff I think it's an important distinction, especially if we are talking about depicting creatures in art.)
You can also look into the many myths and folk tales about love from Japan. There are many. One with a lot of symbolism and imagery is the story of Orihime (the weaver princess) and Hikoboshi (a cow hearder), two lovers that were seperated by their godly parents after they neglected their jobs, distracted by their love. They were placed as stars on opposite sides of the Milky Way. Once a year they reunite when a flock of magpies forms a bridge for them to cross and reunite on the 7th day of the 7th month.
As for spiders and wolves: yes and yes! Both crop up in Japanese folklore quite a bit. Spiders are often associated with seductive women, though there are a few straightforward spider monsters, like the Ushi-oni.
Japanese wolves are near extiction today, but they were once worshiped like many other animals. Japanese wolf species are much smaller than American and European species, and so were less of a threat and more helpful pest control. Some myths still depict them as potentially viscious, like the Senbiki Okami, a pack of 100 intellegent wolves that will form a ladder to catch prey from the trees. Like foxes, cats, and tanuki, wolves could be shape-shifters. They could be protectors or attackers; good luck or harbingers of death.
As always I recomend yokai.com and ukiyo-e.org for researching creatures and designs. They are fantastic, searchable resources that are very accessible to an english-speaking researcher. (not all my resources are! it's a pain!)
