Though I am bruised, face of contusions, know I'll keep moving.
You didn’t ask for this, but you’re getting it.
and uh– I’m supposed to include “this long ass piece of work is inspired by the beautiful, talented @theobligatedklutz who is so incredible and amazing“
even though it’s part of your ask. but alright.
I present the continuation of this angsty post, written by me, just now.
But the line you presented above really spoke to me with this scenario so I decided to write it.
Leslie stood in front of the kitchen sink, ferociously trying to scrub away a pesky stain left on one of her nicer plates. She grumbled to herself, it seemed like nobody ever listened to her. This would’ve been easily avoided if people could just learn to use the cheaper plates. That’s what they’re there for after all. She shuddered as she imagined her mother repeating that phrase word for word when she was a child. Is this what her life had become?
She was pulled from her thoughts as the oven shouted at her, signaling that it was warm enough to use. She swiftly put her cookies into the oven and closed the door with a smile. They should be done just in time for Cyrus to come home with his best friend. When Cyrus left this morning, he chatted enthusiastically about costume day with TJ Kippen and she couldn’t wait to hear about how it went. She knew the boys were close, and she couldn’t have been happier that Cyrus had finally made another new friend. It had seemed like forever since her son had been friends with anyone but Buffy or Andi.
As she returned to her dishes, she thought about how they had spent a lot of time together in the past few months, and whether she wanted to admit it to her son or not, she could sense something a little more going on between them, and words could not describe how happy it made her. If there’s one thing a parent wants in life, it’s for their child to be happy, and it wasn’t hard to see how happy Cyrus was around TJ. He may have not mentioned anything to her specifically, but a mother always knows. Just the thought of Cyrus’ smile whenever he was with TJ and the way his face would light up made caused her to smile. It was weird how much watching your own child be happy could in turn just momentarily remove all the negative things in your life and make you happy, even just for a moment.
She was torn from her thoughts again once she heard the front door swing shut. She checked the clock on the oven. Cyrus was home earlier than usual, and it was awfully quiet for having company.
“Hey hon, did you just get in?” She yelled through the kitchen.
“Yeah.” Came his reply, a touch of sadness littered his voice as he got closer to the kitchen.
She turned around to greet her son, expecting to see an excited smile and twinkling eyes. She froze at the sight of red-rimmed eyes and quivering lips, a chill running down her spine. The plate she had no idea she had even been holding fell from her grasp and shattered against the hardwood floors.
“I wish Bubbe Rose was still here.” Cyrus mumbled softly, poorly rubbed off grey paint stuck to the corner of his brow.
She opened her mouth wanting to say something, but even after all these years of being a professional therapist she couldn’t find the words she wanted. All these years of helping talk other people through all of these problems and she didn’t even know what to say to her own son. She just stood there helplessly as she felt tears beginning to form in the corner of her eyes. What had happened? He had been so excited about their costume, and there was definitely no mention of grey face paint. And where was TJ? There were too many questions that began to circulate through her head that she didn’t even notice that Cyrus had excused himself and ran upstairs to his room.
Taking a moment to recompose herself, she leaned against the counter, resting the palms of her hands against her temples. After a moment she swiftly snapped back into the present. This was no time for dawdling or worrying about herself, Cyrus needed her whether he wanted the help or not.
She made her way up to his room, making sure to knock before slowly opening his door. She found him curled up on his bed, facing the wall. She felt her heart sink at the sight of her son looking so miserable. It had been such a long time since she had seen him like this. Not even the passing of Bubbe Rose had made him this miserable. She quietly made her way over to his bed, sitting down on its edge. She breathed in the uncomfortable silence as she wondered what she should say, or if she should even say anything at all. Her eyes blindly darted around the room as she tried to find something that would be delicate enough to bring up without making the pain of it all worse. She finally had settled on something and opened her mouth to speak, but Cyrus beat her to it.
“I don’t get it mom.” his voice was so quiet. She wouldn’t have heard him in any other room, but the silence in there had been so apparent it was hard to think about, or notice anything else.
She had a gut feeling that TJ didn’t follow through with his end of the bargain and Cyrus had been left as just, well, ‘salt’. It would explain why Cyrus had come home alone, his face covered in grey paint. It would explain the tears as one of his best friends bailed on him and the trust wouldn’t be easy to replace. This brought up so many more questions, but she settled with the first step, comfort.
“Whatever happened Cyrus, I’m sure it happened for a good reason.” She sighed, taking a moment to place a hand on her son’s leg. “I can’t speak for him, but TJ wouldn’t abandon you for no reason. He cares about you too much to do something like that.”
She felt the bed shift as Cyrus sat up. “Wait, how do you know about that?” He asked in complete shock.
A small grin grew on her face. “I may be your mother, but I’m also a therapist Cyrus. You should know this better than anyone. I can read people, pick up on pieces of things I had nothing to do with.” She shifted her position on the bed so that she was now facing him, sitting fully on his bed, legs crossed. “You talked so passionately about the costume that it wasn’t that hard to figure out something went wrong when you came home alone, and with face paint.”
Cyrus’ gaze slowly fell to his lap, nodding slowly. “You got it.”
She reached her hand up and placed it on his shoulder, giving it a reassuring rub. “Would you like to talk about it? No pressure by any means, but it might make you feel better.”
She watched as he opened his mouth but slowly closed it before any words came out.
“It’s okay, Cyrus. I’ll be here if you ever want to talk about it. It doesn’t have to be right now. Or ever even, if that would make you feel better.”
“No, I want to talk about it. I just- where do I even start?” He paused again, opening and closing his mouth as if looking for the right words to say.
She smiled at him, giving his arm a quick squeeze, making sure he knew he could take all the time he needed.
“I just- I showed up to school and he wasn’t even in costume. Then I learned that last minute he decided to do a costume with Kira and he couldn’t even bother to warn me? It’s like my feelings don’t even matter to him. I feel like I don’t even matter to him.”
She winced as she listened to his voice breaking as he talked. This clearly had meant a lot to Cyrus and it sure must have taken a lot more from TJ to just decide last minute to do a costume with- wait a minute.
“Kira? Isn’t that the girl who nearly ruined Buffy’s basketball team?”
“That’s the one.” He said unenthusiastically.
“And TJ did a costume with her?”
“Alright mom, I get it, TJ hates me. Please don’t keep reminding me every five seconds.” He groaned.
“Cyrus Goodman. TJ does not hate you.” She began sternly with her brows furrowed.” I can’t quite explain why he chose to forfeit your costume but I promise you, that he must have had a good reasoning. I know this may not be easy but if you give him a chance and hear him out, I promise things will slowly start to get better.”
“What do you know mom? You didn’t see how happy she looked.” He rolled his eyes at her.
“I don’t care about her Cyrus, what about TJ. How did he look?”
She watched as realization washed over his face. She started smiling to herself as she assumed Cyrus started to revisit everything he had missed from his previous situation.
“He looked miserable. I don’t know if i’ve ever seen him look so sad before.”
“So now will you still tell me that TJ hates you?” She asked.
“Good. Now listen to me again Cyrus.” She took a moment to place her hands firmly on his shoulders. Their eyes met and she knew this was going to go straight into his heart. It had to. “TJ does not hate you. In fact it’s quite the opposite. I know a lot about you Cyrus, I’m your mother, I have to. Some of these are things that you don’t think I know, but I do. There are things about your friends that I know, that you are unaware of. But please, believe me when I tell you that TJ does not hate you, I promise you that much. Whenever you’re able to forgive him, just hear him out, okay?”
“Okay” he nodded, his voice barely audible.
“Good” she smiled, pulling him into a hug.
“Uh, mom?” He pulled away from her, confusion on his face. “Is something burning?
“Ah, my cookies!” She shrieked, leaping up from his bed and sprinting out of his room. Before she had fully left his room, she could hear the faintest bit of laughter escaping from her son’s lips. So as she ran down the steps she smiled to herself. She had done enough to make him feel a little bit better, and it wasn’t much, but it was a start. And hearing his laughter again, that’s all she could’ve asked for.
