Scars and Insecurities
-side note: I have no clue what this is, but it came from the fact that my skin has been really bad bc of the stress from the lovely world we live in and I’ve gone back to exclusively wearing long sleeves and pants 24/7.... Anyway, please enjoy my 5am projection onto Billy-
Steve walked into their bedroom, looking down as he finished tucking in his shirt. He looked up, only to be met with the sight of Billy staring vacantly at their shared closet.
“Baby, what’s going on? We have to leave soon, why aren’t you ready?” Steve asked, voice gentle. He had seen a similar expression on his boyfriend’s face thousands of times before, mostly after he had just been released from the hospital after the whole mess at Starcourt Mall, when the memories of everything were too fresh. Now, almost two years later though, the expression was coming less and less as everyone moved on to new parts of their lives.
“I don’t know what to wear.” Billy’s voice came out cracked and thick, almost as if he were holding back tears, but that couldn’t be right? Steve could count on one hand the amount of times he had seen Billy cry. He was more likely to react with fists than tears.
“What do you mean Silly? It’s a party, just wear what you always wear.”
That got Billy’s attention, in the worst way. He spun on his heel, and marched toward Steve. His face was set in a twisted snarl, but his rage was diminished by the tears streaming steadily down his face.
“Listen here Harrington,” he spit, acidic venom lacing every syllable. “You don’t get it. I can’t just wear what I used to wear. You think I can just go out into the world bearing this shit?” He said as he ripped off his undershirt. The scars from his final stand off against the Mind Flayer stood out in, pale and faintly shimmering against the rest of his tan toned torso. “There’s no more fucking half buttoned shirts in my future bucko.”
He finally landed right in front of Steve, leaning in and panting in his face. Their eyes locked in a heated, wordless exchange before Steve finally got the nerve to reach out. He gently ran his fingertips over the raised skin, and the cool touch made Billy shiver. They were silent still as Steve traced the largest scar, right in the center of his chest. It spread out into small branches that twisted around and almost connected to the two on either side of Billy’s stomach. It was huge and impossible to hide when not covered by fabric.
Steve was the first to break the silence. He whispered softly, “It’s okay Billy. Let me help.” It was a parody of the phrase Steve had used so many times after Billy had been just released from the hospital, and the reminder made the muscles under Steve’s fingers tighten with tension.
“I’m not a fucking invalid.” Billy continued the well-worn script they had memorized long ago.
“I know baby, but it’s okay to ask for help.”
The tension diffused from Billy’s chest just the slightest in acceptance, and Steve took that as a sign to take a step back and begin to move towards their closet.
“How about this shirt and your leather jacket?” He asked, holding out a simple Ramones tee shirt. The fabric was worn soft from so many trips in the dryer, and the logo on the front was peeling away. It was his favorite shirt and Steve knew it.
“I guess-“ Billy began, but was forced to restart when his voice cracked. “I guess that would work.” He got out, voice stabilising with every word.
“Perfect. You look great in this. Oh, and pair it with that one pair of jeans. The dark ones that hug your ass.” Steve joked, licking his lips and looking Billy up and down dramatically. Billy just rolled his eyes at Steve’s antics and snatched the shirt from his boyfriend.
“Fine fine you horndog. Let me get dressed and then you can do my hair.”
“Yes!” Steve cheered. He loved playing with and styling Billy’s golden curls. They were always so soft and his shampoo smelled like home.
Billy got dressed and Steve decided a bun was the best way to style Billy’s outgrown mullet. They went to the party, a simple beach bonfire, and had a great night with great friends and great booze.
After they returned home, giggling and stumbling into their apartment at 3am, Steve peeled off the black tshirt and carefully traced Billy’s scares again, but this time with his tongue. He continued to worship Billy’s golden tanned body for a long time, until he had him practically squirming in anticipation.
When Billy finally ground out a “Get on with it already Pretty Boy,” Steve took that as his cue to fuck Billy into the mattress so hard he forgot all about his insecurities and doubts.
It was a good night, and next time Billy wore a shirt with the too two buttons undone. It wasn’t much, but Steve kept reminding Billy that is was progress
- @a-magey I swear I’m going to bed now!!-
