#swedenja

[a-lovely-journey]

P.A.

You knew this was coming. And you know how I feel about you. But now you will be able to understand the degree to which I valued your presence, far beyond any words I could have mustered the courage to express in person.

Jane Austen has said “my idea of good company is the company of clever, well-informed people who have a great deal of conversation”, and this is precisely what you are. What is interesting about a study-abroad experience is that it is hard to ever truly grasp the intellectual levels of your fellow abroad-ers since classes are dumbed down and work ethic is non-existent. But with you, your passions, desires, and creative ideas created a never ending list of potential business ventures, inventions, and tech-savvy solutions which provided a platform for your inner brilliance to shine.

Your endless rantings were the butt of many jokes, yet I can tell you that we all loved your circular stories with [mildly] amusing anecdotes. While you may already know that punctuality is not your forte, and neither is chopping vegetables, they added greatly to the many laughs we had together.

Your compassionate and gentle spirit was always present. You never hesitated to cover the bill, help me with something, or accompany me somewhere. Your infectious smile and kind eyes were always a welcomes sight. And I am even more content with how many conversations we could have about bowl activity; a sign which indicates true friendship for me.

I know that leaving Sweden was the end for many people, but it was not the end for you. Our friendship is one which doesn't require constant contact though emails, phone calls, or fancy dinners. You are like the wind, heard but not seen, filling in the empty, always with me. I will see you soon. Until then.

I am thankful for having met you I am thankful for becoming your friend I am thankful for your wise words I am thankful for your smiles I am thankful for you.

[a-lovely-journey]

My Friend

I haven’t written a post in a long time. Too long of a time. And I would apologize but I am not sorry, for I have been so deeply enjoying my last month here that I have lacked any motivation to share it with you. I guess this is selfish of me as everyone has not been blessed with the same travel opportunities I have had, so to this I feel some guilt. And so while I will commit to writing more about what has been happening lately in later posts, this one I want to address to someone in particular. The end of my study abroad adventure is drawing very near, and one by one many of the people in my program are starting to return to the States. While I have gotten to enjoy everyone’s company, it is obvious that some goodbyes will be much more difficult than others. And those “others” are people who ended up having a huge impact on me. Alex Jahani was one of them, and while I believe that many times my words are superfluous in comparison to my unspoken feelings, I nonetheless need to dedicate this to him. Alex is a person who comes around once in a lifetime. While many people may be like an Alex, reality only finds them far and few between. Alex was someone whose gentle spirit shown through his loud laugh, clever jokes, and sexy dance moves. And while I think that many people could see this alternate side, I don’t think even half truly understood it. I believe I was one that did. From our first serious talk on a bus to the airport, until the last under the stars atop an old wall in Visby, Alex proved to me that to understand someone’s soul you must look beyond the person they present to the world and instead look to the small details of their voice, their smile lines, and the shape of their hands. His voice was overflowing with love, compassion, understanding, and wonder. He spoke both like a young boy too eager to explore beyond his own doorstep, and an old man who has seen far too much for words to ever encompass. His smile lines told me stories of not only the amazing and euphoric moments life had given him so far, but of his personal struggles which his strength hid well from the rest of the world. His hands were strong. They were strong, yet gentle. They were expressive, and creativity flowered from them like spring blossoms. Every part of Alex told me something about his character. A character who was formed from a cultural who treats friends as family, and family as a part of their being. I saw Alex extend this form of love to countless people, many of which did not deserve it. But Alex did anyway, which proves how big of a person he was and continues to be. They say that the influence one has on people is the most powerful tool. Alex Jahani had a beautiful influence on me. Alex, thank you for the laughs we shared, the stories we exchanged, and the wisdom you gave me. My friend, I am so grateful that my life's journey led me to yours.

[a-lovely-journey]

I knew the second I met you that there was something about you I needed. Turns out it wasn’t something about you at all. It was just you.

Beautiful Disaster by Jamie McGuire, 5/11/2014

[a-lovely-journey]

Self

Nothing has happened in the past few weeks here that would stand out as exceptional, yet even so the days pass like moving shadows. Having just about finished the first week of April, people here seem to be counting down the days which we have left rather than how long we have been here which means the thought of departing and leaving our newly made friends behind is beginning to weigh on our shoulders. While I myself try to stay as positive and present as possible, the same thoughts have begun to creep into my mind, leading to many restless nights and teary eyes.

In about one week I will be heading to Norway for Easter break, and I cannot express how excited I am for home-cooked mom meals, comfy couches, and catch-up time with good friends. 

Recently I have really started to re-focus on my body (since I have the free time). I have increased my daily protein, increased weight lifting at the gym, and incorporated actual rest days for a change. While being in a relationship with someone who is very, very, into body building and supplemental nutrition definitely gives me extra motivation to sweat my butt off, I believe that I am (slowly) seeing results and my hope is that by the end of this semester I will be in the best shape of my life.

Speaking of relationships. As I have mentioned in the past I am a pretty private person, and divulging the status of my love life to the world is not one I have been too keen on. However, I have now known this wonderful person for over 2 months. And as common these adjectives are, they do not fail to express how I feel about him. Martin is wonderful. We click effortlessly, and the way we interact is that of best friends. We are both new at dating, and so the highs and lows and magic and kinks all are being experienced together. But he is amazing, what we have is amazing, and having to say goodbye will undoubtedly be one of the hardest things I will ever have to do. What I fear the most is that when that day does come, we will not agree as to where we will go from there. Nevertheless, I have never met anyone as spectacular as him, and if he ever reads this, I hope he knows how much of a positive impact he has made on me and my life. And how much he has helped me grow and love myself.  Thank you.

That is all for now, vi ses

[a-lovely-journey]

Bloodlines in Belgium

As I sit here finishing off the bag of Kashi heart-to-heart cheerios (which my mom so graciously sent to me for my birthday), I decided that I really have no excuse to not write a blog post about my week in Belgium*. *Warning: Kaity was not too fond of Belgium. I have always wanted to visit Belgium because my grandmother was born there. During WWII, my grandfather was stationed at her house and it was here where they met, fell in love, and married, followed by a life changing decision by part of my grandmother, to move to America.  As a history nerd, especially towards European history, I have always been interested in family tree, genealogy, and connecting with distant relatives. Being that I am studying in Sweden, I found there would be no better, or cheaper time, than now to swing south to Belgium. While flying into Brussels, my negative first impressions of the city were never proven otherwise. Not having experienced actual smog since my summer in China, Brussels greeted me with a solid smack to the face of smelly, industrialized air. The next day my cousin showed me the city for a solid 8 hours. I got to experience the bus, the metro, the infamous Grand Place, the Atomium, narrow cobblestone streets, churches, alleys, and weathered buildings. What was the best part? Eating the Liege waffle I bought off of a street cart. (Life. Was. Changed.) Really, the city held nothing to my particular interest or liking. Yes, there is a lot of beer. But beyond that, it is nothing more than another ordinary city. In my opinion, it holds no defining characteristics and I would recommend that if one is in Europe and deciding on a city to see, that Brussels would be at the bottom of the list.

I was lucky in the way that my Belgian family comes from the western part of Belgium: La Calamine. Here I got to experience the countryside, which I can say was much prettier than Brussels. Although the chilly weather put a damper on the days, I did enjoy this part of the country. Yet living there, for me, would be impossible. There are no stores, no people, even nothing that would implore outdoor adventures. Just old people, cows, and cobblestone. 

Since La Calamine is so close to the border, I also was able to visit Aachen, Germany and Maastricht, Netherlands. Instantaneously I liked these cities better, and if they are any reflection of their country as a whole than I can conclude that I would like both GE and NE much, much more than Belgium. They were cleaner, friendlier, and offered much more in terms of social activities.

Overall, though I may not have enjoyed the country, I enjoyed the opportunity and time I had with long lost family members. Since most of them are on the elderly side, it is likely that I will never see them again. And among the never ending stream of French which was spoken to me, I knew that they were grateful and happy that I had made the journey to meet them too.

Waffles. Chocolates. Frites. Beer. Cheese. Bread. Family. New friends. I may not have loved the country, but I got in touch with my heritage, and for that I can say that the trip was worth it. However, returning to Sweden had never felt more like home. Merci Belgique, et a tout a l'heure

[a-lovely-journey]

Honesty

Having my blog be centered around my travel experiences is great. I mean this honestly, as it has recently become quite clear to me that my world journeys are helping me find myself more than I could have ever expected; Which is why I think it is fair that I begin to not only catalog the things I see, people I speak to, and places I go, but share those moments of utter clarity and confusion, of pure joy and deep sadness, and of sheer gratitude and simple selfishness.

Since I am usually a very private person, this could end up being the first and the last post of its kind. But I am hoping that expressing the inner workings of my being to the world, with the idea that just one other person will be able to relate, be inspired, or even smile at what I've shared, will drive me to continue to allow some of me to overflow onto the shores of the globe.

You know the feeling when you have so much to say, yet you can not find the words to say any of it at all? As I sit here to try and neatly organize my thoughts, it seems I am aboard said boat. For almost the past two months I have been sharing some of my experiences here in Sweden spanning from gasques to observed cultural differences, and before that, I was sharing my whirlwind of a summer in China. Yet looking back, what I regret most is that for fear of what others would think, I did not archive any real, raw emotions. I may have posted about being angry, tired, or home sick, but nothing that was more than surface level. This time, it will be different. Everyone thinks that Western Europe is much like America. And to a fairly large extent it is: we wear similar clothing, we like similar food, and we are influenced by the same pop-culture. Yet there are many things, more so the littlest of things, which are innately different. And while I appreciate them, and enjoy experiencing them, lately they have made me miss home. Now I don't necessarily mean home home, but America in general.  I have been struggling the past few days with myself, as I am becoming more and more unsure of who I am and where I want to be (though maybe I am actually getting closer to finding the answers to these questions). While I always thought that my heart belonged somewhere else, it seems that I just needed to get away for a while to realize that it will forever be rooted in America. I love to travel. I am becoming the epitome of a global citizen. And I appreciate and never take for granted the opportunities, experiences, and beauty that this world provides me with every day. Each new sun brings twenty fours hours of laughs, smiles, idea exchange, unknowns, and recently even kisses. I accept and enjoy them all. But I am finding that the flag I enjoy looking upon the most is the one of my home country. Don't misunderstand me. There are not enough fingers to count the amount of climates I want to experience, sunsets I want to run along side, or foreign cuisines I'd like to indulge in. In truth I am hoping that my future careers will allow me to do such things. Ultimately, however, I imagine waking up with the smell of pacific pine trees, a warm southern summer breeze, or the crowing of a rooster on a mid-western ranch. I believe in my soul I yearn for world understanding, cultural exchange, and knowledge beyond my years. Yet I feel as though my heart lies in America, and I am proud to say so. I still don't know where I will end up as my college career scarily speeds to its end. Nor do I even know if what I wrote here will be as true as it is five months from now. But I do know that self discovery is not accomplished over night, in a few years, or even in a life time. Time, in this case, will be both my enemy and friend. But I find comfort in knowing that I will not be alone in this lovely journey.

[a-lovely-journey]

19 You + Me

It was our first week at Myrtle Beach, where it all began.

[a-lovely-journey]

Destination #1: Scotland

Off to the land of bagpipes, haggis, and William Wallace in 2 weeks!