#super you

[mayamir]

One of my favorite host Luria Petrucci interviewing Andy and Kay Walker authors of one of the amazing books I’ve read recently. You should check it out even if you did not read SuperYou yet.

[lighteninguptogether]

WWHPD?

What would a healthy person do? This is my new mantra.  While I myself don’t feel like I am a healthy person, I can imagine what a healthy person would do and maybe I can just fake it till I make it. This idea was suggested in a book I am reading (Super You by Emily V Gordon) which is awesome and comforting to listen to.  She basically says: Coming to a deep understanding about yourself does not…

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[chaoskilledthedinos]

You are valuable. You are complex. You are substantial-you take up space. And you don't need to be understandable to anyone but yourself.

Emily V. Gordon, "Super You"

[myprivatelibrary]

Putting your partner on a pedestal essentially guarantees two things: that you won't be able to build any real intimacy, and that the person will disappoint you.  No one can last on a pedestal.  Everyone is flawed and will eventually show those flaws- and then you'll be left wondering what you've been worshipping the whole time.  Don't treat a partner like gold.  Treat a partner like a person you like and respect and also want to make out with.

Super You, Emily V. Gordon, p. 255

[myprivatelibrary]

How sad it is and suffocating it is to have your future mapped out by other people, or by things that happened years ago.  How sad to have your story told by other people.  How sad is it that we allow others to write our origin stories for us- that we internalize others' views of us instead of constructing our own.  Because we aren't just good kids, bad employees, weird classmates, super-moms, lonely girls, or gorgeous perfect princesses.  We aren't what we've been called, good or bad, throughout our lives.  But some of us spend our lives trying to fulfill a role that was handed to us by someone else.  Bosses, parents, exes, friends: they can all tell the story of you- but would their version be faithful to who you are?

Super You, Emily V. Gordon, p. 202

[myprivatelibrary]

...as social beings, we all want to feel needed.  For some, however, there is comfort in the idea that if you do literally everything for a friend or a boss or a romantic partner, you'll in effect be indispensable, and others won't leave you.  You'll be necessary, like oxygen!  But please hear me now, dear reader: in relationships, each person should function as vitamins for the other person, not oxygen.

Super You, Emily V. Gordon, p. 163

[myprivatelibrary]

Think about it this way: Superman's weakness is Kryptonite, right?  And yet, he doesn't call himself Kryptonite Man.  Well, you may say, how stupid would that be?  You'd just be advertising your weak points to strangers.  And yet, so many of us define ourselves by our weaknesses rather than by our superpowers.  In fact, many of us walk around weakness first, apologizing for ourselves right out of the gate.

Super You, Emily V. Gordon, p. 160