So there was a scene in the new AoS episode that just made me think that your url is way too accurate (Leo Fitz is a sassmaster)
He is indeed! But when I read this the first time I didn’t see the part in brackets and I thought you were referring to when evil-worm!Will knocked him down and then there was a very strategic ass shot á la the winter soldier. And I got so excited because when I saw it I was like ‘there it is, the ass’ and I thought someone else had noticed but nope, I’m just as creep.
And now that you’ve had a very unecessary peek inside my head, sorry I didn’t reply sooner but working retail at christmas is .... deplorable is the word that comes to mind but I can’t rember the definition so idk why it came to mind?
I LOVE the amount of background work you put into your fic (namely To Be Myself). I just finished To Be Myself and it was incredible - but I loved even more being able to go onto your blog and see the thought you put into every background detail, and see pictures and meta and such. It adds so much to the story, and I just love it.
THANK YOU!!!! It’s so happy-making to see that it is still being read even though I posted it … is it half a year ago now? I tend to think of fanfiction as having a short expiration date, so I am kind of swooning here.
I loved working on that story so much. Even though I was alive during that time, the chronology of what-happened-when mishmashes together in my brain – plus I’m younger than GenX!Kurt, so I was paying attention to different things. I did end up doing a lot of research, and reading some fascinating books about that time … And I have to say that was half the fun in writing the story. Research is always that way for me. It helps me understand the characters and connect the dots of the plot. A lot of times, it’s what gives the story any structure at all. Plus, it fills my head with all these random facts that I otherwise wouldn’t know. (Like, I can totally follow a conversation about model airplanes based on research I did for a different story, even though I’ve never flown one.)
I’m glad you enjoyed the bonus stuff as much as I enjoyed putting it all together. That’s the icing on the cake (or non-sugary metaphor of your choice)!
p.s. I have a Burt mirror fic in that 'verse that I keep meaning to finish and post. Maybe you can nag me about it. :)
And this city is scary when no one is there to share it with
thelimabeaner prompted me to write a Klaine fic that went along with the song "Bleecker and 6th" by Jesse Ruben and I listened to the lyrics and wow - I thought of something for Klaine very quickly. So go take a listen to the song!
Summary: Blaine is in New York and feels lost and alone. AU, Klaine never met in high school.
Blaine is drowning.
The city is huge and busy and frankly terrifying, though New York has been what he has dreamed about for years. Now that Blaine's there, he's lost. Terrified of doing everything wrong and ending up with nothing - not his dreams or a place to be.
School itself is overwhelming. NYADA is a prestigious school, after all, and the work load and teachers reflect this. Whereas Blaine has always been The Best, now he's surrounded by everyone who was The Best in their own schools and glee clubs.
His parents are paying for quite a few of his things, but Blaine also gets a job to pay for things he knows they won't even bother paying for and is making sure to save and save for a future he's suddenly so unsure of.
Mostly, when Blaine gets back to his single dorm (thank God for small miracles) he just wants to lay down and cry and he wants someone to hold him.
By the time Blaine's been in the city for a month, he still hasn't gotten the hang of anything. Not the subway or the ins and outs of the city or his classes. He stands at a cross street completely lost - literally.
Now he's not so sure he can.
Blaine pushes himself away from the wall and walks into a nearby coffee shop. He thinks he needs a coffee now more than anything, plus he can figure out how to get to the music store he'd been wanting to go to.
Blaine orders his usually, a medium drip, when it's his turn at the register and reaches for his wallet - and finds that it isn't there.
He checks all his pockets, in both his pants and his jacket, realizing that it's not anywhere. His heart sinks. He hopes he just left it in his bag for school and he wasn't pick pocketed or something.
"I'm sorry I don't -" he looks up at the barista holding his cup and writing down his order. "I don't have my wallet. I'm sorry, I'll just -"
"Here."
A hand reaches across from him, handing the barista a ten dollar bill.
Blaine looks just beside him, where a guy has stepped up from behind him in line. He's tall and has perfectly styled hair and bright blue eyes. He looks to Blaine and smiles.
God, he's handsome.
"And I'll have a grande non-fat mocha," he tells the barista.
"You don't have to pay -" begins Blaine.
"No it's fine," says the guy. "Looks like you need that coffee." He takes the change from the barista and they move to the side, out of the way of a business man on his phone.
"Thank you," says Blaine softly. He's honestly shocked. It's the first time that he's been in the city that someone has really interacted with him - and nicely, at that. "I can't believe I left my wallet at home. Or at least I hope that's why I don't have it."
"It's no problem," says the guy. "It happens to us all. And I hope that's the reason, too." Then he tilts his head. "You look lost?"
"I was - trying to find this music store. But not much point now. I'll just have to go back home since I don't have my wallet and find it another time," says Blaine.
"Well, I hope you find it when you do," says the guy with a soft smile. He reaches out to grab his coffee when it's set on the counter and Blaine goes to get his as well.
"Thank you again for the coffee," says Blaine.
"It's no problem," says the stranger. "And good luck on everything." He smiles one last time at Blaine, a smile that makes his stomach flip, and then turns to leave. And Blaine just watches him go, only realizing when he's out of the door and out of sight that he doesn't know his name.
He really, really should have gotten his name.
And his phone number.
But Blaine sat stupidly as a cute guy bought him a coffee and did nothing.
Blaine makes his way home, disappointed in himself. At least his wallet is in the front pocket of his school bag.
Blaine kicks himself for weeks after that. It's just as hard to live in the city as before, but maybe it's getting a little bit better. At least he does't get lost as often anymore and the music store he finds really is amazing. But really, he just wishes he had gotten the guy's name and number. Even if he wasn't gay, he could have at least been a friend.
No one at school really seems into connecting - besides getting a strong duet partner for projects, that is. He's met with some people outside of class to work on things and practice, but it's never gone to lunch or coffee or anything that friends do.
To be honest, the city is scary by himself.
Blaine doesn't go out too late at night. Doesn't go anywhere besides school and the job he found at the same music store he'd gone to visit that day a few times a week. Sometimes he'll go get coffee as a treat, but he can't afford to get a cup everyday. Mostly he sits inside his dorm and practices monologues and dances and songs for classes.
When Blaine does do something fun. Maybe go down to the park and sees a cute old couple sitting across from him or a little girl walks up to him and tells him he's pretty and then goes back to her mother smiling or he nails his dance solo for class and even Miss July can't find fault in him - he can't tell anyone about it.
His parents don't really care. They call each other every few weeks so Blaine can tell them he's still alive. His brother usually talks about himself on his calls and he finds himself not able to share things with his few friends from high school that he still talks to on Facebook.
He just wants to share his small successes with someone. Wants someone to take care of him and someone to take care of in turn.
Why can't he have that?
Blaine knows he should get out more. Meet people. But that's hard. He knows he was pretty sociable in high school and put himself out there - but when there is absolutely no one he knows here, it's harder.
So Blaine takes smaller steps. He starts going to the park more and sitting on a bench to read a book or listen to music. He knows he isn't really meeting people at school, where he should be meeting people, but sometimes someone will sit down and they'll talk about the book he's reading or the weather or silly things like that.
It's not a strong connection, but at least for a few minutes, Blaine feels like he's with someone. He laughs and they laugh and things feel better for a while.
A few weeks after he starts doing this, sitting down and reading on a bench in the park, someone sits next to him.
Blaine doesn't look up right away. Sometimes some creepy people sit next to him, people he doesn't really want to talk to. So he lets them have the opportunity to talk to him first.
In this moment, that works out well.
"Hey," says a voice. A familiar voice.
Blaine looks up from his book and then does a double take as he looks at the guy sitting on the bench with him.
It's the guy from the coffee shop.
"I think you're the guy I met down at Bleecker and 6th, right?" asks the man, a smile on his face.
"I - yes," says Blaine.
"I'm Kurt," says the guy and Blaine's heart jumps. A name! Finally.
"I'm Blaine," he says in return and Kurt smiles at him and Blaine finds himself smiling back.
"Small world," says Kurt. "Well. Not really. This city is huge, so it's crazy we met again."
"Yeah," says Blaine. "Crazy."
"Were you able to find your way? You were lost when we last met," says Kurt.
Blaine thinks about that for a moment.
"I think I'm still a little lost," he admits. "But I think I'm starting to find my way."
And somehow, Kurt gets what he means and doesn't think he's crazy.
"I was the same way when I got to the city a little over a year ago," admits Kurt. "I'm just glad I had my roommate with me. I would have been even more lost without her. She was an anchor - we both were for each other."
"I wish I had an anchor," says Blaine.
Kurt looks to him and then nods. "Maybe you'll find one soon," he says and his tone is full of hope and questions.
Blaine looks down shyly.
Somehow, they sit on that bench and talk until it gets dark and too cold to stay outside, so Kurt suggests getting coffee and some dinner. So they go to a diner that Kurt knows called Spotlight and they sit in a booth in the corner and talk some more over burgers. Then they get some coffee and sit there even more.
Hours and hours go by and Blaine knows it's getting too late to be sitting with a person he's just met in a diner he's never been to, but Kurt makes no move to leave and Blaine doesn't mention it either and somehow, the sun rises through the windows of the diner.
Kurt pauses in what he'd been saying - he works for Vogue.com and has been telling Blaine stories of it off and on all night - then looks at Blaine for a long moment.
"What?" asks Blaine.
"I want to do something," says Kurt. "And I think it will be okay. But I don't want to...." he trails off.
"Don't want to what?"
"Do something that you won't like," says Kurt. He sounds honest.
"I don't think that's possible," says Blaine.
Kurt smiles at him. Then he moves to sit next to Blaine in the booth and then he's reaching up and putting his hand on Blaine's cheek and then leaning in to kiss him.
It takes Blaine's breath away and he realizes that this is the connection he'd been hoping for. Then he kisses back like his life depends on it.
"Thank you," says Blaine.
Kurt just laughs and shakes his head. "For what?"
"For coffee. For being nice to me. For making the city seem less cold? I don't know." Blaine sighs and looks Kurt in the eye. "I'll figure out exactly why I'm thanking you at some point. I promise."
Kurt's eyes soften at that. "I'll hold you to it."
When Blaine walks back to his dorm after he and Kurt part (after exchanging numbers), the city doesn't seem as scary anymore. He's not alone anymore.
That summer Kurt and Blaine find a little apartment on Bleecker and 6th that they move into.
