“Is it a bad idea to use mountain dew instead of milk in your cereal ??” // @theoriginalcount liked for a starter
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“Is it a bad idea to use mountain dew instead of milk in your cereal ??” // @theoriginalcount liked for a starter
@theoriginalcount liked for a thing
“Oh look. It’s you again.” Out of all the faces in this city that she doesn’t want to see ever again, his is pretty darn high on the list. Then again, most mass murderers that she knows of fall on that list, in all fairness. Zoe wants to sigh deeply, but bites her lower lip to suppress the urge. “To what do I owe the pleasure, Count?”
[Text] So I just watched this porn and the porn star looks just like you. It kind of turned me on from theoriginalcount
theoriginalcount
[text] Aw shit.
[text] What’s the porno’s name?
[text] I was in one once...
Feel that? from theoriginalcount
Send, “Feel that?” for my muse’s reaction to yours slipping their hand down the front and inside of my muse’s pants while they are sitting together watching TV.
"Yeah." She's half drunk, and pretty out of it, but she can feel it. "Yeah, your hands are cold as fuck. What the hell. Isn't warming up part of basic etiquette?"
❖ from theoriginalcount
Send a ❖ and I will generate a random number for my muse to say to yours!
Being underestimated had been her goal for a long time, but it was a double edged sword. More than anything else, Beelzebub was proud. There was only so much talking down she could take, or would take.
That was how the noble man found himself knocked down on the floor. He was still conscious, which she thought a blessing. It was no fun if he was knocked out.
"That’s all right… you’ll learn."
Ship meme the count and laine
send me a ship and I’ll tell you who:
shops for groceries: Laine. The Count doesn't really need food. Not the normal type anyway...
kills the spiders: The Count probably.
comes home drunk at 3am: Both.
makes breakfast: The Count. But only if he's feeling like spoiling Laine.
remembers to feed the fish: No fishes, just Female. She remembers both of them. All the time.
decorates the apartment: Laine. The Count could care less and would probably hire someone.
initiates duets: Neither.
falls asleep first: Laine. Lazy as a cat, the sex would knock him out cold and oh...The Count sleeps during the day.
theoriginalcount
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.-theoriginalcount
Texts From Last Night Meme!
[text] I told you not to let me get that high. I fucking sweare
[text] swer
[text] swear
[text] I am feeling it right now.