it's like, a thing, you know.
but i know, inevitably, one day, i will be.
the fire dances in the sky. i wrote that because i was trying to be poetic. the fire does not really exist, and neither does the sky. we all know fire cannot dance in the sky. yet i wrote that the fire dances in the sky, because i'm trying to give myself hope, you see? maybe if the fire can dance in the sky, i can one day dance freely somewhere abandoned, somewhere long lost and forgotten and i will no longer have the weight of the world weighing me down. but i can't do that yet, so bare with me as the fire dances in the sky and i watch you from a distance, flames licking between my toes and i relish the heat.
but the fire. of course it's fire again, because the fire is all i know. pain, burning, hurt, fury, passion. that is all i know, however unlike that fire, my fire is in a cage. it cries. (tears do kill it, as water drowses flames, but i'm trying to be poetic.) the fire is in a cage and it has nowhere to go, much like a werewolf during his transformation, and of course, it scratches itself, doesn't it? my fire burns itself, as impossible as the fire dancing in the sky, but i said bare with me, for a moment, please, i don't know. how long is a moment? i hope it's really long. i don't know.
i guess i should probably get to the point, shouldn't i?
it hurts me, and maybe you know that already, but the fire wants to burn and it doesn't have anyone to burn so it burns me. that's why it hurts, fool. not because it longs to hold someone else, someone better, no, not because it's aching to touch someone else. no. i was a fool, still am. i was talking to myself. you could never be a fool, no.
i guess what i'm really trying to say is that i think i like you? i don't know. at this point, who does anymore?
so like, yeah. i know, you don't, i guess. i mean. i wish you don't? life is complicated. i just tossed myself from one relationship to another, believing that this is it before being discarded and damn, is that not enough? of course not. i had to fall for someone again, just because my heart still wants to find someone. it still believes, i suppose you could say.
so. do me a favor, if you don't mind. don't love me back. let me love you, but don't drowse my flames. let me take a rest, a breath, before i start mindlessly chasing after someone again.
