Blood.
There was a lot of it, and none of it was his - a soft reassuring voice telling him to peel back the layers of skin on his victim... wait, no, he knew this person, but he couldn’t focus enough on his face to find out who, but the black uniform was standard issue and the voice repeating itself was familiar, comforting... he had to do this, it was what they wanted. What he wanted. The surgical knife in his hand held with steadfast purpose over the man’s arm, slowly lowering itself until it touched the skin until the muffled screams broke his concentration.
He didn’t want this, he didn’t want this, this was wrong, he didn’t want this... a sweat was breaking out as he tried to pull his hand back, but a force was trying to keep it down. The muffled screams were getting louder and despite the horrid shaking in his wrist, the knife was cutting, peeling back the now blood stained skin with such horrifying ease that it made the panic in his chest burst. Snapping his head up to face the man he was doing this too, he let out a muffled yelp only to realize---
Erebus sat in the quiet mess hall in a cold sweat, staring blankly at the food in front of him. The sleeve on his left arm had been rolled up and the small standard issue tactical knife from his pocket was open and pressing against his wrist, just hard enough for a small cut to start. The dark liquid falling down edge of the blade onto the table left a small smudge of red noticeable to anyone who cared to look.
He’d been having these dreams, these hallucinations, ever since they set food on that damn ship - everyone had been, or so it seemed. Everyone was on edge, no one wanted to talk about it, no one wanted to say what they were all thinking... they just needed to get what they needed and leave. The sooner the better...
Dropping it down into his plate in a panic, the knife clattered and filled the nearly empty room when he noticed another had entered. With a shaky breath, trying to regain normalcy, trembling fingers folded the knife back into it’s proper place at his side and he nodded for the other to join. The last thing Erebus wanted was to be alone after that, these waking nightmares were getting worse and this was the first second time he’d snapped out of it to only find he was halfway through whatever fucked up thing he was imagining.
This was the first time he’d drawn blood.
With a nervous smile and a deep breath, he pushed at his food, casually keeping his other arm under the table, waiting for the other to sit down. After a moment of silence, he finally managed to choke out a few words.
“Uh... so, how’ve you been? Err, like, how’ve things been for you since we got here?” Easy enough question with enough layers to make an onion look weak. He had to probe if he could talk about this or if he just needed to let it go. He didn’t want to feel crazy.
