"But just"/"Why don't you just?" is not always the magic solve you think it is, boomers
Feeling a little disheartened today by the way that my mum point-blank refuses to acknowledge structural barriers. And I do think it is at least partially a generational thing.
The thing about the deck being stacked against you that has the most impact, and that certain folk of a certain age seem unable to put together is that...
You reach a point in your life, or in your career, or in your day to day financial situation where not only is there no magical solution, there are also no good options.
And it's the kind of situation where it's not the case where there are no good options because you, the individual, made mistakes or burned bridges or wasted your starting out nest egg or your initial savings so you have only yourself to blame - or even where if you just reduced your basic outgoings down several levels you'd be able to build a nest egg (back) up in order to give yourself more options again... There just aren't any good options from the jump.
Recent solves my mum has put to me as if I'm not an adult, in my 30s, living independently in another country from her with over 10 years' working experience, include:
Why don't you just get a higher paying job?
Why don't you get a pension?
Why don't you buy a house?
Why don't you move further away from your work (and your established community and the amenities you rely on) so you can buy a house?
The undertone implication is a) that we haven't already considered all the options before us, done the calculations and concluded that (unfortunately, as if it worked out it would be helpful) it isn't viable right now, and b) that by not doing these things you are somehow deliberately crafting your own misery and setting yourself up for more hardship, instead of the reality that we are making the best of what's available to us within the system that is how our generation are asked to live and exist.
I don't 'just get a higher paying job' because the structural barriers are my lack of education and my lack of social connections among the higher strata of the demographic that, by their wealth-funded access to as many qualifications as they would like to pay for, and by being able to buy the time to complete them, holds a monopoly on hiring. That's something that's come from making education something available to the highest bidder, rather than grant-funded and obtainable by anyone with the capacity to qualify for the course.
I don't have a pension (right now) because I can't afford one. The minimum contribution that I can make by law to a pension is 10% of my income a month, and I can't afford to lose an extra 10% of my income when I'm already paying around that out of my salary to a student loan with compound interest that was sold to me as a loan that wouldn't have compound interest added. I'm also paying 50%+ of my income per month on housing alone, and more on bills. Where am I supposed to find more? And of course, if my salary goes up, so too does the amount I'm meant to pay back the student loan.
I don't buy a house because I can't afford one, despite saving for a deposit for several years. Unfortunately, Liz Truss crashed the economy last year and as a result, the banks don't offer mortgages as high as they used to, and require larger deposits for properties. As such the amount that I have saved up might have been enough to put down a healthy deposit two years ago, but now, isn't. And I can't save any more because of the aforementioned draws on my income above.
And if I was to move further afield to buy a house, what's the benefit to me? I'd have to spend more money on my commute, I'd probably have to live in a much less safe area, and it's going to be cold comfort to me that I own a property if I end up getting assaulted or stabbed on my way home at night.
Trust me, I would love to live in an era where I didn't have to overthink these basics. Where the fact that I have a college degree and multiple years of specialised work experience across multiple sectors including private business and government would actually count for something and afford me a solid and stable standard of living.
But it doesn't any more. And this is my life, and the lives of many of us nowadays. And we can't just sit and mope about it, we have to accept it, and adapt, and do the best we can to keep going until something gets a little easier for us, until the luck of the draw rolls our way or until someone with the power and ability through government or big business to effect a real change takes that shot and acts to make things just that bit less bleak for us.
Until then, a little empathy wouldn't hurt instead of a lecture.
