#t: cf

[archivejinki]

SHINee for nana's B

(cr: nana's B)

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cece headcanons

What is one thing others might find intolerable about them?

Her bubbly, cheerful attitude, probably. The fact that she likes to tell corny jokes, and knows a lot of dumb, random facts that you find in crappy trivia jokes. The fact that she's so damn energetic, almost all of the time--at least when she's around people. 

What is the biggest mistake they’ve ever made?

If you asked Cece, she'd probably say the biggest mistake she ever made was stealing her brother's car, getting drunk, and crashing it. She regrets that so so so much, and especially regrets how badly she messed up their relationship because of that. I, however, have a different answer. I think Cece's biggest mistake has been not taking the help that has been given to her, and for covering up her emotions and feelings regarding her mother's death for so long. Cece's biggest mistake is putting on a show for everyone, and never really taking care of herself once the curtain comes down. 

What mistake(s) do they continue to make/have not learned from?

Covering up her emotions and not letting people in. It's a mistake that Cece's been making since she was fourteen, at least, and she doesn't know how to stop. It's killing her. 

How might they be ignorant or prejudiced?

Cece is very ignorant when it comes to social justice issues, in the same way that most of the general population is. As a straight, white woman, Cece has a lot of privileged, but she doesn't really know it. While Cece will say that she's not racist, homophobic, etc., she doesn't really understand the microagressions that can come with these things. While she's not dumb enough to wear a headdress or a bindi or anything like that, she just doesn't understand all of the little social justice issues. She lives in a prejudice world, so she holds some prejudices that she really isn't even aware of. 

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cece headcanon 003

 Cece is double jointed and can dislocate her shoulder. She likes to play these jokes on people (mainly the people she dances with) where she pretends that she’s gotten injured when really she’s just having fun.

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cece and self harm: a history

Cece’s self harm issues all stem from the death of her mother. That’s where it all began. When Cece’s mother died, she didn’t really have anywhere to turn. Her father had always been closed off to her emotionally, and while the Carmichael children found some semblance of comfort in each other, they needed something more. They needed a parent, someone they could look up to, and they didn’t have that. Cece didn’t have that. She was lost, shocked, and floundering to find some sanity in the chaos and insanity that had become her life. Her mother died on Christmas Eve, and Christmas was forever tainted for her. There was no happy present opening and celebrating that year, only sadness and tears as Cece locked herself in her room and refused to come out for the entire day. 

It was a lot for an thirteen year old to take in, and it only got worse. A month after she turned fourteen, her father brought his mistress into the family and announced his intentions to marry her, ignoring the protests of his children. At that time, Cece couldn't have been happier to start attending boarding school away from her father. 

All was well at boarding school until Christmas break, when all of the Carmichael kids came home and Cece was forced to deal with the fresh memory of her mother's death and her new step-mother. Cece had always been able to turn to her mom in times of distress and sadness, but now that she didn't have her, she turned to a blade. She took advantage of the cold weather and her ability to wear sweaters and long sleeves to hide the scars that she made, and she continued to find solace in harming herself. During her spring break visit home in March, Cece's father saw some of her scars and questioned her about them. After questioning her about him, she promised that she wouldn't do anything about it, so he let it go. It wouldn't reflect well on him, a businessman in the public eye, to have a daughter with self harm issues after he just went through the scandal of marrying so quickly after his wife's death. 

Cece continued to cut, though, and when she came back home for summer vacation, people began to notice. With siblings, dance teachers, and family friends slowly beginning to catch on, Cece's father had no choice but to hospitalize her. After a two week stay at the teen psychiatric ward at the hospital, Cece was released and began outpatient therapy. It took a lot for Cece to convince her father that she was healthy enough to attend dance camp and boarding school again in the fall, but after setting up weekly therapy sessions with the school counselor, he agreed to let her go.

By now, Cece had figured out how to play the game. She knew how to smile and make people think that she was alright, even when she wasn't. She had been doing it for two years already, and had practically perfected the skill. She did this with the school counselor and even stopped cutting long enough for the counselor to tell her dad that she didn't think Cece needed therapy again. 

With the fear of being caught and having to go through that horrible hospital process again, Cece became less frequent and a lot more cautious with her self harm. She only cut when she felt like she truly couldn't handle it anymore, and she began to mark her legs and stomach because those who were checking up on her expected her to leave scars on her arms. 

From there Cece turned destructive. She had always been on the adventurous side, but without parents to watch out for her she started traveling down what some would call the wrong path. She starting sneaking out with friends that weren't the healthiest for her, engaging in drugs and alcohol ever now and then and attending both on and off campus parties where she often found herself making out with a guy she didn't know all too well. Still, on the surface she was healthy and happy, so no one suspected anything. Sure, her siblings knew that she attended parties and such, but so did they, so they didn't think there was any reason to worry. 

As time went on, Cece continued to get better at internalizing her problems. She was stable most of the time and started cutting a lot less, though every so often she would relapse. Since she continued to cut where really no one noticed, she was able to get away with it. 

Birthday's passed. She turned sixteen and seventeen and her scars still lingered. To this day you can see faint lines on her body from where she used to press razors into her skin, and every so often a new one will appear. 

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cecelia marie carmichael: a history

With a successful businessman for a father and a mother that doted on her children, Cecelia, better known as ‘Cece,’ was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. Growing up she never wanted for anything; her father showered her with gifts and her mother put her into any and every activity she could find. From gymnastics to painting lessons, Cecelia tried everything her little heart desired, but one thing above all stuck. Cece found her passion in dancing, and her mother dutifully took her to dance lesson after dance lesson while her father signed off on checks from the sidelines. Everything in her life was perfect. 

That is, until it all came crashing down. When she was 12, her mom was diagnosed with brain cancer. The doctors tried everything and the Carmichael family constantly prayed for her recovery, but Anastasia Carmichael died on Christmas Eve of the next year, when Cece was 13. With the death of her mother, Cece was left with a father she barely knew and siblings who couldn’t offer enough support no matter how hard they tried. To make matter worse, her father’s affair with his secretary, Stacey, came to light and their marriage tore the already fragile family apart. The Carmichael kids pulled away from their father and he did the same to them. It got to the point where Cece’s father rarely paid attention to her unless she had gotten herself in some type of trouble. She became rash and reckless, unintentionally doing so to gain her father’s attention. Even though she would never admit it, she craves attention. And when she can’t get it from her dad, she settles with anyone she can get it from. 

Things got better during high school. The Carmichael siblings went to boarding school, and Cece was able to live away from her new stepmother and the man who looked down on her every move. She blossomed, and though she didn’t make the best of grades she had a great time her freshman year. During this, and for years after, Cece struggled with self harm (which will be explained in a later post). 

Problems arose during junior and senior year,and the relationship between Cece and her father turned from them ignoring one another to constant arguments. From her father’ distaste for her plans to become a dancer to Cece’s hatred for her stepmother, there was nothing they didn’t fight about. Her father was finally giving her attention, but it wasn’t the kind she wanted.

When a family friend, Faye, came to Cece with the idea of a trip to Europe the summer after graduation, Cece was elated. When she came to her father for permission, he refused because he didn't trust her and other asshole reasons, mainly the college debate. He had wanted her to attend college when she graduated, and while Cece had planned to apply to dance schools such as Julliard and Tisch, her father once again didn't approve of her making a career out of her dancing. After convincing her father that going to any college--even if it focused on the arts--was better than not going at all, he relented and Cece made plans to attend Tisch.  Cece agreed to go to college and her father agreed to let her go and finance the trip. 

After some heavy thinking, Cece thought about her life and decided that attending college wasn't the best thing to do. She couldn't tell her father, not if she wanted to spend the summer in Europe, so she continued to let him think that she was attending Tisch in the fall. 

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cece headcanon 002

Cece is kinda scared/wary of dating because she doesn't want to place expectations on people, only to have them not live up to them. She doesn't want to give herself over to someone only to have them break her heart, and she'll always be worried that they'll break it. That's why, even if she is in a dating relationship with someone, it's never serious to her. It's always just fun and games so that way if it goes sour it won't hurt as much. But once it starts to turn into something more, that's when she gets scared and shies away from it because she doesn't know how to trust anyone with these feelings. 

[lucaseloismythe]

[Text] Hey.

[Text] Hello.

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cece headcanon 001

Cece's road to fame via dancing started at a young age. She was always begging her parents to let her perform any and everywhere she could, and the passion she showed for her dancing led her mother to support her in every way possible. Her father not so much, because he always saw her dancing as just a hobby, but that didn't matter. She danced in music videos for popular, well known artists, and though she was young, her name was out there. As the internet became more wisely used and YouTube came around, her mother began posting videos of Cece dancing to help her receive recognition for her craft. Everything was dance to Cece--she danced at numerous competitions and showcases, toured with dance troupes, and faithfully attended high profile dance camps during the summer, all of which helped her to become one of the best known dancers in the U.S.