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Anjanette Comer in The Loved One (1965) dir. Tony Richardson

"𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐬 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐲!" -𝐉𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐖𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐩𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐛𝐮𝐫 𝐆𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐲 Lgbtq+ stars Liberace (as a funeral director), Tab Hunter (as a cemetery tour guide), Roddy McDowall (as a ruthless Hollywood film studio executive), and Sir John Gielgud (as washed-up English artist and studio dialect coach Sir Francis Hinsley) in the MGM/Tony Richardson dark comedy The Loved One, 1965. One of the gayest films of the era in-put wise, the movie was adapted from the 1948 novel The Loved One: An Anglo-American Tragedy by the (highly problematic) bisexual British author Evelyn Waugh. Waugh wrote the novel after a trip to Hollywood when MGM expressed interest in adapting his queer 1945 novel Brideshead Revisited into a film. Having not actually read the novel beforehand, when apprised of the contents of the book and Waugh's refusal to relinquish editorial control, the studio abruptly backed out. Disillusioned by his experience in Hollywood and fascinated by what he perceived to be America's maudlin obsession with the funeral industry, The Loved One was based on the iconic Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale, the final resting place of countless movie stars. In addition to Liberace, Tab, Roddy and Sir John, other lgbtq+ contributors to the production included director Tony Richardson (who was bisexual and sadly later died from AIDS in 1991), and acclaimed gay author Christopher Isherwood (who co-wrote the screenplay). Ahead of its time in many ways with its frank, irreverent and camp approach to death and funerals, the movie was critically slammed and wasn't a box office hit, though it's been re-appraised and gained a cult following in recent years.

"love turns ordinary people into poets, philosophers, and monsters." hindi na naalis sa isip ko 'to nung narinig ko kasi ang daming memories na bigla na lang bumalik sa akin. and at that time, sabi ko sa isip ko "oo nga, 'no? love can really turn you into a monster." and this movie proves it so.

it's scary to be in a relationship with someone like Ellie, to be honest. someone who's not yet ready to settle down. someone who's still finding themselves. someone na hindi gagawing mundo niya ang partner niya. it's easy to misinterpret those qualities as signs of absence of love. tahimik ang pagmamahal ni Ellie. tahimik pero sigurado. sigurado kahit hindi man niya ipagsigawan sa mundo. that's the crux of loving/to be loved by Ellie.

when you assume you're the one who invested more in the relationship, it's natural to reminisce everything and paint yourself in every scenario as the victim. but that's exactly what kills the relationship even further. what's sad is you start to discredit your partner to justify your sadness. hindi mo lang nakuha 'yung tipo ng pag-ibig na gusto mo, you start to conclude that they didn't love you. when in reality, you're just preoccupied counting your efforts that you fail to recognize your partner's efforts as well. 'yan naman ang problema kay ni Eric. he's willing to erase everything he knows about Ellie to make room for the accusations he has to help justify his sadness.

i entered the cinema hoping that i would cry my heart out kasi makaka-relate ako sa "multo." 'yung tipong TOTGA ba. but no. what i experienced was much worse, i think. hindi ako pinaiyak nung movie pero grabe 'yung bigat na iniwan ng kwento sa akin. it's really not about taking sides. it's the reality of love. the bitter truth that when you end up with someone who doesn't understand your language, you will spend a lifetime translating your soul.

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