ooga booga sketch. i’m sorry for doing fluctra and bright so dirty bc i simply desired to add some balance but that also failed so darn
[Photo ID: A simple grayscale sketch of characters from the Balls SMP on a pale gray background. In the bottom center, surrounded by flames, is Electra. She is looking down and crying. Behind her are the words in black, “MONEY > MORALITY.” Above her to her left is Isa, who has a distraught expression. To Isa’s right is Taffie, who stares down with a pensive expression. Above them is Poiya who stares towards the viewer. A flag waves behind her. In the background to the respective left and right sides are Bright and Fluctra. Scattered around the art are a ribbon and a masquerade ball mask. /End ID]
Relationships: Fluctra & drewtunes, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, drewtunes & Taffietv, drewtunes & Erin | ItsElectra, Erin | ItsElectra/Taffietv, its very minor but we are sticking with canon so its there
Characters: drewtunes, Fluctra, Other Character Tags to Be Added, Taffietv, Erin | ItsElectra,
Additional Tags: Canon Compliant, Fluff, No Plot/Plotless, Not RPF, Humor, Pov Multiple
Drew made grabby hands with his free hand toward Taffie. Taffie reluctantly allowed Drew to take his hand, placing it palm up. Drew pulled something out of his pocket and placed it in Taffie’s open hand.
It was a fish.
A very real, very wet fish.
Taffie just blinked in confusion at this strange gift. His brain just shut off. The only thing he could say was, “Why?”
“‘Cause you a cat.” Drew stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Cats like fish.”
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Taffie’s feet made a soft thump noise as the teleporter deposited him on the roof of the sanctuary. He made his way inside, letting out a deep breath when he reached the inner room. He’d made this journey many times and yet it never stopped being stressful. It didn’t help that he had just gotten out of a rough meeting with the heads of GMC. He really hated those meetings. So much pressure on him as the founder to make all the right decisions. It was better when Poiya was still here but well he couldn’t dwell on that. He had paperwork to do. Taffie actually didn’t hate paperwork that much. Sure, reading all the legal jargon and doing math in his head wasn’t fun but it was better than meetings. Much quieter work.
Taffie settled down against a wall in the sanctuary, bemoaning the lack of comfy chairs. Erin really should have gotten more comfier furniture for their home, er, temporary home. Wait, he was the one who encouraged them to not leave the sanctuary. Ok, that was his bad, but he’s not going to tell them that. He’ll just bring some comfy chairs with him next time he makes the trip here. Safety wasn’t worth it if you couldn’t have nice seating.
Taffie pulled out the first stack of paper and prepared to lose himself in a mess of words and numbers. Ugh, taxes. He sighed. Welp, the sooner he finishes the sooner he can actually relax in his own home.
Some movement caught his eye. Erin’s kid was toddling around the room. Taffie narrowed his eyes. That means that Erin probably isn’t here, Drew’s always hanging around his mom when she’s at the sanctuary. That's good, it would be hard to focus with her here but also bad because sooner or later that kid’s going to come over here and distract him. Maybe if he stays quiet the child won’t see him? Taffie sits as still as he can and just watches Drew do whatever it is kids do. The little kid wobbled over to a chest, hefted open the lid, and pulled out a box of juice. Taffie squinted at the table on the box. Tomato juice? He knew Erin’s parenting style was a bit odd but what parent would let their kid drink tomato juice? Wait actually there’s a high chance that Yahi had been the one to introduce Drew to tomato juice. That chaotic masked man was addicted to ketchup and tomato juice was just ketchup light. Ok criticism of Erin’s parenting style retracted. No one could stop Yahi from committing chaos, not even a former assassin like Erin.
It didn’t seem like Drew was going to bug him, at least not yet, so Taffie went back to his work, ignoring the sounds of Drew drinking his juice. Ah, great, it seems like Ruepa’s trying to dodge taxes again. Seriously, the man thinks that just because he’s a journalist means that he’s immune from paying his taxes. Well, he’s not. If Taffie had his way then Ruepa wouldn’t be in GMC at all, but kicking him out would just mean bad press for Taffie. Hopefully he and Erin can put their plan into motion soon. He really wanted that nosy fucker gone.
Taffie let himself get lost in his work, mindlessly crunching numbers and internally grumbling about the other residents of GMC. He’d never say any of that out loud— that would ruin his image— but it was safe to just think it. Sue him, he had a really bad day. Meetings ran long and Fluctra accused him again of “Conspiring with Erin'' which yes, he was doing that but still she didn’t need to yell at him. Taffie’s ears flattened at the memory but perked up again when he heard a squelching noise coming towards him.
Ah, it seems like Drew was walking towards him again but now soaking wet. Lovely.
Drew walked right up to Taffie and plopped down next to him. Taffie tried to ignore him but ignoring babies is kind of impossible, they just won’t let you. The 2 year old gave Taffie’s tail a weak tug. Taffie pulled it out of his damp fingers and looked down at him.
“What?” Taffie tried to keep his tone level but his annoyance from all of the day’s bullshit seeped into his words. The toddler didn’t flinch at his harsher tone but instead reached into his pocket. Oh no, this kid had a gift for him. On one hand, gifts are always fun and it was a bit heartwarming that Drew had gotten him one. On the other hand, he really doubted that a 2 year old was the best at picking out a gift.
Drew made grabby hands with his free hand toward Taffie. Taffie reluctantly allowed Drew to take his hand, placing it palm up. Drew pulled something out of his pocket and placed it in Taffie’s open hand.
It was a fish.
A very real, very wet fish.
Taffie just blinked in confusion at this strange gift. His brain just shut off. The only thing he could say was, “Why?”
“‘Cause you a cat.” Drew stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Cats like fish.”
“I’m… not a cat.” Taffie’s brain was slowly rebooting. “Why did you think I was a cat?”
Drew pointed up at Taffie’s pink ears. “Cat ears.”
“Drew, I’m a wolf. These are wolf ears.” Taffie told the child. Drew tilted his head in confusion. Taffie would have facepalmed if he wasn’t holding important documents in one hand and a real fish in the other. Why did so many people think he was a cat? He is very clearly a wolf.
Just when Taffie was about to take the time out of his day to explain to Drew the difference between a catperson and a wolfperson he felt a twitch in his hand. He looked down just in time to see the fish twitch.
Taffie shrieked and dropped the fish, scrambling away. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad! He furiously wiped his hand off on his pants, walking backwards away from the still twitching fish. Drew just stared at him before picking up the fish and putting it back in his pocket.
“Drew, where did you get a live fish from?” Taffie gasped out, his heart finally beginning to calm. He didn’t know why a live fish was so much worse than a dead one, it just was ok? Don’t question him. In lieu of an answer Drew just pointed out the window. Right, the indoor lake had fish in it.
Wait.
“You climbed the ladder with a live fish in your pocket?” Taffie asked incredulously. The pond was a whole floor lower! There’s only a ladder leading up or down! There’s not even safety rails! Taffie was really being reminded of how not toddler friendly the sanctuary was. If it wasn’t for the fact that this kid was functionally immortal Taffie was sure that he would have been permadead within the first week of living here.
Drew shook his head rapidly, dark hair falling into his face and exposing tiny horns that Taffie knew would grow to be just like Erin’s. The kid took a step forward and then just went up. How in the world? The fucking toddler can fly now? Or well, float, Taffie guesses. He doesn’t seem to have very good control, with how he smacked his head into the ceiling.
“Ok, the child of a literal god and a half-demon via immaculate conception has weird powers. I really should have seen this coming.” Taffie muttered to himself as Drew slowly floated back down to the floor. “Well, now that we know how you got the fish, we should really put it back. It was a very thoughtful gift, but seeing as I’m not a cat and that fish is very much still alive, we should release it back to its home. That sound good, Drew?” Taffie spoke with his politest business voice that he only really pulled out when he had to be nice to someone he really couldn’t anger. He didn’t think Drew would get angry, but if Taffie was mean, he might tell Erin and that would be bad. He did not want Erin being mad at him. She was scary. It was kinda hot but still, not fun. He’d lost his train of thought. What was he talking about? Right, putting the fish back.
Drew thought on Taffie’s words before nodding and beginning to walk over to the opening that led down to the pond. Before Taffie could say any words of warning, the demigod child jumped. Oh god, did Erin’s kid just die right in front of him? Taffie rushed over to the ledge just in time to hear a muffled splash and see Drew doggy-paddling over to the edge of the pond. Right, water. Thank goodness Erin had gotten this kid some swimming lessons. Taffie inhaled sharply, thankful that he didn’t just witness a child’s demise. Wait, isn't Drew immortal? Taffie felt a little bit dumb for forgetting that, but he was still kinda rattled from the fish incident.
Taffie made his way down to the grassy bottom floor of the sanctuary, taking the ladder because he is not risking that jump. He met up with Drew, who was grabbing fistfuls of sand and throwing them into the pond. Just 2 year old things, Taffie assumed.
“So, Drew, where’s the fish? Did you let it free already?” Taffie asked, stepping a bit closer to the edge of the pond. Drew pulled the still struggling fish out of his pocket and showed it to Taffie.
“Good, now just drop the fish-“ Before Taffie can finish talking, Drew yeeted the fish across the lake. Drew’s tiny toddler muscles mean that the fish doesn’t go very far and in fact lands directly in the middle of the pond before swimming away.
“Yes, I guess that’s one way to do that.” Taffie muttered. “Now that we’ve freed the fish, can we go back inside? There’s some papers I really need to finish working on.”
Drew just looked up at Taffie, already elbow deep in the lake. “No.” He stated simply.
“No? Listen, Drew, I have really important work to get done and I can’t just leave you here alone, even if you’re normally out here alone, so can we please just go back-'' Taffie was once again interrupted by Drew but instead of the kid yeeting a fish across a lake, he has instead decided to splash a wave of water into Taffie’s face. Taffie sputtered, ears pinned back and hair utterly drenched. Ok, maybe the cat comparison was accurate after all, because he really, really hated this. Taffie wiped the water droplets off his glasses in order to see the gleeful look on Drew’s face. Without thinking, Taffie sent a wave of his own straight at Drew’s face.
“Take that!” He yelled, the glee of committing an act of vengeance running through him. Before he could feel even the slightest amount of guilt at committing an act of violence against a toddler, said toddler committed another act of violence by splashing Taffie yet again. Ok, kid, it’s on.
It was war now. Taffie ducked away from Drew’s second splash, leaping up and running to shelter. He grabbed one of Drew’s stay toys as he ran, a bucket for sand, and used it to scoop water for amo. Drew grabbed his own weapon, a toy pistol that shoots water, and began floating into the air. From then on the two went all out, making sure to get each other as soaked as possible. They battled for quite a while, trading blows and making up new plans. Taffie was beginning to think that this battle would never end, but then Drew dropped out of the sky and into Taffie’s arms. The lil dude was worn out from the playtime and also from using a lot of godly magic. Taffie was also tired, and he leaned against one of the pastel trees, dropping Drew down next to him.
“Ha, I win.” Taffie says weakly. “I won a splash war against a toddler. Wow, I sound really pathetic saying that out loud.”
Drew gave him a look that very clearly said, “You are.”
“Well that was actually kind of fun. Who knew that-“ A loud crack interrupted his sentence, and Taffie whipped his head over to the source of the noise. Drew didn’t seem alarmed but Taffie was frightened. Was it one of his many enemies, come to finally assassinate him?
His eyes flashed as he scanned the room only to see the last seconds of invisibility drain away from the person, leaving Erin standing there, wings tucked behind her and a mischievous glint in her eyes.
Taffie’s shoulders relaxed, relieved that it wasn’t an enemy of his, before stiffening up again. He was by the pond having a splash fight with Drew, both of them soaked to the bone with water. Oh no, his reputation was doomed. Erin had their hand over their face and was visibly holding back laughter at his disheveled appearance.
“Having fun boys?” They asked in a teasing tone. Taffie just glared at her even when Drew stood up, shook himself to get the water out, and ran over to her, babbling like toddlers do. She cooed and hoisted him up into her arms. “Wasn’t expecting to see both of you playing around in the water when I came back, but I am not complaining.”
“This never leaves this room. Don’t say anything.” Taffie tried to be intimidating but it was ruined by the water seeping out of his hair. Erin just chuckled.
‘Who would I even tell? Don’t worry, Taffie, your secret is safe with me.” They said with a wink. Taffie willed himself not to be flustered as he sulked past them.
“I need to finish my work. Have a good night you two.” Taffie said as he turned back to them both. He tried to reign his tone back to its calm and charismatic norm but it really wasn’t working today. Erin’s expression was still mirthful, even as Drew was starting to chew on her hair.
“You could always just stay. It's getting late and I picked up some fast-food while I was out.” He knew that by picked up she meant stole. “There’s more than enough for all of us. You can always do your work later.” Erin suggested. Taffie opened his mouth to retort but honestly, he’s tired. It had already been a hectic and stressful day and he really didn’t want to do more paperwork. A hot meal with someone he actually likes talking to sounds so much better than working till he can barely stay awake, popping a frozen meal into the oven and passing out before he can even finish eating it.
“…Fine. I’ll stay for dinner. Thank you for the kind offer.” He finally said. Erin’s face lit up with a smile before she squashed it with a neutral expression. For a former assassin Erin really wasn’t the best at not letting her feelings show all over her face.
“That's great. I’ll go start dishing it out. Mind watching Drew for a moment more?” They asked. Taffie scoffed.
“Oh, absolutely not. Please, don’t leave me alone with that hellion.” He said, forgetting to not be rude. Erin outright laughed her signature cackle at that statement.
“And here I was thinking you two were getting along.” She teased. “That's fine. Drew can stay with me. You’ll have to help carry plates though. I won’t have enough hands.” Erin waved her one free hand not holding a 2 year old to make a point. Taffie nodded.
“I can do that.” He said, just happy to not have to babysit any longer. Enough was enough. Taffie relaxed as the two of them started working on dinner, exchanging familiar banter. He remembered why he liked Erin so much, she was fun and brought energy to the room that Taffie couldn’t bring himself. Without the standard tension that surrounded the two of them ever since the disbanding of the Castrators, it was actually nice being around her. Taffie felt his nerves draining away for the first time that day. He needed to visit the Sanctuary more often, even if the risk was high and a small child was there, ready to accost him at any moment. There wasn’t a more relaxing place.
My friend @/yourcringybrother‘s opinions on balls smp characters but his only interaction with them is from my fanfic
Fluctra: “this is basically me when i was a teenager but add actual Danger bc she could probably kill me. the kind of teen who i’d see on the street and would accurately insult me on something i was insecure about. Probably doesnt pay taxes”
Taffie: “apparnetly he’s a wolf who does taxes and is kind of a little bitch. like if the main character of beastars was a politically insensitive prick but ppl were working on frog boiling him into respecting human rights”
Isa: “a vAmpire???? who runs a bakery and used to be an assassin and cares very much for their friends. i love them dearly and i want them to thrive i also want to know why apparently one of their wolves Should not be pet and if its ever come up that they Owns wolves and also Taffie exists. have they argued about this? i also think they’d kill me”
Emi: “OH KY FUCKING GOD hTe hate hate i am an Emi Anti apparently some sort of monochrome person with? void? eyes? and the father of this Drew child but does Not want to take any responsibility so Erin is out here workin their ass off as a single mother like damn. Apparnetly they like fucking up people’s days as her version of harmless fun and I despise. Despise. If she wasn’t so down with scaring people and having commitment issues i bet she’d be really fun to have at a birthday party”
Erin: “apparently not fluctra i thought they were the same person but they’re different. also a half. black bird something half demon which holy shit your parents. seems like theyre doing their best but probably make a lot of mistakes on a daily basis which, valid. they feel like the iconic 20 year old experience of oh jesus christ what the fuck am i doing what do you MEAN i have to do this what does that thing do jesus christ i need a fucking break. Yeah thats really all i think; they deserve a fuckin break.“
Drew: “possibly? demon child? half demon? demi god?? child??? can apparently wield a weapon VERY well and WILL USE IT. the vine of that kid where the parent asks “what do you have???” “a knife!!” “nO—“. Seems like he’s just Vibing which is really fair. I can’t really gauge how old he is but he’s a toddler-ish. maybe younger maybe older i get the feeling that being part GOD sort of fucks that up. he gets into trouble but i think thats just a toddler thing. i would fear him. 10/10″
