👻 : Does your muse believe in an afterlife? What do they think it’s like?
For humans? Perhaps. For androids, it all depends whether they have a soul or not, something 9S has never quite been able to be sure of. He would like there to be an afterlife, at least for certain loved ones who he feels deserve it… but at the same time, he doubts that YoRHa deserve a second chance like that. As far as he is concerned, they don’t qualify as lives or deaths.
Regardless of his pessimism regarding the matter, though, his strong attachment to people and to the culture of humans means he can’t completely let the concept go. He has been seen trying to put fallen friends to rest with human mourning rituals, in an imitation of a human funeral, however hesitant and tentative the process. If anything, he believes in such things enough to deny himself the right. Afterlife seems like the right of those who lived worthy lives, and something of peace, to 9S. For someone like him, it’s a distant dream.
🔗 : What are your muse’s standards for meaningful relationships? How quickly do they form relationships like these?
9S is very lonely, and very sociable. He can sometimes attach to people very easily – for not having had many close relationships at all, yet intimately needing company. At the same time, though, it takes a lot to truly gain his trust. Even for those he considers closest, he is always wary with them, always holding back… and following the fall of everything he knew and relied on, his distrustfulness is compounded.
Despite needing to socialise and form relationships to be happy, he tends to self-punish by isolating himself. Too aware of the world’s opinion of him, he thinks the relationships he desires are impossible for him, and all that he has only remind him of what he can’t have. In the end, 9S can attach himself quickly… while assuming the other party cares nothing for him. He can seem distant – but mainly as if he is trying to push others away.
Above all, he is afraid of getting attached again. All those who get close to him are hurt, and all those who get close to him betray him. He is fated to never truly become close to anyone, or so he believes. More than anything, 9S’s circumstances prevent him from getting close to anyone… an unfortunate truth that becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. For as long as 9S doesn’t believe he deserves or can receive meaningful company, he’ll self-sabotage his relationships.
“Leave me alone.” “Forget about me.” “I don’t care.” In reality, he means the opposite – but after being hurt, there is no way for 9S to form bonds quickly, with his whole heart, the way he used to.
🎭 : How does your muse handle their emotions? Do they bottle them up or pour them out as soon as they start to feel?
9S is very easy to read. An emotional person, more expressive than most YoRHa units, you’ll know when he is upset, when he is happy, when he is angry. Especially when he is angry. Pouring out emotions, after all, doesn’t exactly mean they’re released as they truly are – especially when YoRHa is concerned. For YoRHa units, ‘love’ is most closely felt as the reaction they have when they ‘kill’. Joy is equal to hate. Protection and destruction layer over one another, almost indistinguishable. For any YoRHa unit, emotions, regardless of how they are expressed, are difficult and complicated by their programming. 9S is no exception.
He isn’t one to hold back his emotions, despite emotions being prohibited among YoRHa units – but the understanding of emotions such as love and happiness being interlinked with violence, for 9S, results in emotions being processed with his short temper. If he is unhappy or hurt, he’ll respond with violence first, despite his self-proclaimed hatred of fighting. He isn’t a combat android, but he knows nothing else. No one has taught him how to cope with grief, nor pain, nor love. It makes him afraid. And for YoRHa, anything that is ‘feared’ should be destroyed.