I know why people like the aesthetics of being dumbed down, but it's never been for me. I do get it on some level. I have some speculations but I might be projecting.
What does get me though? The idea that for as smart as I can be, it did nothing to help me. I was clever enough to recognize that my mind was being messed with, but being clever didn't really help. That even though I was able to see and understand what was happening, I could do nothing to stop it from happening.
I'm aware enough to know that I've been brainwashed. That I'm still being brainwashed. I'm clever enough to see how you're doing it to me. And I can figure out how to escape. But my addled and manipulated mind won't let me do it. The key to the cell is within reach, but my mind won't let me reach outside the bars. Escape is possible, it's right there, but I can't do it.