especially bc i write about love so often, and i have yet to experience any of it in my actual life. but i want to so fucking bad. i wanna go through the awkward talking stage. i wanna lay in bed all night thinking of the other person and what they’re up to or if they’re thinking about me too. i wanna learn their favorite songs, their irrational fears, or why they don’t speak to their family anymore. i wanna know what their skin feels like against mine. i wanna hold somebody and be a home for them. i wanna associate a scent with their presence. i wanna be held by someone. i want to provide for somebody. i wanna be taken care of by somebody. i wanna love and i wanna be loved. but it just seems so… unreasonable or unrealistic. like i’m asking for too much. so unattainable. and it really gets to me sometimes.