confusedoptimist replied to your post: I don't get WHY people voting for a ship in which...
I don’t do fandom polls specifically because they tend to get toxic and competition is not what I want out of my entertainment but I want to jump in here and say that Katie has always been super accepting of her gay fans and Melissa has been pretty gracious with supercorp shippers, and has been happy to sign fanart and such. I really hate these so and so is homophobic rumors because it sucks for kids to think their faves hate them…
Oh, yeah, that’s important too. I totally forgot that that was even in the ask because I had no idea about any of it, but thanks for the clarification. And also, even if had been true, shipping to spite actors is not a bad reason. >_>
“Every moment happens twice: inside and outside, and they are two different histories.”
― Zadie Smith
——
It takes time for Kara to tell Lena she loves her.
She starts and stops the words over and over in her head, in the park, in her apartment, on the street, and even once as a whisper against the shell of her ear, pressed into her side after falling asleep on the couch, the credits of movie flickering on the tv and her heartbeat settled into sleep.
And it's a silly thing, really.
But one way or another, the words would always get caught or slip away.
Would get mixed up, or maybe lost, in the ache of heart instead of its need.
Would wind up tasting bitter instead of saccharine, like it was trying to protect itself from the only thing of love it's ever really known — loss.
But Lena is not a dying planet. She is not a lost language.
She is warmth and light and the possibility of new things.
And yet, it still takes time.
To let the words out, to untangle them, to rearrange until they taste only of Lena. Her skin, her lips. Until her heart lets gives into its need. Her laugh. Her smile.
And she will admit it was selfish to want keep those parts of Lena to herself when she finally she did.
And she will admit it was foolish to think it would last.
But she never could have told you that telling the the rest of the world she loved Lena would happen like this.
----
"You should just tell her."
Alex says, eyeing Kara over her cup of coffee.
"I can't just blurt it out like that." Kara sighs
"Kara..." Alex's voice is tinged with both amusement and frustration. "You've been saying you're going to tell her for months now."
"I-I don't know." Kara looks down at her hands, fidgeting with the edge of her cape.
"You know she loves you too, right?" Alex asks, her tone softening.
"I know." Kara nods, trying to hide both the smile on her face and the crinkle in her brow, both of which might give her away."
"You know I love you too right?"
"Yeah." She mumbles. "She really doesn't like keeping this from Alex."
Alex laughs "Good."
"But also know she will understand."
----
Kara lets out a content sigh and breathes in the faint scent of cedar and citrus as Lena tucks her head against her neck, arms tightening around her back as she shifts them further into their tangled position.
"Alex thinks I should tell you how I feel about you."
Lena chuckles, and the sound reverberates into Kara's chest.
"Oh. And how do you feel about me, Ms. Danvers."
Lena looks up at her with shining eyes and a slight smile on her lips.
"I feel like I love you, and I never want to leave this bed." She presses a gentle kiss to the underside of Lena's jaw.
"Mmm," Lena stretches, "well, that might be a problem if we want to keep this rouse up since your Sister and our friends are coming in a little less than 30 minutes."
"Loving you is not a rouse," Kara insists, "you know that right?"
"Of course". Lena turned her head to press a kiss along Kara's forearm. "I enjoy this too, you know. There aren't many things in my life that I ever get to do without the world knowing."
Her lips curved in a hint of a smile.
"But you should also know that apparently, there is a bet among our friends about when we will get together. Brainy accidentally told me about it in the lab yesterday."
Kara leans back into the pillow, startling Lena.
"What! Really?"
Lena laughs and pecks her lips once more before rolling out of bed, pulling her along with her.
----
Kara is hyperaware of the points of contact between them — their hands accidentally touching when she reaches for her cup, their shoulders pressed together as she sits down.
"Careful, darling." Lena murmurs from beside her.
Kara looks over at her, noticing the slightly bent fork in her hand.
Lena's lips quirked up into a smile, and she reached out to take it from her and replace it with her own unmarred one.
Lena's hand settles on hers.
"Relax, Darling."
It's soft.
Kara looks between Lena and the rest of the group.
Lena settles her hand on her knee, fingers inching just ever so slightly up.
So so soft.
Alex gives her a weird look.
"What's going on with you?
She looks around the room.
Looks at the mess of smiles and laughter and brightness.
She thinks about the bet they all have. Thinks about Lena in her arms that afternoon. There's a comfort that settles in both. The fact that their friends and family all felt like her loving Lena was just as inevitable as she had.
And it was.
Inevitable.
Even it took time.
And this, she supposes what happens next was inevitable too.
Even if it took time.
She stands up, nearly knocking the coffee table over, and reaches into her pocket, grabbing a fist full of wrinkled bills and, without even bothering to count them, shoves them down on the coffee table.
And it feels a little less like betting against her friends, and than against the universe itself.
"I take today...I bet on today."
Alex looks at the crumpled pile of money and her sister, confused.
Kara thinks maybe Lena was wrong about the bet.
But then Nia is giggling and Kelly has her head in her hands, and Brainy if trying hide from Alex who is staring right at him.
And she knows she wasn't.
Lena's tugs at the bottom of her sweater.
"That's, that's not really how betting works Darling."
But Kara has already started talking, or rather rambling.
"I..." and she barely even gets past the first letter, not even to the first syllable, before the words start to sip, but then Lena's hand slips from her sweater into her palm and the she's looking at her with all that softness of hers, and Rao, Kara realizes how much she really, really wants to let the world know how much she loves this woman.
"I-love Lena...that's...I just...that's...I love her and I love kissing her and you should all know that."
Lena looks at Alex who is looking at Kara who still hasn't dared to at anyone but Lena.
Kara isn't sure she realizes that everyone leaves, but she remembers their bright smiles, hears the not very subtle "told you" Nia yells at one point, sees the hug that Brainy give Lena, and watches Kelly's soft wave as she presses a quick kiss to Alex's temple and tells her she'll meet her in the car.
Alex steps in front of her, blocking her view of Lena temporarily.
"You know you're Girlfriend's right...this isn't really how betting works."
Her cheeks tinge pink with embarrassment as she looks at the money again.
But Lena is still there, still has her hand.
"It was very sweet of you though," she said. "I think we can let the betting technicalities slide just this once."
And then Alex leaves too. With a knowing look and soft pat on her shoulder and with Kara promising to call her in the dawning.
"You feeling okay?" Lena asks when it's just them.
Kara nods, lacing their fingers together. "I know we said we could wait, but I
just...you know..."
Lena smiles, bringing Kara's hand up to kiss her palm.
