Chips, The Photo, & The Baby Bat
Adam is struggling to get their stolen car fixed and started...and Jonah's being kind of a dick. It doesn't take long at all for the bickering to turn into silliness.
This fanfic was suggested by @yallmakemyassitch! Sorry it's so late...but regardless, I hope you enjoy!
Jonah was standing outside the car, eating a bag of chips while Adam was trying to fix the car engine. He had been working on it for about 30 minutes by this point. Jonah was just watching from a few feet away, while Adam was directly in front of the Ford Fusion with the hood open.
Adam held out his hand. “Chips please?” He asked.
Jonah narrowed his eyes and brought the chips closer to himself. “What?! No!” He reacted.
“Come on, man!” Adam reacted.
“I’m not letting you finger up the chips. Your hands are covered in grease!” Jonah argued.
Adam rolled his eyes. “Fine…then put a few chips in my hand.” He told him, cupping his left hand.
Jonah raised an eyebrow. “...Dude…What did I just say?”
Adam shot him a glare. “Just give me some fucking chips!” Adam ordered.
“Dude, you need to cool it.” Jonah told him. “Did you figure out what’s wrong with the car?” He asked.
“No.” Adam responded.
Jonah hummed and kept the chips to himself.
Adam tried to go back to fixing the engine. But nothing visibly appeared to be wrong. He just kept moving things in the engine to fix it, before trying to turn it on…but ultimately, nothing seemed to help start it. The more frustrated that Adam had become, the more agitated he became, which made him rammy and growly. He would slam the door every time the car wouldn't start…and he would keep spitting profanities under his breath.
But the straw that broke his back…was the moment he heard a camera shutter. Adam immediately knew where that camera shutter came from…
It was Jonah…with the goddamn camera.
“JONAH-!” Adam turned right around and tried to steal the camera out of his friend’s hands. “GIMME THE CAMERA.” He ordered.
Jonah yelped and tried to run away as best he could. “Adam, stop!” Jonah tried to keep the camera out of his reach. But Adam was determined to crawl onto Jonah if that was what it took to steal the camera from him.
“Okay, that’s it!” Jonah put the camera down on the upper roof of the car, and brought Adam into his arms. “You need to cool off.” He told him.
“I DO NOT!” He shouted.
“Don’t make me resort to desperate measures.” Jonah warned, smirking slightly.
Adam grunted. “And do what?” He asked, sounding slightly smug. “You can’t do anything to me.” He told him.
“I will do it-” Jonah warned with a chuckle.
“Do what?” Adam asked, not even letting Jonah finish his sentence.
“Tickle you.” Jonah replied, wiggling his fingers in his face.
Adam moved his head back slightly as he widened his eyes, visibly going white. “...You wouldn’t…” He muttered.
“Oh, I would. And I will…unless you calm down.” He replied.
Adam narrowed his eyes slightly. “I’ll only calm down if you delete that picture you just took of me.” Adam told him. “Wrong answer, bud.” Jonah replied with a chuckle as he lowered his hand down to his belly and began fluttering his fingers.
“Don’t-DOHON’T!” Adam’s wiggles started almost instantaneously. “I’LLFUCKING KIHIHILL YOU!” He shouted at him.
“Damn…wrong move.” Jonah said, sounding slightly disappointed. Adam tried his absolute hardest to wiggle himself out of Jonah’s grip. But it was surprisingly difficult. Jonah may not have been the strongest guy out there…but he certainly knew how to hold a person hostage. “WhenIgetout-eEEK!” His wiggles paused for a few moments as he looked forward, frozen in shock.
Jonah had paused his tickle attack to burst out laughing. “Holy shit, dude!” He reacted.
“Shut up!” Adam spat.
“Can I call you baby bat?” Jonah asked a little too casually.
“Do NOT call me baby bat!” Adam yelled.
“Nah, it’s funny!” Jonah replied.
“When I get out, I’m gonna fucking destroy you.” Adam warned in a threatening way.
Jonah clicked his tongue and shook his head as he switched to scratching his belly with all 5 of his fingers. “Wrong move yet again, pal.” Jonah replied, growing a smirk.
“JONAH-” Adam threw his head back and let out a rather large wheeze. When he breathed in, he let out the biggest hysterical laugh Jonah had ever heard from him. “HOHOLY SHIHIHIHIT!” Adam shouted mid-laugh.
Jonah couldn’t stop his own laughter from leaving his mouth. “Jehehesus! I don’t remember you being this ticklish!” Jonah reacted.
“SHUHUHUHUT UHUHUP!” Adam shouted back. “QUIHIHIT TICKLING MEHEHEHE!” Adam attempted to order.
“Nah.” Jonah replied casually. “I’m having fun.” He told him.
“IHIHI’M NOHOHOT!” Adam argued.
“Awww, you’re not having fun yet?” Jonah asked.
“NOHOHOHO!” He shouted back.
“I’m not gonna stop until you’re having fun.” Jonah told him.
“FUCK YOHOHOHOU!” Adam spat back.
“The wrong moves just never end with you, do they?” Jonah told him. Though disappointment was clearly dripping from his lips, he was still smirking rather evilly. This was just proof that he wasn’t actually disappointed in Adam. Not in the slightest.
Adam lessened his protests a little bit, just resorting to only laughing his head off. “HAHAHAHAHA! AAAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHEHEHE!” He kept laughing.
“Just let me know when you’re having fun like me, okay?” Jonah told him.
“HOHOHOW IHIHIS THIHIS FUHUHUHUN?!” He yelled.
“I’m glad you asked!” Jonah replied, sounding absolutely ready to infodump straight into Adam’s poor ears. “It’s fun for me because I get to hear you laugh and squeak like the baby bat you are…” He started off.
“NOHOHOHOHOOOO!” Adam whined.
“And it’s fun for you because you’re laughing!” Jonah told him. “Laughter is supposed to make you feel good. Did you know that even fake laughter makes you feel good?” Jonah asked him.
“BUHUHULLSHIHIHIT!” Adam shouted at him yet again. “It’s true!” Jonah told him. “I read it in a book somewhere.” He told him. “I don’t remember what book, but I know it was about anatomy.” He admitted.
“PLEHEHEHEASE STOHOHOP!” Adam ordered.
“Nope. Not until I know you’re having fun.” Jonah replied.
Adam could feel himself getting weaker by the second. He felt as his knees had begun to buckle, making him slightly fearful. “IHIHI’M GOHONNA FAAHAHAHALL!” He shouted.
“Don’t worry, I gotcha.” Jonah told him, wrapping his hands under his arms and helping him down.
But even when Jonah had tried to help, his hands getting even slightly close to his armpits was enough to make him squeal. “NOHOHODON’T!” Adam yelled.
“Don’t what?” Jonah asked for clarification. “”NOHO- NOAHARMPITS!” Adam yelled.
“Good lord, I’m gonna be deaf by the time you start having fun.” Jonah admitted with a laugh, removing his right hand out from under his arms, to adjust his ears. “Speaking of which…” Jonah tickled all over his upper ribs as he brought his mouth closer to Adam’s ear. “Are you having fun yet?” He asked.
“IHIHIHIHI-” Adam squeaked like the baby bat he was, and finally hung his head. “YEHEHES, FIHINE! IHIHI’M HAVING FUHUHUN!” He told him.
“Prooomise?” Jonah teased.
“YESYESYEHEHES! JUHUSTPLEASE SSSSTOP!” Adam pleaded.
“Will do.” Jonah replied, stopping his fingers and letting Adam fall onto the cold pavement.
“Gohod…*huff* *huff* Gohohod dahahammihit…” Adam muttered, curling up into a ball.
Jonah smirked and knelt down beside him. “I didn’t kill you, did I?” he asked.
Adam huffed and crossed his arms. “.....No…” He muttered.
“Okay, good. The baby bat isn’t completely tickled out.” Jonah replied, patting Adam’s head.
Adam grunted and waved his hands around, trying to get Jonah’s hand away from his head. “Dude!” He reacted.
“Hey, don’t touch me. Your hands are still greasy.” He told him.
Adam scoffed. “So you can tickle me to tears, but I can’t even wave my hands near you?” He asked, clearly annoyed.
“I didn’t say that…” Jonah muttered.
“Sure…” Adam rolled his eyes.
“Do I need to tickle you again?” Jonah asked.
“NO!” Adam yelled in an abnormally high voice. “Cause if you keep acting like a dick, I may tickle you again.” Jonah warned with a little smirk on his face.
“You’d better not!” Adam warned. “Then you’d better not piss me off.” Jonah replied with plenty of confidence to match.
Adam huffed and got himself up onto his feet. He muttered something under his breath as he dusted off his hands.
“I’m sorry, what was that?” Jonah asked, lifting his hands up to wiggle them rather evilly.
“N-Nothing.” Adam replied.
Jonah hummed and lowered his hands. “Okay.”
Adam’s attitude seemed to calm down slightly. He watched as Jonah reached up and grabbed the camera from the top of the car. This action sparked a newfound agitation in him. The thought of his own picture being taken by Jonah without his permission, still stuck deeply inside his head. In a moment’s notice, Adam had quickly become determined to take the camera back from Jonah. But he would have to start off by asking.
“Can I have the camera?” Adam asked.
“Nope.” Jonah replied casually.
Adam frowned. Not a great start. “I wanna see the picture you took of me.” Adam admitted.
“You really don’t. It’s kinda crappy.” Jonah admitted. “Besides: I don’t want your greasy hands breaking the camera.” Jonah told him.
“Keep mentioning my greasy hands, and I may get you back.” Adam warned, his irritation taking over again.
“No touch-backs.” Jonah declared with a chuckle.
Adam rolled his eyes and ran up to him. He wrapped his arms around his sides and began digging. “You think that’s stopped me before?” Adam teased, a smirk growing on his face.
Jonah gasped and widened his eyes. “ADAM- I’M WEARING WHITE!” Jonah shouted.
“Please…You’ve got more important things to worry about…like the crazy ticklish revenge I’m about to give you.” Adam replied in a villainous tone.
It was almost criminal how quickly Adam was able to change from sheepish when threatened, to becoming the threat himself. Though…according to those wanted signs all over Mandela County, they are already kinda criminals by this point in time…
“GET YOUR HANDS OHOHOFF-” Jonah immediately doubled over and fell to the pavement.
“Wow…And you said I was the ticklish one…” Adam teased.
“Sh-Shut up.” Jonah muttered.
“What?” Adam asked as he reached for the camera.
“NO-”
“Not having fun yet?” Adam asked next like the cheeky little shit he was.
“Iswearto-FAHAHAHAHAHA!” Jonah threw his head back and struggled to get his hands away. “GAHAHAHAHA! EEEEHEEHEHEE!” He squealed.
“You swear to ‘Faaa’? The hell’s that supposed to mean?!” Adam reacted.
“SHHHUHUSH! SHUHUT IHIHIHIHIT!” Jonah shouted.
“But seriously! What’s a ‘faaaa’?!” Adam asked.
“THIHIS IS SOHOHOHO CRUHUHUHUEL!” He yelled back at him.
“You started it!” Adam reacted like a petty child. “I’ll stop if you let go of the camera.” Adam told him.
“NOHOHO! NO-NO-NOHOHOHOHO- Neheheveheheherrrr!” Jonah yelled.
“Don’t make me tickle your armpit.” Adam warned with a half-sly, half-genuine smile on his face.
“No! NOHOHOO! DOHOHON’T YOHOU DAHAHAHARE!” Jonah practically screamed at him.
“IIIII’m gonna do it~! Iiii’m gonna go for it!” Adam said with a villainous voice, making sure to wiggle his fingers dangerously close to Jonah’s left armpit.
“SHIHIT-SHITSHIT-!” Jonah kept cursing and protesting.
“Aaaaand…” He poked his armpit. “Boop!”
Jonah shrieked and spazzed like a little kid, letting go of the camera in the process. Adam took the camera in his hand carefully but swiftly, and looked at the photo. It looked to just be a picture of Adam working on the car with a description underneath. It read:
[adam trying to fix the car while i eat chips LMAO -jonah]
Adam chuckled. “This was what you were keeping from me?” Adam asked, turning to show Jonah the picture he had taken beforehand. “This is barely newsworthy.” Adam let him know.
“But it kinda sucks.” Jonah muttered.
“Better than I could’ve done.” Adam replied.
“Bullshit.” Jonah scoffed.
Adam sighed softly as he turned off the camera. “No one’s expecting perfection from you, dude.” Adam told him. “If it makes you feel any better, it’s unlikely anyone will find it anyway.” He mentioned before offering him a hand up.
Jonah shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah…I guess you’re right.” He replied, taking Adam’s hand and getting up with his partner-in-crime’s help.
“Come on.” Adam grunted, pulling Jonah up before giving him the camera back. “We got a car to steal.”
Jonah chuckled and put the camera into his pocket.