The Shackles of My Mind
They say we learn from our mistakes. But if that's what it takes, I'm a poor student of life. Even if the light shines green and not red, You can find me hiding away. Crouched in the shadows instead.
I'm constantly fighting the thoughts in my head. These thoughts that are driving my motions are fed, By moments that keep swirling in my mind. Real or not, it makes no difference as I find, That instead of taking a rest, they're keeping me blind.
Being fed by fears for so long, Their hands have become too strong, To quickly break away from. But I try, with little steps, To push away their dire threats. What if I try again and see, That the problem was not me. Or anything at all. Was there even a problem after all?
But that scares me even more. Because it could mean that all I've done before, Were just foolish acts I wouldn't break away from. I'm afraid it will make me seem like weak scum. At least, that is what my head is telling me.
But will others look at me with these same thoughts? Will they give me the same names I give myself? Or will I find that my mind has fed me lies again? Once I break away from these chains, Can I possibly leave behind these blames?
It makes me want to hope for future times, Where my mind will no longer bind me to my crimes. But instead tells me warming affirmations, Like how I'm also deserving of celebrations. Maybe then I'll finally see, That my mind's deceit Can be just A false voice Made of dust.