one day i will figure out why some people's ways of talking about media turn me away from those fandoms forever and other people can actually get me to watch stuff with them or sell me on things. i think it comes down to trust? investing in any piece of media is kind of a mental risk for me, so either i have to be in a position to take that risk or i have to REALLY trust the person trying to get me into that media. and this kind of trust is, i think, very easily broken. but i can't figure out why this is so touchy...i could put it down to the autism writing brain, which will obsess over the characterization of any fics i happen to write and demand so much of my energy. or i could put it down to past experiences with people reccing stuff...some combination of both? i rarely take ship or media or character recommendations. it's really vulnerable? letting someone do that is vulnerable. idk. it feels like directly granting them some part of my brain.