#strawbebblah

[strawberryplottwist]

I remember as a kid, I read a story about a girl who helped an old woman in the woods, and as thanks, the old woman cast a spell so that jewels would fall out of the girl's mouth whenever she spoke. The girl's cruel stepsisters, upon learning of this, seek out the old woman, who curses them so that bugs and snakes fall from their mouths when they speak instead of jewels. The moral of the story is to be kind to people, but to me, all three spells sounded like horrible punishments. Imagine trying to speak around jewels falling out of your mouth! Not to mention the social consequences of it - people only talking to you so that they could collect the jewels you make when you speak, exploiting you for something you didn't even ask for!

[strawberryplottwist]

Book 22: A Line in the Dark by Malinda Lo

I didn't intend to take so long between books, but I've been really exhausted and stressed lately, and I had to talk myself into even starting one book that I then had to beg for external permission not to finish because I disliked it so much. And then I decided to go back to Malinda Lo, who is one of my favorite contemporary authors, and I have precisely zero regrets.

I read this entire book today. I want to go back and reread the entire thing immediately. I will be thinking about this book for a long, long time. Holy shit. The characters are grounded and realistic, rich and fleshed out and flawed and wonderful and human, to the point that I found myself thinking multiple times that I've never seen an awkward teenager depicted so accurately before. The interpersonal dynamics are incredible too, in that heightened way that captures what it's like to be a teenager.

The plot, the central mystery and tension, are so intricately crafted. Each new piece of information adds another facet of understanding, and every gap where something is missing feels like the spot in your gums where a tooth used to be, like a missing stair that definitely used to be there - glaringly obvious in its emptiness. The use of perspective is so crunchy and textured, and really highlights the intentional withholding of information. There is a constant feeling of something just out of sight, like if you're clever enough, you can split the page and find the rest between the layers of ink and paper.

And the epilogue. Oh my god, the epilogue.

10/10, holy recontextualization, Batman

[strawberryplottwist]

The ideal blorbo dynamic is "unhealthily dedicated three person queerplatonic polycule". I am not accepting criticism at this time

[strawberryplottwist]

What kind of monster puts midroll ads every 6-7 minutes on an ASMR video???

[strawberryplottwist]

Guess who had to replace his phone against his will today 🙃

[strawberryplottwist]

I don't want to be alone. I could go on about the why and the how and the what, but... I just don't want to be alone.

[strawberryplottwist]

Book 21: The Other Olympians by Michael Waters

I finished this book yesterday on the plane home from visiting a couple of friends for the weekend. I also wrote up my thoughts while still on the plane. If anything is less coherent or inconsistent, it's because of that.

In deciding what to read after The Murderbot Diaries, I figured something as different as possible would be the best option, so I chose a non-fiction book with approximately 70 pages of combined citations and index. I think that was a good decision, as the stark difference made it easy not to compare the two, though I did still find myself wishing I had more Murderbot to read.

It is deeply depressing how relevant the subject of this book is. The Other Olympians details the origins of sex testing in women's sports. It follows the lives of a number of trans men track and field athletes, and how their transitions were misunderstood, misremembered, and misapplied by international sports officials in order to control women's sports. The majority of the officials involved in implementing this testing during the 1936 Olympics were either Nazis themselves or Nazi sympathizers, and much of their rhetoric, and ideas that arose from it, is still used to justify sex testing and sex segregation in sports to this day.

I could go on and on about the history detailed in this book, but too much of it would just be stating and re-stating my anger and frustration in increasingly hyperbolic language. I think anyone with any interest in sports regulation, sports history, the politics of gender, or queer history should read this book.

10/10, a very well-researched and galvanizing text that should be read far and wide

[strawberryplottwist]

The best mental health of my entire life occurred when I was in chemically-induced menopause for about a year, which could mean nothing