What is the square root of 284
The Square Root of 284 is an ancient artifact from the world of Minenherstell. It was last seen in the hands of just some guy named Stefan and has since then been classified as lost. However, doubt has come up in the last few years as leading artist Gerda HopsKlops found lead in her paints and the altogether unknown scientist Freddie found a lead to something called the 'British Museum' nearly at the same time.
The origin of the name 'Square Root' is highly debated in a pub called 'The Hanging Brick', but otherwise unanimously agreed on by everyone else. The root belongs to a plant which the uneducated may call a 'tree' but which was actually a 'motherfucking big tree' (arbor gigantea matrem-coire). It was not named, as one may think, due to it being square, although it is, but instead refers to King Regina, democratically elected president of the city Mountainberg, located in the beautiful country of Wood Wood Wood. He had used the root to defend herself in a square-off on the round square of dry egg against her brother, undemocratically elected court jester of gloom. The exact matter of the argument eluded any and all participants, onlookers, historians and wholly univolved people equally and even before the conflict began. The only reason any memory of the fight even survived was the fact that King Regina told Barbara Streisand of the incident and implored her to make sure it never reached the public. The fight had left a lasting impact, as his brother now choose to impishly act out the scene at every opportunity.
As for the artifact itself the first years after the event could not be reconstructed despite all the E-Fords that had been made. Thus the whereabouts of the root in these times are unknown and no one knows, what route it took until it was rediscovered by the church of A Village, two churches in Mountainberg, the church in Everywhere and 7 other churches I am too lazy to name at the same time. Some people claim a spontaneous break in reality rooting multiple roots of different universes together as the reason while reasonable people claim fraud. As it is, no one will ever know the real reason, not even you, dear reader.
In the end the moral of the story is obscure and only dubiously existent. Stefan had found and lost the Square Root just as you did: In the blink of an eye.
