#terror verse

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𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 & 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇 @fitzjxmes  from: “I’m a nobody, really.”

The words caught Fitzjames' attention. That was a sentence the Commander has said to himself several times in his life. His upbringing wasn't easy and despite his outward personality, he was always judging himself. Sometimes it was hard, but he could always comfort others.

"Would you like to talk about something..." Then he realised. "Forgive me, but I didn't catch your name."

“Oh, right,” she stammered awkwardly, “my name is Fish, Captain. Fish Monet.” Not a name, per se, and yet, it was hers. The last memory of her mother, carried everywhere. She perhaps had another name once (surely), a proper name. But it was long forgotten. 

Fish found herself somewhat lost, aboard the Erebus. Away from the ship she had known all her life, back to a role as mate after years as quartermaster, away from the seas she knew so well. 

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@brassandblue​ . 𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐈 𝐏𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑

Fish avoided doctors like the plague. It was a bad habit for someone as dangerously reckless as her, but it was a necessary one too, learned after years spent hiding her true identity. And now that she was in the middle of this icy hell, stuck, she particularly disliked the possibility of a doctor figuring out that she had been lying. And the fact that Goodsir was a surgeon didn’t make it any better! Doctors, surgeons, the problem was the same! What if he asked her to lift up her shirt? How would she explain then, the bandages all over her torso?

And yet here she was, sitting down and nervously biting down her nails. She looked like a trapped animal more than a willing patient, but after a bad fall earlier that day, she had been forced there by some of the other mates.

“I’m sure it’s nothin’ sir,” she still muttered in the hope that it would speed up this whole process, “doesn’t even hurt that much.” A bold lie, but she’d rather be in pain than discovered!

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𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐊𝐘 & 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇: @brassandblue​ from:  " nodding off... "

"Look alive, Mr. Monet!" Thomas barked sharply at the young sailor who appeared to be nodding off; though his eyes glitered mirthfully and he was barely holding back a grin.

Thing was, Fish (as Thomas heard the young lad be called) wasn't actually on duty, and the old Icemaster knew it. But rather than simply play a little bit of a joke, the intention was to help the men stay aware of their environs at all times. It was a lifesaving habit, that. He wanted these boys--his boys--to stay alive and well, and it helped if they didn’t make a habit of snoozing anywhere but their hammocks.

Fish jolted wide awake, embarrassed that she had even fallen asleep in the first place. She had developed the strange ability to sleep everywhere, while simultaneously waking up at the slightest sound. A habit born out of survival, really. But Blanky’s bark was far from subtle, and she had been startled out of her slumber. 

“Oh, erhm-... ’Am real sorry, Mr. Blanky. Don’t know what got into me.” But of course, she knew. She had been having many sleepless nights! No nightmares, but a dread that clung to her stomach. Brushing over her eyes with the back of her hand, she tried to regain some semblance of composure. “Won’t happen again.”

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@thenightmareofyourdrems​​ sent: “ are you okay? “ ~ Olek (bio) for your new verse bc <333 from: 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐎𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.

Oh, she was not okay. The impetuous waves had turned into an icy hell. An implacably frozen prison, barely moving as the hull tried to force its way through it. She missed the warm seas, she missed the fresh ocean breeze, she missed running bare foot on the deck. But her old ship was far now, which she knew was good considering the circumstances. After all, she was running away from it. Still, she felt claustrophobic out here, in this white immensity of snow and ice. Stuck on a boat that wouldn’t move.

“I’m alright,” she finally lied, giving Olek a sorry excuse for a smile, “but I guess I miss the Sun. And the waves. Real waves ya’ know, not this nightmare of ice.” A long, dramatic sigh left her lips. “How are you faring, Olek?”

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@brassandblue​ sent: “The world used to be a bigger place.” / Arthur @ Fish, Terror AU from: 𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐁𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐍 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒

Hidden away from the cold in the hull of the ship, Fish was sitting on the floor. Laying on the floor, actually. It helped with the pain on her back (a stupid fall on the ice, she didn’t want to talk about it). When Arthur spoke, she looked away from the ceiling to find his silhouette standing not too far from her.

“You talk as if you were here when the world was bigger,” she mused mindlessly, smiling at the thought.

“The world used to be so small for me, before. All I knew was the port, the brothel, the dirty streets. Now... I’ve seen so much of it. And here? Feels like the goddamn end of the world.”

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𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 & 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇 @fitzjxmes from: ‘sorry, i’m just a little nervous.’

'Don't be. I think we're all feeling nervous, but we can't let it get the best of us.'

This wasn't the first time Fitzjames has abandoned a ship and it hopefully wouldn't be the last.

Hm. Walking on the ocean, frozen or not, seemed unnatural to her. But it beat being stuck on the ship. At least now they’d be moving. 

“Yes, you’re right sir,” she nodded, shoving her hands in her pockets, “I guess I’m just used to the sea being a lot less solid.” A chuckle, as if to diffuse her own nervousness.

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𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐔𝐑 & 𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇 @brassandblue​ from: “You’re funny when you’re angry.”

"You haven't seen me angry," Arthur snapped.

"This?" he gestured vigorously at himself, "this is annoyed. Frustrated, even! And I am ever so delighted you're getting a good bloody laugh out of it. Christ!"

He turned away as he paced in the small space which they currently occupied on one of the lower decks of Terror. Tears threatened and stung Arthur's eyes, so distraught was he still following Sir John's-- his father's-- death. He continued to scowl to hide the anguish in his weary green eyes.

Fish opened her mouth and closed it. She frowned, unsure why Sir Franklin’s death was upsetting him so. Not that she was heartless, far from it. She understood the despair of their situation, and the gravity of such a loss. But this? His reaction? It puzzled her. And so, she kept to herself the quip she was about to retort.

“I’m not laughing,” she simply pointed out. Death had been a part of Fish’s life, before she was even born. Her father had died when she was still in her ma’s belly. She had seen women taken by syphilis in the brothel, and then, it took her mother too. As for a life at sea, it brought its fair share of loss. But she was still bad at grief, ironically. It made her somewhat uncomfortable, as if she preferred to move forward, afraid perhaps to stop and think of all the people she had lost. Perhaps the sorrow would drown her, like a wave crashing against the shore. 

“Sir. Franklin’s death was a terrible accident,” she said, but she didn’t exactly believe her words. It was his hubris, that had killed him, and it would perhaps kill them all. The Ocean, as it turned out, was more ruthless than ever, when it was frozen solid.

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@brassandblue​ sent: “Why are you like this?” // Arthur (England) @ Fish (Terrorverse) from: 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒

“Like what? Delightful and amazing?” grinned Fish, a cloud of vapor forming around her lips as she spoke, “I don’t know, I guess I was just born like this.”