#theeyesandears

[cool-and-collective]

+theeyes-andears

    Jazz knew this signal all too well, and if he didn't by now, it'd be a shame.

    //Hey, Soundwave. Never expected to see you popping up in my contacts any time soon. You got something that I need to assist you with, or is this a personal thing?// 

[rip-roaring-ruffian]

theeyes-andears started following you

thee yes and ears?

[monumentalmistakes]

the-eyes-and-ears asked you: «Lord Starscream. I am ready to depart for the mission at your earliest convenience.»

«Good. Are you in the bridge?»

Wait, that was a dumb question; Starscream was in the bridge. If Soundwave was there, he could just look around and find him.

[monumentalmistakes]

the-eyes-and-ears asked you: «Lord Starscream. The warship's system has been updated, and a thorough scan is being conducted. It should not adversely affect its function. I trust this is good news?»

«...»

Facepalms and sighs quietly.

It's not that it's bad news. It's just that it seems like every three days one of the Soundwaves has announced that he's updated the ship's systems, and Starscream is pretty certain they're just undoing each other's work over and over.

But none of the other Soundwaves are here right now so he can't tell this one to coordinate with the others, so...

«Yes, good work Soundwave. Carry on.»

«However--in the future, make sure that all updates and upgrades are cleared with the second-in-command first. At the moment he's on an extended mission in another timeline, but, when he gets back. I want to make sure that the both of you are operating on the same wavelength. So to speak.»

[monumentalmistakes]

the-eyes-and-ears asked you: ✄ ☂

Send ✄ for a PET PEEVE headcanon.

He doesn't like Obama. He really doesn't like Obama. He votes Republican, every election.

His pet peeve isn't Obama.

His pet peeve is people who go "but you're GAY, shouldn't you LIKE Obama?" Saying that to him is a good way to get decked.

Fortunately that doesn't happen very often, because he tries to stay in the closet in as many social circles as possible. But when it DOES he wants to kill somebody.

Send ☂ for a FOOD headcanon.

He has a super utilitarian approach to food. He prefers convenience over fanciness or flavor. 90% of his diet consists of canned soup, TV dinners, and 5-hour energy.

So whenever somebody takes him out for Real Food, he'll devour it ravenously. The fact that he takes the utilitarian approach doesn't mean he enjoys it. Give him a nice lemony chicken piccata covered in capers and pasta with a side of buttered asparagus mixed with crumbled feta and bacon and you might reduce him to tears of joy.

Okay he won't actually CRY but still.

He only really has one major restriction on his diet: no cows. He doesn't discuss his religious leanings much, but he IS a Hindu--devout, at that--and so he doesn't consume beef. He's not one of those that goes all the way to vegetarianism but at least on that point, he's strict.

But he doesn't make a big deal about it because he doesn't want to be seen as weird or foreign. It just means that, like, if he's with a study group that goes out to McDonald's for snacks, while they get burgers he'll get the fish filet or a salad.

[idcallyoudarling]

all 3 of the soundwaves on the nemesis

..gracious, there’s three? I haven’t been on their Nemesis, but I know of two.

The-Eyes-and-Ears:

Attraction level: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

Love for the Character:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

How much the char has grown on me: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

Badassness level:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

How upset I’d be if the char got killed off:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

Silent-Communications:

Attraction level: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

Love for the Character:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

How much the char has grown on me: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

Badassness level:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

How upset I’d be if the char got killed off:1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10

[idcallyoudarling]

For your records.

I know you asked already, but I thought writing a more complete log would be productive of me as I'm just lurking about.

Serial number: E-001-0306

Alias(es): 306, Lady, "Nancy" [given, not wanted]

Frame: Eradicon [Helicon, formerly jetticon]

Former occupations [from most to least current, including direct superior]:

mining operations adviser [Breakdown]

scout team #32 point [Starscream]

general communications tech [Soundwave]

general maintenance staff [Alternated frequently, but this was my usual designation until I was stationed aboard the Nemesis]

Those from my timeline: Rumble, 17, 27, Soundwave, Wheeljack, Lockdown, Starscream, Skywarp, Shockwave, Ravage... 

Friends [within the multiverse]: 17, 27, Swerve, Skywarp, Akiba, Iago, Bumblebee, Knock Out, Bluestreak,

Enemies [within the multiverse]: Kaon

Past transgressions [in no order, heaven if I remember]:

[Nemesis] Sent to brig by officer Dreadwing for questioning due to the events surrounding an officer's violent breakdown. No further punishment incurred after, and it was later erased from my record.

[Peaceful Tyranny; Alternate] Trespassed and punished under Tarn's "authority". Later given leave of absence by Breakdown to recover from mental and physical trauma sustained.

[Earth; Missouri] Altercation with rogue Stunticon member Dragstrip under officer Breakdown's authority.

[Nemesis; Alternate] Altercation with an Alternate Knock Out who illegally kidnapped serial number E-001-0017. Otherwise unreported and left unpunished.

[Death's Head; Nemesis] Captured by rogue Decepticon Lockdown under questionable legality, but later released. Punished only for "shirking" responsibilities.

[Nemesis] Reported to Soundwave for illicit communications with the Autobots. Upon further interrogation no formal punishment was rendered. Instead officer Soundwave re-purposed the activity towards espionage, having me report all further conduct with the Autobots to him.

[???] Altercation with an unknown Mnemosurgeon leading up to having my processor toyed with... I left them a very different mech than when I arrived. I prefer not to dwell on it.

Which is about it, really. Anything else I can recall is petty at best; you know, the light reprimand here or there when your coworkers and you are having a little too much fun while working.

[monumentalmistakes]

the-eyes-and-ears asked you: ✧

Where do I think our relationship will be in ten years?

«Optimistically, it would be much where it is now: with I as your lord and you as my officer. But more realistically, I think that we'll have parted ways by then, with you going off to serve in another universe--most likely under a still-living Lord Megatron. With luck, our parting will be cordial.»