May 1, 2025
Being a veteran teacher is NOT bursting into laughter when your middle school student turns around during silent work time and, apropos of literally nothing, shouts to his friend across the room, "WHOA! IT’S (FIRSTNAME) 'SUCKDICK' (LASTNAME)!!!!" and instead sending him out to get his mom called.
12 year olds are unfortunately the funniest people alive but I am not allowed to let them know that sometimes.
(Told my spouse this and he wanted to start referring to friends like this. "Aw Hell, it's Brian "Suckdick" Wright! Good ol suckdick! And if it ain't Mikey 'Suckdick' Johnson!")